The Spood and Matt Show

Matt hadn't backed a Melbourne Cup winner since he was ten, and two horses he backed in a row died. This year Phoebe told him they were in the parade ring, a mate's tip had one horse in it, and he put $100 on the nose of Point Of Law at $8.70 with seconds to spare. Spood's grandmother picked Goodie Two Shoes. Second last. Also: how Ciaron Maher gives seven jockeys a race plan, Steven B...

Matt lasted four days in telemarketing. He went off script, got accused of running a prank call, and hung up on an old lady who was getting out of bed to buy raffle tickets. Also: the Catcheroos have a sponsor who hasn't been told, Matt discovered Do Not Disturb four weeks ago, Sophie the AI receptionist and the caller he asked "are you AI?", Mark Cuban's old plane, the last cast...

The Idol verdict is in. Fanman got the email this week: unsuccessful, thanks for your time, feel free to try again. He has never been so relieved. The whole audition story, finally: the Zoom button he didn't click for thirty minutes, eight producers at a long table, "anyone else here tone deaf?", and the question he had no sob story for. Also, recorded on Spood's front deck in Ne...

Spood carries a hanky. Fanman thinks that's disgusting ("the wet spot and the crunchy spot"). So they settle it with history: where the word handkerchief comes from, why dropping one was medieval flirting, the king who made them square, and the flu pandemic that gave us tissues. Also: Fanman's message tone performed, "vaccine" comes from the Latin for cow, where "h...

Fanman wrote the Spood and Matt ringtone. It has lyrics. He sang it on the show, then explained every line, including why his charger is at home and why his pants are ripped. Spood's review: "I didn't get it." Also: where the wooden spoon comes from (Cambridge, a maths exam, a spoon the size of an oar), the grand final from the Prince of Merewether, would you pay $1,800 for a box...

Newcastle has gone mad: pubs full on a Tuesday, fences painted red and blue, 12,000 at an open training, skip bins painted at Merewether. Spood lives there and reports in, a day early so nobody has to choose between us and the grand final. Also: Australia's new wife carrying champion, Victor, calls in from the Singleton Show (the Worlds are in Finland and the prize is your wife's weight in...

DC Comics sent Matt a letter about Fanman, and this week it was on Channel 7, Channel 9, the ABC and 2GB. He can't say much about where it goes from here, but he can tell you how it started: people kept walking into a lighting shop asking if it sold fans, so he bought a number plate that said FAN MAN. A Newcastle radio station's advice was to rename the shop "Lights and Fans." Al...

Phoebe played the tambourine for four hours at a Sunday session and came into work limping. She's back with a bee fact she still doesn't understand, and she's the first person to hear about Classic Catches Australia and ask what a classic catch is. Also: Matt hid from his piano teacher for an entire term, Matt has been eating the wrong half of the egg for years, Australia has a nationa...

A naked man ran the length of the Dubbo grand final at half-time, struggled over the picket fence, and it turns out he did the same thing at the last home grand final in 2014. Matt was standing right there and now has a theory about streaking being the most selfless act in sport. Also: a humanoid robot ran 100 metres in 8.86 seconds, a fighting robot lost its head and kept swinging, LIV Golf has f...

Matt let himself into a customer's house with their spare key to use the toilet. 31 minutes later, the customer came home. Guest Jack (Matt's former right-hand man, and a 1% Club contestant) once fell through a stranger's ceiling and hung there like a koala until the homeowner walked in. Also: a pub that asks for a tip before anyone says hello, a green ant in the worst possible locatio...

Spood pays up the missed-plane story: three eighteen-year-olds asleep ten metres from the check-in counter in Madrid, one unnoticed time zone, and a 36-hour airport stay on two-euro cheeseburgers. Also: the Australian Idol audition is officially booked, Silly Jill debuts by unwrapping an entire birthday's worth of presents that weren't hers, the counting clip goes properly viral, and the b...

Celebrity guest number three is Fliss: accomplished actress, former Summer Bay villain, and Spood's sister. She shares some yarns with us, like how she once played the character who got a Home and Away lead hooked, copped the trolling for it, and once faked an earpiece to walk past security at Big Day Out chasing one goal: a high five from Flea. Also: your going-under stories read out, the cro...

Matt is Australian and does not like the beach. Sharks, wind in his ears, sand in everything, no shade, and he'd like some trees planted. Spood counters with how Brazil does beaches properly, including the island where "even the sharks are friendly" (they are not). Also: the AI that wrote Henry a 100-page novel, why Lily calls it Claudia, the hospital fork back scratcher, an improvis...

