The Scott Mills Weekly

Another listener endures the agony of Where Do You Think They Were in a tale involving Simply Red and Champagne and Chris has discovered something amazing - Dissolvable Swimwear - The possibilities are endless.

Cheryl gets the Superfan Steve treatment and it’s CRINGE! Also, why do people’s pets love Scott’s voice and more songs that just bring you bad luck.

We investigate more instances of The Drake Curse, our fake Donald Trump tries to book accommodation in a castle in Blackpool and we have another "dad's eye" view of Love Island.

Donald Trump landed in Britain today so we celebrated by getting friend of the show and celebrity impersonator Luke Kempner on, to be the president and try and book a state visit haircut. We got listener Gemeni on, along with her father Simon, as she failed in her attempt to be on Love Island and we wanted to see what he thought of the contestants this year. Also and amazing instalment of Ask Me A...

Freya Ridings comes in to debut her new track and ends up singing over some garage beats. Plus Chris gives a guide to Norwich for listener Megan and a visit to Arsenal Fan TV.

Scott & Chris were too busy to interview Anne-Marie at Radio 1's Big Weekend so they sent Lewis Capaldi to do it and the interview takes a very strange turn. Plus it's Bamboleo Wednesday and how do you get over someone you never dated?

We revisit May 2015 when Chris booked a room in Norwich for "Mr. Salamander" an intimate waxing for Olly Murs and a bowling alley for Taylor Swift. Also, don't forget to subscribe to Kench on BBC Sounds for some classic 24 Years at the Tap End.

Another Stark Guide, this time to Blackpool, home of a famous waxworks museum and more hotels than Greece! Also listener Max is on to hear how he was conceived in Where Do You Think They Were and his mum charms everyone with her soothing voice.

We bring more of your favourite polyphonic ringtones – remember Encore Une Fois? or Babycakes? Also listener Ryan has a problem with his works Instagram and has Lewis Capaldi been on Radio 1 more than anyone else ever?

Jackie the pet psychic chats to a troublesome cat who likes to watch owner Natasha in the shower, Funny Business brings up one too many “Poutines” and listener Izzy gets to chat to Sam’s Nan Patricia who gives her a stern warning.

Could Chris be the new manager of Middlesbrough? Scott certainly couldn’t – we put him to the test and he just doesn’t do angry. Also, listener Sam, who had trouble finding a date, is back so we audition another contender with Chris role playing the part of Sam’s nan Patricia.

From next week on Radio 1's Kench podcast, Chris Scott wander the rooms and vaults of Scott's mansion "Echo Falls" in the search for some lost tapes. Tapes of Chris's "Autobiography" 24 Years At The Tap End. Every day from Monday 21st May for 12 days, hear tales of strange foreign exchanges, unintended nudity and embarrassing drunken moments in Chris's life.

We look back at May 2013 when Lorraine sat in the wet seat for Innuendo Bingo, we devised a very odd feature called Fish Pie Sue and Chris was booked to go on a suspiciously cheap holiday.

'Where Do You Think They Were' returns with listener David hearing his dad tell the story of where he was conceived. Plus Chris embraces the role of Patricia, a hard to please nan, to question some potential suitors for listener Sam.

Popstar HRVY joins Scott for a game of 'HRVY Fan or Animal' and Dan from Bastille calls in to critique a live ukulele rendition of their new track Joy. Plus someone has made a Dion Dublin Homes Under the Hammer compilation and Chris is away so an actress plays his part for Bangers.

Another Stark Guide takes us to Huddersfield, Chris also goes to Buckingham Palace to search out all the Royal Baby fans, we have another round of Funny Business and listener Sam is having trouble finding a date, so Scott and Chris offer their services.

Chris and Scott are here to take you back to the golden days of May 2012, when Chris used to applaud buskers, Scott wanted to be a Mob Wife and be called “Scotty The Fish” and David “The Hoff” Hasselhoff was in guiding our listeners through awkward situations.

Taylor Swift talks to Scott and Chris about her new album and her love of Stormzy as they both battle it out for the number 1 spot in the charts. Bastille pop in for a Pop Emergency and reveal the date of their new album. And we hear how another listener was conceived as their parents reveal all in Where Do You Think They Were.

The man who seems to always play baddies is here and Scott is a little bit scared. He needn’t be though as Stephen is a nice man who likes nothing more than sitting in the bath with his rubber ducks. Also we have a special Bamboleo recorded with the actual Gipsy Kings at The Royal Albert Hall and we look back at the good old days when TV shows were low-budget rubbish - remember Airline?

We speak to more of you who have had a bad time during student exchanges including Sam who was given a sumptuous meal of… cucumber and water soup! Also listener Aniella gets to speak to her old French exchange student Pierre (which is actually Chris in the other room) and a simple Love Island application turns into Scott and Chris fighting over who has the best legs.

Listener Leanne had some shocking goings on with her toothbrush, we reveal what would get you disqualified in your Love Island application and is Basshunter a superhero in disguise?

Chris & Scott look back at April 2014 when they photo-bombed The One Show, they rode the radio 1 lifts wearing The Sack O Shame and Chris inadvertently called Alice Levine a pig.

Chris brings another Stark Guide, this time all about Cardiff, but again some facts seem a bit dubious. Also, Ali Plumb guides Scott through the new Bond announcement and more of those typical but odd poses in the photos of your profession.

Avengers: Endgame is looking to become one of the biggest movies ever and two of its stars Scarlett Johansson and Chris Hemsworth are here - to throw insults at each other of course! Also Chris is a bit put out that Scott appeared on Match of the Day and why do DJ pics always have them wearing headphones?

Hilarious ways of trying to prove your age when you find yourself out for the night - without your ID, another round of Funny Business and Chris is in big trouble with his mates because he thought it was Monday.