The Simplicity Parenting Podcast with Kim John Payne

In this episode, Kim John Payne explores the importance of helping children learn to delay their requests and respect the timing of others. Rather than always responding immediately or brushing kids off with a vague “in a minute,” Kim encourages parents to offer clear, specific guidance on when they can give their full attention. He offers practical phrases and techniques for children of different...

In this episode, Kim John Payne explores a dynamic he calls “aggression entrapment,” where a child’s meltdown becomes a way to secure a parent’s full attention. He explains that frequent meltdowns can signal a child’s need for stronger, more consistent parental presence—not just during crises, but in everyday connection. Rather than becoming entangled in the emotional intensity, Kim suggests offer...

In this episode, Kim John Payne explores how parents can navigate escalating situations without making a child feel abandoned. He draws a clear distinction between “walking away” in frustration and “stepping back” with intention. The latter offers a child the reassurance that their parent is still emotionally present, even while taking space to calm down. Kim encourages parents to model the abilit...

In this episode, Kim shares thoughtful ways to support an older child when a newborn joins the family. He emphasizes the importance of maintaining closeness through physical touch and preserving familiar family rhythms. Parents are encouraged to be intentional about cuddling, storytelling, and small rituals, so that the older sibling continues to feel secure and included. One particularly touching...

Kim John Payne offers a view of adolescence by comparing teenage emotions to an artesian water flow. While younger children often express their feelings outwardly, teenagers tend to turn inward. Their emotional lives may seem hidden, but underneath the surface there is a deep, steady movement as they process and explore. Kim encourages parents not to force immediate responses but instead to place...

Kim reflects on the beauty and importance of slow learning. He invites parents to protect and nurture a child’s natural tendency to wonder, observe, and inquire. Instead of immediately reaching for quick answers through digital means, he suggests creating space for questions to unfold over time. One idea he shares is keeping a “wondering notebook,” where children can write or draw the things they...

In this episode, Kim John Payne explores how young children experience emotions as full-body states, rather than isolated feelings they can easily identify and name. He expresses concern about the modern emphasis on naming emotions with young children, noting that their brain development often does not support this level of emotional analysis. Instead of asking children to explain or label their f...

Kim offers a fresh perspective on childhood anger, inviting parents to view it as a natural attempt to restore emotional balance. Anger may surface when a child feels powerless, ignored, or overwhelmed, and while it can be loud or disruptive, it is not something to fear. Using the metaphor of a blacksmith’s forge, Kim explains how parents can stay close without getting swept into the heat of the m...

In this episode, Kim expands on the idea of previewing as a key parenting tool that brings calm and predictability to family life. He describes two types of previews: larger ones that look ahead to the day or week and smaller, moment-to-moment ones that guide children gently through transitions. Previewing helps children develop an inner picture of what’s to come, which in turn reduces anxiety and...

Kim shares a simple yet powerful approach for when things are heading in a difficult direction with children. The process includes four steps: calm it down, work it out, put it right, and move it on. He emphasizes that meaningful resolution only begins once emotions have settled, so calming the situation is the essential first step. This might involve quiet presence, gentle touch, or a calming sto...

In this episode we hear how to help a child who insists on being helped do things they are perfectly capable of doing themselves, and how to support them in finding ways to problem solve and build greater agency and competency. 📓 Discipline & Guidance Care Professionals Seminar ❤️  Support the Podcast 📑   Simplicity Parenting Starter Kit 📲   Request a Consultation with Kim Jo...

In this episode we explore why children cling on to a parent at bedtime and refuse to sleep unless they mom/dad/caregiver is laying next to them. As always we hear about ways to help this tendency that mainly relate to establishing times of connection throughout the day. 📓 Discipline & Guidance Care Professionals Seminar ❤️  Support the Podcast 📑   Simplicity Parenting Starter Kit...

