The Offensive

Ashwood City take on Leeds United in the first league meeting between the two since 2004. Chief Executive Patrick Nolan has had to make slight adjustments to Dartley Park, in order to welcome the Premier League newcomers.  Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan Helena Doughty as Jess Tate   Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall John Brannoch as Colin Walsh Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clint...

Fresh from the International Break as well as the possibility of 'Project Big Picture', Patrick Nolan embarks on his own project as he attempts to put the final nail in the coffin of the Ashwood City Youth Academy, albeit with a little help from some friends in low places.  Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan Helena Doughty as Jess Tate   Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall Additio...

Following the decision to publish false positive COVID-19 test results for Kieran Broom and Kyle Francis-Clarke ahead of England duty; Chief Executive Patrick Nolan is now dealing with the fallout. Determined to get his fixture pile-up resolved, Patrick reaches out to an old ally of the club in an effort to force the hand of the football powers-that-be. Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan Helena Doughty...

For matchweek three of the Premier League; Ashwood City take their perfect record to Craven Cottage. Sporting Director Chris 'Woody' Woodall and Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan, however, have other social commitments. Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall Acushla-Tara Kupe as Dr Rachel Webber Directed by: Adam Jarrell Episode written by: Joel Emery Edited by: Adam Jarre...

Following a bright start to the league campaign, Ashwood City now face Portsmouth in the second round of the Carabao Cup. Sporting Director Chris 'Woody' Woodall is charged with the task of securing an ambitious feeder club for Ashwood City. Patrick and Jess however are distracted by the latest new recruit... Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan Helena Doughty as Jess Tate Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' W...

Premier League football returns as Ashwood City take on Crystal Palace in Matchweek 1 of the new season. With COVID-19 restrictions in place; Dartley Park remains closed to the fans. Chief Executive Patrick Nolan's endeavours to increase matchday revenue for the club lead him to a fan engagement initiative using cardboard cutout selfies to attend the fixture. Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan Helena D...

It's the Semi-Final of the Europa League. Ashwood City take on FC Internazionale as the isolated tournament in Germany moves ever-closer to its climax. Once again, however, the mood in the camp is delicately poised to see the loan saga of Christian Akuffo resolved. Adam Jarrell as Kieran Broom Esmonde Cole as Kyle Francis Clark Acushla-Tara Cupe as Dr Rachel Webber Thomas Mitchells as Theo Cl...

Ashwood's first leg in the round of 16 ended 1-0 to Ashwood in Wolfsburg back in March. Now, along with fellow UEFA Europa League competitors, they find themselves vying for a place in the Quarter Final held in Germany under strict quarantine conditions.  Adam Jarrell as Kieran Broom Acushla-Tara Kupe as Dr Rachel Webber Esmonde Cole as Kyle Francis-Clarke Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton Add...

Premier League survival hangs in the balance as Ashwood City take on Manchester United in the final game of the season.   The Offensive will return at the start of the 2020/2021 season. Thank you for your continued support. Visit  ashwoodcity.com  and  patreon.com/ashwoodcity  for more.  Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall Helena D...

It's the final week of the season, and the battle for Premier League survival hits boiling point as Ashwood City travel to Villa Park. Can The Superwhites continue their run of good form under Interim Head Coach Matt Jansen in their penultimate game of the season?  Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall Helena Doughty as Jess Tate Victoria Gibson as Alex Morr...

Ashwood City travel to Goodison Park to take on Everton in one of the final games of the season. Off the pitch, however, things turn sour as Sporting Director Chris 'Woody' Woodall is forced to vacate his seat, due to the ongoing issues with Rob Jefferson.  Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall Additional Voices: Joel Emery Directed by: Adam Jarrell  Episode...

Ashwood City take on Tottenham Hotspur under new Interim Head Coach Matt Jansen. Meanwhile, Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan and Sporting Director Chris 'Woody' Woodall explore their options for life in The Championship without in-form prospect Kyle Francis-Clarke. Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall Helena Doughty as Jess Tate Esmonde Cole as KFC Victoria Gibson...

The first match of the season in the post-Van Smit era sees fellow Premier League strugglers West Ham United visit Dartley Park. Will the 'New Manager Bounce' materialise and allow Ashwood City to gain three valuable points? Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan Joel Emery as Dan Watson Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall Helena Doughty as Jess Tate Rhys Tees as Rob Jefferson Lucinda Shaw as Christ...

