The Podcast With No Name KE

It is not enough to say that two men are mad when they spend two hours of airtime talking about the madness in our nation. We will let you listen in and hear our thoughts on this week's episode. Eddy Ashioya and Brian Mbanacho missed this episode. So, you most likely will not hear anyone talking about chapatis or Lavingware.

Good people, Ndugu hasn’t been the same since he got teargassed a few weeks ago. We are receiving info from his mamaa that he is now insisting on drawing a short thick line under his eyes with colgate before going to bed, for he fears a teargass carnister can find its way to his bedroom while sleeping. None of us could reach him on Friday. Daktari Ken came to studio and told us we should not marry...

The DCI had an open position for an assassin. After all the background checks, interviews and testing were completed, they had narrowed the field down to 3 possible agents. For the final test, the DCI agents took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun. 'We must know that you will follow your instructions no matter what the circumstances.' Inside the room you will find your wife...

We thank Linus, or LiNUs, as the president kept calling him, for doing the Lord’s work. We also thank Lattif and Ageyo for the same, but the question we were all hoping they would ask Mr. President is why would the police tear-gass a baddie. We as the podcast cannot move on until we get an answer to this question. One because our audience is almost exclusively made up of baddies and two because we...

It's good to be a baddie. Look, we as the Podcast are #ProMaandamanz and we thank God for eyes. Because the baddies in this revolution are good. My God. Yahweh let your name be praised. The police teargassed the baddies but I was the one crying—tears, tears not out kf teargas but the baddies suffering. God bless the baddies. In this episode, we vehemently oppose anyone who is not on the streets. Y...

There is a godfather hat that Brian pledges allegiance to. He got it from Muthurua Market days before he joined campus. This together with his bell-bottoms won him his first girlfriend on campus. These, and dancing(and if you know Brian, and know dancing, you know Brian and dancing do not fit in a sentence). On this episode, we talked about Brian's hat and his trousers. And his girlfriend who took...

Eddy sounded so wise on Friday's recording, which means one of these things must have happened during his one month hiatus: 1. He got someone pregnant. Nothing sobers you up than the, "We need to talk," phone call that usually precedes the pregnancy news. You suddenly become wise and knowledgable about cycles and false-positives and the need to not take the test in the morning because of HCG level...

You Only Live Once. Unless encountered with something bigger than the self, few people look forward to die. So, the antonym of that YOLO statement is a truth that is barely mouthed. Because of why? Because even though death is certain, it is living that mostly interests people. On this episode we discovered that had the devil succeeded with his plans, we wouldn't have lived past 2015. That is to s...

Ndugu and I have been secretly wondering if Eddy’s don’t touch pants are a cry for help. Whether he has been trying to tell us something but we haven’t been paying attention. To get to the bottom of this, Ndugu has been interviewing psychiatrists and mental health experts for the Business Daily, trying to find out from them whether tiny don’t touch pants are a sign to look out for when you suspect...

We started this show at 12 noon because we were afraid of the rains. That was one hour before our usual call time. The country's main weather man was on every TV giving a gloomy forecast and knowing we have women to love and fans to please, it would be in our best interest and that of those we have mentioned to not die--not just yet. We brought in, Kenyan-based international writer, the great Eunn...

Ndugu is not sleeping well. He is having nightmares about drowning. The floods have brought back memories of when he was living in Kariobangi, forgot to close the tap only to wake up and find everything in his suspicious bedsitter floating in a pool Of water. We spent the better part of Friday assuring him that he is okay now. Eddy, who lives by the side of a river, not to be confused with Riversi...

So apparently before Brian had the ambition to become a musician, he wanted to be an entrepreneur, which is why he invested a lot of money (read, a thousand bob) with his cousin into a chicken business. He was in high school then, already seeing dreaming big, planning to supply all restaurants in Bungoma with chickens and eggs, that until his cousin decided to Murife with the money and he still bi...

The main question we could not answer or come to an agreement in this episode is only one: In the doggy position, who is the DOG? This question needs an answer. What do you think?

With the doctors prolonged strike, we brought in our resident doctor. Daktari wa miti, the bother brother from Kitui Ken to fill in(pun?) the gap(too soon?). Daktari posed a medical question to us, ukifanya DNA after 18 years upate watoto si wako utado? The medical part is the DNA bit. The utado part is more social than medical. Given that you thought ulido na kumbe si wewe ulido, we split opinion...

So Eddy went missing for two weeks and when he came back, he asked if we would be okay with watching two men kiss live-live. I quickly said I would not be okay and asked we remain professional because I thought he was about to kiss Ndugu. Ndugu also quickly looked away and declared he has a woman that he loves very much. “Eddy, love is love, but that’s not why we started this podcast!” Turned out...

By now it’s an open secret that if you can’t chew gum like you are possessed, no one will hire you as their receptionist or M-Pesa lady. Chewing gum calmly is a sign you are a weak person who doesn’t have what it takes to be mean to people. No one will hire you either if you are ever smiling and eager to help others. That kind of good-heartedness is highly frowned upon in these two noble professio...

You know this Podcast is toxic when Ndugu decides to celebrate himself on International Women's Day for being the only boy in his high school to successfully excel both in academics and in his romantic relationship. He was doing so well the school asked him if he would temporarily take over as the school principal so he can show the real principal how proper leadership and excellence looks like. M...

Because we are risk takers, we hosted La Patrona on the podcast where she proceeded to strangle Eddy with her big brains and English, using words like 'decentering men' and 'global south' and 'food sovereignty,' and by the time she was done Eddy wanted his mother. Ndugu, upon learning La Patrona was coming, immediately developed a stomachache and rushed to the hospital, even though sources closer...

If you were in the studio with us for this week's episode, you'd agree that it is upon us to adopt this credo, that no caption can best describe Diana Mosoba. Or some of Diana Mosoba's preternatural ideas about Luo Men, or Luo Men that are mechanics or mechanics that identify as Luo Men. But a caption however uncalled for is important. The main take home from this episode is that as a woman, if yo...

Upendo Nice had a boyfriend cut himself for her because a tattoo was not enough. If Jesus could take three nails for us, what is a knife to a man? So we asked her, "Ama alikuwa anakukatia?" I think she cut us off after that joke. She didn't laugh at that joke and that's how we knew mapenzi yao ilikuwa ya kukata na shoka. Enjoy!

What happens when you get a yeast infection? I don't know. But it can affect how you go and get your daily bread. Poor joke aside, in this episode, we delve into all matters vagina, and boy, we shut our lips as Sarah and Sarah educated us.

It is tempting to think of seasons in terms of mangos. In fact whenever people say they are in a certain season, I like to ask but I don't get to, if those people are mangoes. But it is pointless to ask a human if they are a mango unless you want to squeeze them for juice which is not what happened in this episode. Disclaimer: NOBODY WAS HURT DURING THE RECORDING LF THIS EPISODE. We had a young ma...

But seriously, what do men want? Me I know I want you. Lakini, wewe do you want me? Should we risk? Unaeza nitaka nikikutaka? In this episode we welcomed back Ndugu Abisai, who has shaved his head (the one on top) (of his shoulders). Why would anyone ever leave anyone?

Boy, aren't we happy to be back? In fact, the less we speak the better. This year we identify as Gen Z. Anyone older than twenty-something is hithero referred to as a sponsor of the podcast, to the podcast and for the podcast. So open up your wallet, mubaba and mumama. We missed you! Karibuni!!

You thought we would leave you without one final episode to keep you drooling? Did you and your family have a merry christmas? We pray that the new year 2024 brings you and your loved ones and even enemies — because they have to see what the Lord is doing for you — good tidings. Enjoy!