The Nativist

Loss. The bad news? Everyone experiences it. The good news? Everyone experiences it.  It’s a universal thread, tying is all together. It’s inevitable, though our individual experiences of it aren’t. We all experience loss, albeit it in different ways, to different degrees, at different times, in different ways.  Loss doesn’t always mean a physical death; sometimes it’s the loss of a job, loss of a...

The people have spoken. I canvassed for what you wanted to hear, and this was one of the requests: how “nothing can be discussed anymore without throwing politics into it” (and truth be told, ironically I talked about politics while talking about how we can’t talk about anything without talking about politics. Sigh). I share some thoughts. I suggest some perspectives. I offer some outlooks. I prop...

In this episode, I share my thoughts on world affairs, particularly Russia's invasion of Ukraine. I offer (possibly surprising) suggestions on how to frame certain issues, and on how we individually/collectively contribute to the issues. Me being me, I ask (likely) uncomfortable yet key questions, and illuminate possible individual/collective blind spots. I comment on the world as it is, and the w...

Part of being a functional, happy, successful, ALIVE human is analyzing, anticipating, and, planning. Part of being a miserable, sad, resentful human is having unmet expectations. So…how do we encourage the former, not the latter? What’s the key ingredient? Expectations (did you expect me to say that?). In this episode, I talk about the sneaky ways expectations can screw with your health, success,...

Life is messy. Life can feel tough. It’s complex and nuanced and uncertain, just like us humans. When we rush to restore comfort, we weaken ourselves, limit ourselves, and invite trouble. What kind of trouble? In what small/big ways are we denying ourselves a full, rich, fulfilling life? How are you possibly contributing to your problems and our problems? What are our possible blind spots? How can...

You might know someone with ADHD. You might have ADHD. You might not even know you have ADHD. In this episode, I dig into my personal experience with getting diagnosed with ADHD later in life (age 25) by two different doctors before realizing WHOA - I’m a textbook example of ADHD. If you’re like me, you maybe have/had a very limited understanding of ADHD and its various symptoms. This episode will...

What does loyalty entail? What should it entail? Loyalty to a partner, to a friend, to a brand, to a vendor, to a family member, to a country, to a cause, to an ideology… As with most topics, it’s nuanced. It can be contextual. It’s tempting to simplify and reduce it, but that often ignores reality and limits us: our understanding, our growth, our relationships, our empathy, our compassion, our pr...

Suddenly being told to rush your “healthy” baby to the ER because those seemingly minor symptoms actually reveal a serious, lifelong condition would unnerve virtually any parent, especially if you’re a first timer. Roman Ternus is one special girl in her own special way (you’ll see what I mean in the intro). She sparkles, she dazzles, she charms, and she inspires. She is full of life and light, un...

This episode has major star power. We’re graced with the presence of Jessica E. Jones, aka IVYWILD: Grammy winner, multi-faceted singer, childhood friend, and light bringer. Possibly most important? She performed for RBG herself. What a claim to fame. Not only does she have the speaking voice of a Disney princess, but she’s an exceptionally articulate, driven, talented, lovely person. In this epis...

In honor of Native American Heritage Month, Effie Hernandez comes on the pod to inform and inspire. Effie is a member of the Shoshone Tribe and works as a multi-cultural coordinator for a community college in Idaho Falls. Though Effie provides great resources and insight for planning your future (especially for Indigenous youth), this isn’t just for teenagers contemplating college. In true Nativis...

Wow. I get into it with this episode. There are a lot of hurting/struggling/frustrated/disgruntled people in the world, and especially in the US. And there are a lot of reasons behind the suffering and discontent - as well as a lot of proposed solutions. There’s also a lot of blaming, criticizing, and side taking. What’s the role of perspective in all of this? What’s the worth of other perspective...

In a world where we're expected to "keep it real" while "keeping up with the (insert entity here)," life gets complicated. Vulnerability and authenticity are buzzwords, but what do they really mean? How do they manifest? We're  advised to be genuine - as long as it's socially acceptable. What does loving and being our true self really look like? Can our "true self" fluctuate? Does being real requi...

