The Sex, Porn & Love Addiction Podcast

Send us Fan Mail On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre Consider these Life Stages by Dr Thomas Armstrong, Ph. D (www.institute4learning.com): " Here are what I call the twelve gifts of the human life cycle: 1.          Prebirth:  Potential – The child who has not yet been born could become anything – a Michelangelo, a Shakespeare, a Martin Luther King – and...

Send us Fan Mail On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre Life Stages (not Midlife Crises!) is about how Human Development is divided into distinct Stages. Here is a reminder of those Stages: Prenatal -> infancy -> early childhood -> middle childhood -> adolescence -> early adulthood -> middle adulthood -> late adulthood. It is stating the obvio...

Send us Fan Mail On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre Human beings have a life cycle. Each stage is marked by subtle adjustments to cope with the social, economical, cultural and sometimes, chronic stressors of the stage. Here is just one version of Life Stage age grouping categories. There are variants.  Let us look at one version. Each stage looking at the dif...

Send us Fan Mail On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre Let's check that we are on the same page as we have a discussion about ' Values '. I am speaking about such things as being able to be Creative , have Integrity , Fitness , Security , Faith , Self Confidence , Wealth , Winning , Honesty and many more. In the cool light of day, we would never pu...

Send us Fan Mail On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre It is worth listening again to the first part of this topic (in a recent past episode) - entitled: Sex Addict - "I am not a Passive-Aggressive by my behaviours!" -  This is a continuation of that topic talking about Core Emotional Needs . This is part 2 of how Passive-Aggressive behaviours can show...

Send us Fan Mail On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre Grab your popcorn, peanuts and a drink, this is a long episode. It is a bonus episode , bringing it all together in one episode. I was interviewed by Seen&heard (an organisation supporting those traumatised by boarding school attendance) - for whom I am one of their Directory of experienced Therapists wor...

Send us Fan Mail On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre What is passive-aggressive behaviour? Do you fight like this?  Passive-aggressive behaviour is when you express negative feelings indirectly instead of openly talking about them. It is a defence used to protect self. It might stem from early experiences and has become a way to protect self. It might also incl...

Send us Fan Mail On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre Let's talk about how well you really know yourself. Remember that the addiction behaviours are all about self-soothing to manage emotions; a time of escape from life's issues for a while. It means that many other life skills for managing emotions such as stress, pressure, anxiety, upset and other no...

Send us Fan Mail On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre “ I’m the author of my own life story. Unfortunately, I’m writing in pen  and I can’t  e rase my mistakes  but my future will be better than my past .”  - Mr Meet Therapy with The Kairos Centre is all about helping you to better understand you. Helping to move as much of life's issues from the unconsciou...

Send us Fan Mail On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre The Law of Sustainment refers to the principle that your ability to maintain progress towards your goals is closely tied to your self-image and identity. If your inner beliefs do not align with your aspirations, it can lead to inconsistency and failure to achieve lasting change. Put slightly differently: It s...

Send us Fan Mail On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre In this episode, let's say it all in poetry. My Brain And Heart Divorced – John Roedel My brain and heart divorced a decade ago over who was to blame about how big of a mess I have become  eventually, they couldn’t be in the same room with each other now my head and heart share custody of me I stay with...

Send us Fan Mail On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre Many people think that pornography consumption is harmless. Studies, however, have proven that regular consumption can have a negative impact on the brain. Prolonged exposure can alter brain structures, brain functioning and therefore, behaviour patterns. (A Recovery Programme is all about rewiring the brain)...

Send us Fan Mail On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre The antidote to Narcissism is Empathy. (Sympathy and Empathy are very different). Narcissism and Empathy cannot co-exist at high levels together in the same person. (Both cannot be seen being used at high levels in the same person).  There will always be a high level of one and a low level of the other. Make...

Send us Fan Mail On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre Here is my mathematical formula - as we look at Narcissism: SHAME + NARCISSISM = SEX, PORN, LOVE ADDICTION I am not saying that those with Sex, Porn, Love Addiction are Narcissists. (Some may have NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder)). What I am saying is that all of my clients with Sex, Porn, Love Addicti...

Send us Fan Mail On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre Sex - Addict, maybe you really are not yet at the 'ACTION' stage, as you think you are! 'Tools for 'ACTION' won't work if that is not the STAGE you are at.  Let's look at where you might be at, despite turning up at the Therapists office because you have been caught and you...

Send us Fan Mail - On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre Love me in five ways: (See my Book - The Art of Loving ) Most of us operate out of emotional love. Our love is conditional. Loving self comes first. If you do not love yourself, it is not possible to love someone with the high level of love you think you have for them. It is deception to think that we do lo...

Send us Fan Mail - On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre Tools for repairing The Sex Addiction impacted couples relationship Couples get into a conflict dance of words and emotions, mostly because of their Attachment Fears - fears of being Abandoned. The conflict of words is rarely about the actual subject matter in dispute.   There is an under current of despair...

Send us Fan Mail On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre In the 1950's Eric Berne began to develop his theories of Transactional Analysis (TA). He said that verbal communication is at the centre of human social relationships and is a transaction. He called it Transactional Analysis. This is our ingrained voice of authority, absorbed conditioning, learning and...

Send us Fan Mail More on unconscious Couples collusive fit dynamics of attraction By ROSIE IFOULD , 1 August 2011 http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2020944/Do-fight-like-cats-dogs-Or-half-pedestal-How-identifying-couple-type-transform-love-life.html#ixzz36JbJ34V9 Most of us take on set roles in our relationships whether we realise it or not. We like to think that every relationship is uniq...

Send us Fan Mail - On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre Unconscious Couples Collusive fit - of attraction to each other. Identify with any of these dynamics in your partnered relationship - now or in the past? Henry Dicks suggested that there are three areas involved in a couple fit: A public fit of social class, ethnicity and education between couples. Each par...

Send us Fan Mail - On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre Mate/Partner selection, Collusive/Couple fit and all that: Why did I choose you and not someone else on planet earth? " I have never met you before or hardly know you, yet in a room of 100 people, I gravitate to you ". How does that happen? My reply as a Therapist: " Because you 'promise...

Send us Fan Mail - On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre From where did you get your Sex Ed knowledge back there during the developing childhood years, which you have been following through and repeatedly practising in adulthood? Was it ' Peers, banter and porn ' which set up your sexual template, long before school Sex Ed - which got there way too late...

Send us Fan Mail - On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre Part 5 of 5 of an interview with Caroline Brown of -  This Crazy over 40s Life - a Black & ethnicity perspective Here is a portion of an article by Lauren Dubinsky - Founder of Good Women Project: What I Wish I'd Known Before Watching Porn, 2012  "Pornography is a charged subject, and it'...

Send us Fan Mail - On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre Part 4 of 5 of an interview with Caroline Brown of -  This Crazy over 40s Life - a Black & ethnicity perspective Covid-19 contributed to a significant increase in the compulsive use of porn in 10 to 75 years old. Women gravitated to webcam usage during lockdown – maybe coerced by partners making it seem...

Send us Fan Mail - On-Demand Programme Link - https://mailchi.mp/bb2a7b851246/kairos-centre What is 'Manly'? A conversation with Damian Andrews of SHAIR.Care Podcast (Australia) in 2023. Therapy is about you not me. What do you want from Therapy? Are Fetishes or Paraphilia activities to be included? Where does your view come from? Is it your view or a 'hand me down?' What is fo...