The Relationship-Smart podcast

You are not going to get rid of your suffering and that's okay. We do not need to be wrapped in cotton wool and protected from all the harshness to be okay, which is great, because it would probably be pretty isolating there. We are going to suffer, the trick is to not panic about it. Not to panic about the fear, the anxiety, the sadness, the pain, but to recognise all of these feelings as underst...

How does the way you look or feel in your body influence your desire?  Research shows that us women, in general, need to feel ourselves sexy in order to feel desire. We need to feel sexy in our bodies, our minds, our energies and our imaginations first before we can share ourselves. Does that resonate with you? Come with me on this podcast journey while I explore this a little. Find out more about...

We want certainty in our relationships. We say..."I'll be happy when there is a ring on my finger or we buy that house or we have kids or whatever" Which makes sense, we are human and certainty feels secure. But the cementing in (the grasping for certainty) is also the very thing creating the stuckness that leads us to resentment and eventually a desire to possibly even leave. We deserve relations...

Break ups can be devastating. They are without a doubt big events in our lives. Which is why we need Mackenzie, a break-up specialist. Mackenzie and I chat about the sometimes rough and tumultuous phase break-ups. She herself has navigated 2 very different break-ups; one toxic and one conscious and shares her wisdom with us. We chat about: -her break-up stories and how she navigated them -how to r...

So much happens to your relationship and your sex life after you have kids. Everything changes. Your roles, your sex life, how you spend your time, how you see each other and that's not to mention your expectations of each other. It is big! How do you as a couple, cope with all this change and stress? It can be super hard.  Catherine Topham Sly from Insight and Connection in the UK chat about this...

This episode comes back to the basics of how to get grounded and centred and calm ourselves down, because you know.....life. It is super important, especially in our relationships. What is in your calm-down toolkit? Connect with me via Instagram - www.instagram.com/nicole_mathieson_coach/ or drop me an email - hi@nicolemathieson.com     Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Following on from Self regulation part 1, this episode explores the "how" of self regulation. How do you calm and soothe yourself so that you can be more of a rocking partner in your intimate relationships? Listen in to find out. Drop me an email hi@nicolemathieson.com or find out more at www.nicolemathieson.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Self regulation is sexy. Learning to calm and soothe yourself in your relationship is a skill that will help bring all the things to your relationship life that you want more of. In this episode I talk about the consequences of not having the capacity to self regulate. Then in the next episode, part 2, I share the "how". To get in touch, drop me an email hi@nicolemathieson.com  Hosted on Acast. Se...

In this episode my colleague Ebony from Little Window counselling comes and interviews me. Ebony asks me lots of questions about how to manage our relationships in these strange times of Covid19 and lockdown. We talk about: -The types of problems that people are having in their relationships -How to get time to connect -What to do if you don't feel safe -How to navigate this time if you are dating...

Managing anxiety part 2 - Connecting deeper within How do we stay calm and centred and resilient when there is so much craziness going on? There is so much exposure to stress, there are crazy things happening to all the things we usually lean on, there is a communal sense of anxiety. It has become more important than ever to skill-up and find ways to soothe our own anxiety. Let's grab this time as...

Managing anxiety part 1 - Mindfulness. How do we stay calm and centred and resilient when there is so much craziness going on? There is so much exposure to stress, there are crazy things happening to all the things we usually lean on, there is a communal sense of anxiety. It has become more important than ever to skill upand find ways to soothe our own anxiety. Let's grab this time as an opportuni...

The mental load is a thing and it can cause disconnection in your most important and intimate relationships. Just this last week, I have personally been struggling with the mental load; feeling resentful, tired and cranky. I wanted to share how I dealt with the load and what strategies I have put in place to minimise the future build up of resentment. For more help with the load, check out my onli...

Communication with my husband about anything that mattered used to make me want to run in the other direction. I would try to say stuff, but I would always say it in all the wrong ways and we would just end up: getting defensive and critical of each other  feeling hurt & misunderstood saying things we wish we hadn't and needing some space to calm down The good news is, that you can learn skills an...