Are you a toxic venter or a healthy venter? You may know how important feeling and processing your emotions are. Repressing them just allows them to metastasize and eventually explode in a bigger and uglier way. Venting can help you gain perspective and clarity, and assist you in moving forward and healing. Venting can be necessary. Leaving emotions/frustrations/anger bottled up can be toxic - but...

Leadership is a sweetheart topic. We’re inundated with advice and resources and guidance on being an effective leader. We’re taught to seek to lead, not follow. We’re taught to value leading over following; to respect leaders more than followers. And while there’s merit and value in striving to aim high and lead (in whatever form that takes: in your own life, in a team, etc) there can be just as m...

Leadership. It’s often glorified and discussed, often regarding a formal role, position, or status. How reductive and limiting.  No matter what organization you’re part of, or group you belong to, or title you have/lack - YOU are and can be a leader - at the very least, the leader of your own dang life.  In this episode, I highlight various ways we can lead from where we stand, no matter who we ar...

Do you equate being sweet with being a good person? Do you ever say yes when you want to say no? Do you ever strategically place exclamation points to appear nice and upbeat? Do you ever say you'd love to make plans when you really wouldn't? Do you ever feel like you give give give while others take? Do you find yourself feeling resentful, or passive aggressive? In this episode I talk about how sw...

We’ve heard it before: changing the world starts within, with us individually. In this episode, I talk about how connecting first to ourselves, and then to others: heightens our happiness and sense of meaning and fulfillment strengthens our relationships nurtures our understanding of self and others lengthens our lives (it’s science, baby) clears the layers blocking connection to others lessens di...

In this solo episode, I talk divorce in its broadest sense. Not just the dissolution of a marriage, but the “conscious uncoupling” (great term, Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin!) from anything that no longer serves you: one-sided friendships, toxic habits, regressive thought patterns, unhealthy practices, stagnant jobs, outgrown partnerships, etc. I suggest helpful questions to ask yourself to eff...

In this second part of my Indigenous Voices series, I spotlight Sequoia Dance-Leighton, an enrolled member of the Shoshone-Bannock tribes, a descendant of the Assiniboine Red Bottom clan, and a resident of the Nimiipuu (Nez Perce) land. With a bachelor's degree in human development and a master's degree in social and cultural pedagogy, she is now pursuing a PhD in cultural studies and social thoug...

In a world of worthy causes, the indigenous voice is often drowned out. This series aims to illuminate it. If you're interested at all in being a more informed and respectful human, this is a goldmine. Elise Blaser returns to share with us her indigenous perspective from a cultural, historical, and personal standpoint. She tells us about growing up in both Canada and the US while having both nativ...

Despair. I sure as hell have felt it (I don’t say that glibly - I mean it). Chances are you’ve also felt it (to whatever degree). If you haven’t (yet), you likely know someone who has/is feeling it.  It’s part of the human experience, so let’s respect it, and let’s talk about it: for ourselves and for others. If you’re seeking a message of hope, this is for Y O U. In this episode, I open up and te...

This is for you if: you’re always tired - no matter how much sleep you get; you have more questions than answers regarding your health/body; you’ve ever experienced chronic illness/pain; you feel like you’re battling your metabolism; you have lingering health questions that are never quite satisfactorily answered; you feel OK now but want to feel as great as possible in 10, 20, 30 years; you want...

This episode is not only per request, but it's also an area I've specifically wanted to cover. If you want help setting/respecting boundaries, this is for you. If you seek insight on interacting with humans - in whatever capacity - this is for you. If you desire guidance on living a more effective and fulfilled life, this is for you. In this solo episode, I discuss what happens when we/others don'...

The latest installment of The Nativist’s addiction series is a gut punch. My incredible friend Jessie Enander shares the heartbreaking - and tragically relevant - story of how painkillers destroyed her best friend’s life. Jessie talks about how her friend, a stay-at-home mother, fell prey to the horrors of addiction. Jessie describes the addiction’s progression and symptoms, and how terrifyingly e...

Today’s episode is moving, it’s enlightening, it’s illuminating, it’s inspiring… It’s as remarkable as the woman who shares it: Mindy Cervantes​. Mindy candidly and compassionately shares her story of being married to someone addicted to alcohol. She takes us through how it began, how it progressed, and how it resolved. She outlines what steps she took on her end to empower and heal herself, so sh...