Matt submitted a parody song to Australian Idol as a joke, told them he can't sing, and got invited to the producer auditions. He's also four days out of shoulder surgery on a nerve block that never worked, so Phoebe from the shop is in the third chair. Also: where butterfly actually came from, the fettler who lost his skin to a steel toilet, the woman scamming the can machine with paper c...

The royal midweek wedding has happened: Henry was MC, the quiz answers were made up, and a fan name was born at midnight. Also: why the best man was originally your best fighter, Cranky Frank and the elevator chair, the stranger who rescued two broke 18-year-olds in Spain, and the $500 we begged from a men's magazine. Two cousins, no agenda, weekly. CHAPTERS: (00:00) The royal midweek wedding:...

Episode 10, and the show has its first ever guest: the beef fingers listener himself, dialling in uninvited, in a suit, from a house with no electricity. Also: Fanman gets fangirled in his own driveway, the case against butterfly, twelve beers and a newborn, and a meat tray threat in Warilla. Two cousins, no agenda, weekly. CHAPTERS: (00:00) A Silly Jim yarn: the original tailgate (05:45) Family c...

The fight happened. The debrief is here, no spoilers, except that it involves a doctor, a scan, and a scar Matt intends to be proud of. Also: the scar stories, Henry towed up a Bondi hill on a pushbike behind a ute, a nation of coffee addicts, and the debut of Silly Jim. Two cousins, no agenda, weekly. CHAPTERS: (00:00) Toy Story and the uncultured swine (02:45) Favourite movie quotes and rap movi...

A listener wrote in with a Lakers courtside scam that puts the business class trick to shame. Also this week: lobster's journey from dog food to delicacy, Paris pulling off history's greatest rebrand, the $2,500 ticket debate, what touring musicians actually get paid, and Matt's fight week diary: mini panic attacks and a parody song walkout. Two cousins, no agenda, weekly. CHAPTERS: (0...

Matt got lured to the pub with free beers and left as the under 6s rugby coach. Also this week: the 2011 McDonald's Monopoly play that ended in fifty small fries and no car, dumpster wagyu and tuck shop scabbing, a smuggled rum brick in Darwin, Henry's UFO rabbit hole, and the CCTV footage that solved the mystery at the front gate. Two cousins, no agenda, weekly. CHAPTERS: (00:00) Stitched...

Two cousins, no agenda, weekly. Episode 6. This week: Matt's unpopular opinion that soccer is the spaghetti bolognese of sports, Henry's elaborate scheme of sneaking into Qantas business class, a soccer riot at a Uruguay vs Argentina game with actual moats around the pitch, Matt sneaking from C section to the front row at an AC/DC concert, Fliss getting backstage at a Red Hot Chili Peppers...

Two cousins, no agenda, weekly. Episode 5. This week: a listener wrote in to tell us beef fingers already exist (Ronan Leach reckons they're called sausages — we strongly disagree), McDonald's car park eating etiquette, Matt's swag in a Sydney park ending in a 3am torch from the cops, the time Matt threw a sour Skittle and hit our teacher Murph in the eye, drawing d*** on Dave's sh...

Two cousins, no agenda, weekly. Episode 4. This week: Jock's wedding RSVP got hijacked by a guy we're calling Barry Sly, Matt's update on the upcoming charity fight (the dress code is COCKTAIL), a Japanese girl bowed to Matt at a zebra crossing in the rain, a grandfather picked up the wrong kid from daycare, Matt tried to flip a free grand piano off Gumtree and it didn't end well,...

Two cousins, no agenda, weekly. Episode 3. This week: where Coca-Cola got Santa from, why tennis balls turned yellow, Volvo giving away the three-point seatbelt, Henry going deep on Claude AI in his Pilates business, Matt's COVID-era massage that opened with a face full of Glen 20, modelling for a stranger at Myer in 2013, growing up doing School of the Air, and the years-long mystery of the l...

Episode 2. Two cousins, no agenda, weekly. This week: Matt at the Dubbo Show watching Paul the dodgem carnie get cracked twice by the same girl in reverse, the moment we invented "beef fingers" live on air, Matt's much-debated stance on weather chat being lazy small talk, ram balls at the show, the talent show iPod scandal of 2007, and Henry's new baseball obsession with Shohei O...

History, mystery and the world of small business. Two cousins, no agenda, weekly. Spood (Henry) and Matt McKay grew up together in regional NSW and they're still telling each other the same stories, they just hit record this time. In this episode: Matt's catastrophically bad Microsoft password, Henry getting the call-up as MC at the royal wedding of mate Jock, Matt's upcoming charity b...