Katie Dean is a woman who gives us permission to be ourselves; human. imperfect and messy. Listen as we chat about; The pressure we put on ourselves Katie's journey with breast implants How to embrace life's messiness You can find out more about Katie and grab her new book Messy over at www.ktdean.com.au or on her favourite platform, Instagram @ktdean.com.au Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy...

I am back talking to my dear friend and kundalini yoga teacher Sirgun Lindsay German. Today we are talking about aging gracefully. What happens to us as women when we are no longer pretty young things? What is our value as an older woman? How do we handle aging, menopause and growing older with grace?   Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

A letter to your husband with the reason we are not being intimate aka: having (much) sex.   Hello honey, I just wanted to write and let you know a few things that I have been pondering about our sex life. Firstly, I just wanted to acknowledge you. I know that our sex life  is a frustrating area of our relationship for you. I acknowledge that for you, in an ideal world, we would be having sex lots...

Does he even care about me?  When I ask for more, then he pulls away from me. As far as the dance of intimacy goes, this is a common relational pattern. It goes something like this; You feel like you need more from your partner. More reassurance, care, love & affection and you need this to be okay. In fact, your need has become a kind of anxiety. You want him to scoop you up in your arms and reass...

 Whenever I am feeling stuck or like I am neck deep in the struggle, there is one thing that always helps - listening to some Abraham Hicks.  There is something about the way they continually bring the message back to the simple laws of what you focus on you attract - that reminds me of my power and makes it feel that little bit better.  Which is why I jumped at the chance of interviewing my next...

Are your lady parts numb? How much feeling is down there? Tamra Mercieca is all about self-love, and she means on every level. Which means that Tamra really encourages us to love, and care for our vaginas. Tamra is the founder of Getting Naked, and Yoga for the Vagina. She is a Relationship and Self-Love Therapist, and an author. If the idea of getting back into a state of love with your vagina ma...

I had a revelation recently, it was that the western culture of sexuality really didn’t suit me. In fact, I am pretty sure it doesn’t suit a lot of us. What I am talking about is our sexual narrative that sex always has to have the aim of orgasm. I see it like a train on the tracks. Once we get on the sex train – which could be in the form of touching, petting and kissing – it feels like there is...

Are you ready for my first interview in 2 years?! Yes? Good! If your partner were to feed you eggplant for dinner every night, and you didn't like eggplant, you would say something. Sadly, we don't feel as expressive in the realms of sex and intimacy. We put up with offerings we don't like, year in, year out, and then wonder why we have "lost" our libido. In my conversation with inter-personal sex...

Babe, I want to talk to you, but I can’t find the words, so I am writing to you instead. I want you to know that I am thinking of you and us. I know that you may not know this, because there is a chasm between us. It worries me. We haven’t exactly been very connected lately, have we? This letter to your husband is generic. It is not a personal letter from me to my husband, but more from every woma...

He won’t go to counselling, what should I do? This is a common tale in the realms of hetero-sexual relationships. The wife wants to go to couple counselling, but the husband does not. Can it be the other way around? Absolutely it can, but the man not wanting to go, is so common it is worth exploring. If this is you, I feel for you. This is a horrible situation to be in. You, no doubt, see that you...

Clear out your relationship negativity When we talk about clearing your relationship negativity, what we are really talking about is clearing your resentment. So I am going to share with you; The 3 places where resentment really comes from The 3 destructive effects of resentment build up on your relationship 3 ways for you to release resentment Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more infor...

"I feel lost in my marriage. I don't even know who I am anymore!" This is a common cry from women in my relationship coaching office. Do you feel like YOU in your relationship? Like, really who you are? It can be easy to lose yourself when you are in a long-term relationship. It can be hard to tell where you start and they begin. It can be hard to tell what is changing due to age and maturity and...