In this episode we explore how to help tween and teens develop a plan for when things go wrong and how to adjust in order to keep moving towards their goal. 📓 Discipline & Guidance Care Professionals Seminar ❤️  Support the Podcast 📑   Simplicity Parenting Starter Kit 📲   Request a Consultation with Kim John Payne 📚   Simplicity Parenting Book Store

In this episode we explore how to sense when the moment is right to give a simple day-to-day instruction, or to have one of “those” talks that every parent need to do from time to time. 📓 Discipline & Guidance Care Professionals Training ❤️  Support the Podcast 📑   Simplicity Parenting Starter Kit 📲   Request a Consultation with Kim John Payne 📚   Simplicity Parenting B...

In this episode we discuss the concept of restraint collapse and the need for decompression points to help children manage their stress. Kim also emphasizes the importance of setting up a predictable and structured after-school rhythms to ease restraint collapse. Additionally, Kim suggested incorporating decompression points and providing a calm environment to help children manage their stress and...

When issues come up with tween and teens, how can we have conversations with them that help them feel safe to participate and work things through. ❤️  Support the Podcast 📑   Simplicity Parenting Starter Kit 📲   Request a Consultation with Kim John Payne 📚   Simplicity Parenting Book Store

In this episode we explore why children can enlarge their accounts of what happened when things went wrong. We break it down to three tendencies and what we can do to help a child gain a better and more accurate perspective of what happened and how we can work through the trouble spots events to a better understanding. ❤️  Support the Podcast 📑   Simplicity Parenting Starter Kit 📲 &nbs...

Kids who relentlessly complain and whine can often get on a parents nerves no matter how well balanced we are. In this episode we explore why kids whine and what we can do to help them move beyond this habit to feel more seen, heard and connected to a parent. ❤️  Support the Podcast 📑   Simplicity Parenting Starter Kit 📲   Request a Consultation with Kim John Payne 📚   Simpl...

In this episode we explore how to shift hurtful words and actions by calling up the helpful and healing moments that a child, tween or teen brought to those around them, and how this helps us stay well oriented and regulated even in difficult parenting moments. ❤️  Support the Podcast 📑   Simplicity Parenting Starter Kit 📲   Request a Consultation with Kim John Payne 📚   Sim...

In this episode we explore how to prevent over-helping a child clean up their toys and projects, and how this helps them develop agency and competence that will serve them throughout life. ❤️  Support the Podcast 📑   Simplicity Parenting Starter Kit 📲   Request a Consultation with Kim John Payne 📚   Simplicity Parenting Book Store

In this episode we will explore how to talk to children, tweens and teens about their big feelings. We’ll see a simple model that shows you how to guide a young child so that they can ground their feelings and a teen be able to better understand their strong emotions, and by doing so you build a stronger attachment bridge and feeling connection with you child. ❤️  Support the Podcast 📑 &nbsp...

In the last of this three part series Steve walks us through the skill of conversing with this hidden part of yourself that can help with almost any dilemma or situation. You can teach it to small children. It can help a teenager’s confidence or sense of direction. ❤️  Support the Podcast 📑   Simplicity Parenting Starter Kit 📲   Request a Consultation with Kim John Payne 📚  ...

 In this follow up episode of our special three part series Steve takes us further into how we can use the Wild Creature Mind to and overcome stress, convert anxiety and heal trauma in childhood ❤️  Support the Podcast 📑   Simplicity Parenting Starter Kit 📲   Request a Consultation with Kim John Payne 📚   Simplicity Parenting Book Store

In this first episode of a special three-part series, Kim John Payne sits down with renowned author and parenting expert Steve Biddulph to talk about his latest book, Wild Creature Mind . This series feels less like an interview and more like a fireside chat between good friends. It is full of warmth, wisdom, and practical insights ❤️  Support the Podcast 📑   Simplicity Parenting Starte...

In this episode, Kim explores the profound benefits of providing children and teens with a simple, balanced life - one that serves as a foundation they can rely on when life’s inevitable challenges arise in young adulthood and beyond. 🍎 Simplicity Parenting Coach Training 📓 Family Life Care Professionals Training ❤️  Support the Podcast 📑   Simplicity Parenting Starter Kit 📲   R...