The Reverend John Wheeler Podcast

KETAMINE: Delicious or DEADLY?! That’s the other title. Honestly this is just a frank and open discussion based on John’s casual use and Meredith’s actual clinical use of good old Special K. And about 40 minutes of other stuff. Which if you listen to this podcast, you have to be used to by now.

In this episode, John responds to garbage-ass theories on Facebook about what’s going on with all this UFO business lately. I won’t give it away, but it really seems like we finally got to the bottom of it.

John recaps the notorious Toys R Us Black Friday Acid Story to eulogize Danny Andrews, the main accomplice in that fiasco, whom recently passed away under mysterious circumstances. Also John answers some audience questions. There were many, but only about four that weren’t painfully cringey and pointless. Listen to hear your name!

You are going to learn the real way to build wealth or make a perfect dry martini or smoke a cigarette or maybe where some bodies are. Whatever.

John discovers that releasing a cover song can be a way to gain attention for one’s other releases. John also discovers that he is very out of touch, so he has Bill read audience suggestions while he makes fun of them. If you listen, you may hear your name!

John accidentally makes a new song that everyone loves, AND plays a gig for the first time since 2019. No he has to get back in the music game and it is probably going to ruin his life. Speaking of ruining lives, bill now has to take the bus to the podcast because he got a dwi. And I guess it’s hell, so we are adding a segment called BILLS BUS TIME STORIES! Kinda.

People leaving oppressive religions to start their own oppressive religions around toxic ideologies astroturfed by outside forces bent on destabilization don’t tend to realize the irony and I’m getting tired of trying explain it. Also I finally caught Covid. It sucks, but not that bad. That’s life.

Do you hate all these new rules and regulations? Then don’t follow them. Ever see anyone on 60 Days In because they collected too much rainwater or lied to their doctor? No. Get it together!

Just google the thing I scream about for a solid hour here, and it will blow your mind. If you watch the YouTube version, you can watch Bill’s brain explode in real time!

There are going to be a lot of very obnoxious and empowered pro life protests outside of Planned Parenthood. Remember when the cops would drive by George Floyd demonstrations and spray them with bear mace out of their window? Did you know that you can buy bear mace? We learn a lot of random fun facts on todays episode!

Long story short, it’s way easier to buy an AK47 than it is to get a Xanax prescription, John wouldn’t need the former if he could get the later.

The audio on our big 10th episode extravaganza got totally effed up, so here’s me explaining it for like 20 minutes. Worth a listen? You decide.

John tries to remember what the plot of Top Gun was, and is pretty sure it didn’t have one outside of the whole volleyball scene. Then I think most of the rest of it is about the similarities between Mortal Kombat and Big Trouble in Little China.

The gang got together to go do an escape room, and it sucked. After everyone else went to bed, John kept drinking and made Bill do a late night podcast. It is our job to make sure YOU don’t get ripped off on your way to the TOP!

John gears up for a career in local city government as he is a man of a certain age as well as no longer a homeless drifter. Listen for tips on how YOU can also get more involved in your community.

Learn to lie your way through a book report, become a master of “close enough math”, and never be afraid to coast through life.

Fertility clinics flush more viable embryos than planned parenthood, but you don’t care because no one has told you to care, because they don’t need you to care.

John is going to start working shit jobs just to sue them. A real 21st century business plan. AND YOU CAN TOO!

John motivates you on how to take out evangelical Christians who are ruining your flight WITHOUT ending up on the no fly list. Also all that stuff in the title and MORE.

This is now officially a motivational podcast. We talk about engaging with your community by feeding psychedelic drugs to the local police, having the strong follow through of a child soldier, and how Tipper Gore solved crime forever by censoring music. Also John won’t shut up about how YMH played his industrial metal song about Fed Smoker, which is available on Spotify.

John takes a huge dose of kratom, and talks about all the times he’s over done it with Delta 8 and wound up freaking out on an airplane. He also tries to figure out if, like Jesus, the Easter bunny was originally Jewish. His producer Bill is no help in this matter.