Following an away defeat to Brighton and Hove Albion, the Ashwood hierarchy put the wheels into motion to try and turn the club's fortunes around. Negotiations with former coach Dan Watson however, hit a bit of a roadblock in the form of new representation for the fan-favourite.  Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall Helena Doughty as Jess Tate Joel Emery as Dan...

As the deal to bring home 'The Prodigal Son' Dan Watson edges closer, Patrick Nolan is A.W.O.L from the club offices. Sporting Director Chris 'Woody' Woodall leads the chase to find the missing Chief Executive. Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall Helena Doughty as Jess Tate Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton Lucinda Shaw as Christ...

Ashwood take on Manchester City at the Etihad Stadium, with an already irritated Patrick Nolan arranging the travel to the game for his fellow board-members; Head of Communications Jess Tate and Sporting Director Chris 'Woody' Woodall.  Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall Helena Doughty as Jess Tate Lance Fuller as Dwight Hayes Additional Voices: Joel Emer...

The Premier League has returned, as Ashwood City host Arsenal.  Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall Esmonde Cole as Howard Jagger Acushla-Tara Kupe as Dr. Rachel Webber Allon Sylvain as Eric Van Smit Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton Helena Doughty as Jess Tate Joel Emery as Dan Watson With thanks to Jon Champion Directed by: Adam Jarrell Episode written by: Joe...

Something is stirring in the night... Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall Helena Doughty as Jess Tate Victoria Gibson as Alex Morrison Additional voices Lucinda Shaw Joel Emery With thanks to Jon Champion Directed by: Adam Jarrell Episode written by: Joel Emery Edited by: Adam Jarrell Executive Producer: Joel Emery WARNING. This podcast contains explicit langua...

In a time of unprecedented government support for businesses, Chief-Executive Patrick Nolan has taken the opportunity to make the most of the tax-payer funded assistance. Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall Lucinda Shaw as Christine Williams Helena Doughty as Jess Tate Additional voices Luke Moore Lynne Shaw Joel Emery Directed by: Adam Jarrell Episode written...

As a nationwide lockdown looms; Patrick, Woody and Jess make a final social outing in attending the birthday party of Arsenal Head Coach Mikel Arteta. Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall Helena Doughty as Jess Tate Lance Fuller as Dwight Hayes With thanks to The Price of Football Podcast Kevin Day Kieran Maguire Guy Kilty Directed by: Joel Emery & Adam Jarrell E...

Football is at a standstill and in an effort to gain some positive online traction; Ashwood City have released a fundraising anthem during Sport Relief mistaking it for Red Nose Day. It's up to Jess Tate to handle the fallout from the controversial song. Helena Doughty as Jess Tate Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall Acushla-Tara Kupe as Dr. Rachel Webber Thoma...

Flying high off the back of a 1-0 win in Wolfsburg in the Europa League Round of 16; the Ashwood City players are taking measures to ensure they avoid being affected by the Coronavirus outbreak. Esmonde Cole as Howard Jagger Adam Jarrell as Kieran Broom Acushla-Tara Kupe as Dr. Rachel Webber Allon Sylvain as Eric van Smit Directed by: Joel Emery Episode written by: Joel Emery   Edited by...

As the authorities prepare their case against Patrick Nolan, old connections provide an opportunity to hinder the prosecution.  Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan Thomas Mitchells as Theo Clinton Rhys Tees as Rob Jefferson Additional voices Nalan Burgess Joel Emery Directed by: Joel Emery Episode written by: Joel Emery   Edited by: Joel Emery Executive Producer: Joel Emery WARNING. This...

Ashwood City set their sights on Norwich and all three points as 19th in the Premier League take on 20th at Carrow Road. Woody however has bumped into an old colleague that could turn the fortunes of the club. Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall Joel Emery as Dan Watson Directed by: Adam Jarrell Episode written by: Joel Emery   Edited by: Adam Jarrell Exec...

Ashwood City are in Basel, Switzerland for the second leg of their Europa League Round of 32 tie. In addition to already trailing 1-0 on aggregate, the side now have to deal with club captain Kieran Broom walking out on the team prior to kick-off. Allon Sylvain as Eric van Smit Acushla-Tara Kupe as Dr Rachel Webber Adam Jarrell as Kieran Broom Esmonde Cole as Howard Jagger Thomas Mitchells as Theo...