The Luke and Pete Show

Ever wondered what a society run by the least qualified individuals would look like? Well, that's sort of what The Luke and Pete Show is, isn't it? And it's called a kakistocracy. Anyway, we're diving straight into this episode with talk about the nuances of the Jagger family, and rapidly moving into Maplin-esque territory by lamenting the loss of electronics giant Dick Smith. Elsewhere there's ch...

We're back, just like you said we would be. Let's get straight into it, shall we? A man enters the Guinness Book of World Records in a way that must surely mean he's tired of living, we discover a land beneath the sea that we never knew existed, someone directly related to an Arctic Monkey gets in touch, and Pete lets us in to the nightmare that is his subconscious. Elsewhere, there's emails on ti...

Good morning and welcome to this episode of The Luke and Pete Show, you're very welcome. Make yourselves comfortable. This time around, Pete kicks off proceedings by furnishing us with some Japanese pornographic film titles translated into English. It's actually funnier than you'd expect. After that we take in subjects as diverse as Duran Duran, saving animals from extinction, Ian Botham and, in a...

This time around, we hear from a listener who became involved in an ill-advised tete-a-tete with The Shield's Kenny Johnson, with quite spectacular results, learn of the tallest free-standing structure in the UK (Hint: It's not in London), and marvel at a truly horrific tree surgery injury. Meanwhile, there's Tony Hawk, storm chasing, frontmen with the best mic skills and much, much more. All pack...

Congratulations on your download! Your all-new Luke and Pete Show will contain the following: White Chocolate Chicken Shops Fish n Chips Sweaty Armpits How to assemble a band for a wedding Warning: Results may vary, do not listen to while operating heavy machinery. To prescribe us a higher dose:  hello@lukeandpeteshow.com ***Please take the time to rate and review us on iTunes or wherever you...

As promised, Pete delivers (sort of) on his Conspiracy Theory Special chat from shows gone by. What we mean by that is that he found a list of them in a magazine and would quite like to read them out.  And the excitement only ramps up from there - in the second half of the show both Luke and Pete get tucked in to a tube of space food that their pal brought back from Russia. I mean, they have...

Finally, finally, FINALLY, Pilot Neil returns. We don't know where he's been or what he's been doing but the most important thing is that he's back. We weren't angry, just disappointed. Also on your all-new edition of The Luke and Pete Show - tales from Bruges, the most beautiful/perverted city in Belgium, pinball machines, elaborate record packaging and the time Pete was attacked by a police dog...

Howdy everyone! We're back in our respective saddles and looking to artfully waste another half an hour of everyones' time with some more pith and nonsense. Huzzah! Pete's been to Korea and so joyfully regales us with tales of his travels, including of course the eating of octopus. A textbook Korean pursuit if ever there was one. Elsewhere, there's plenty of your emails including job interview cha...

The Luke and The Pete are getting to the age where they need to think about going grey and what that means for them. Apparently, Anthony Kiedis of Red Hot Chili Peppers takes affirmative action on that front. Who knew? Also, there's a revisiting of the 'posh people getting angry' trope, and we discover (via a listener) a man who can literally make a sharp knife out of just about anything at all, i...

A police helicopter has been keeping Luke from watching TV. Pete's more interested in those little finger trick skateboards you used to get back in the day. What were they called? Did you ever become good at using one? If so, let us know. Meanwhile, we hear of a man who died by having a tortoise dropped on his bald head, and another, separate, man who had a rum old time working as Liam Neeson's st...

Rejoice at the return of your favourite podcast featuring two men that know nothing about anything talking for half an hour. Pete's been to the seaside, and this time he managed to avoid getting sunburnt! He celebrates by talking for a bit about pants. We then move on to the well-trodden subjects of haircuts, how much one should pay, and finish off with a good dose of British awkwardness, somethin...

Why is Sir Paul McCartney so odd? And, while we're at it, why is Ringo Starr also so odd? Any advice greatly appreciated.  This time around, we break bread over the differences between the Japanese and Korean languages, marvel at possibly the worst job interview experience of all time, hear a Mencarta, and find out that, in the 70s, people that used to go door-to-door selling spider monkeys....

We start this episode as every podcast should begin - with Tom Jones impressions. After that we keep up the music theme by finding out that Pete has been hobnobbing with Franz Ferdinand's Alex Kapranos and bonding with him over Graceland. Once we finally get past the name-drop section of the show there's time for an email from Brunei, some more weird baby names, a discussion about LiveJasmine, som...

Tune in this time around for Luke and Pete reminiscing about puncture repair kits, before marvelling at how strange and unreliable the passing of time and capturing of memories can be. Don't worry though, we get on to much more firm and familiar ground shortly after that as Pete waxes lyrical about how he hates leg day at the gym. What's more, you beautiful listeners step up to the plate with tale...

We start today's proceedings by talking about a one hour documentary on Japanese trains, including men fashioning a light fitting 'the old fashioned way', whatever that means. It's not as boring as it sounds though, and before you know it we've moved on to camel urine anyway, so that's a plus. Elsewhere on your all-new episode of The Luke and Pete Show, there's more sodium-based tom foolery, actor...

We open proceedings this time around with a tale about a stork that ended up costing a charity a £2000 phone bill, and things get slowly more bizarre from there. The two main takeaways are, well, er, takeaways and names it is absolutely impossible to call a baby in 2018. We round this entire derring-do off with a good look at Jackass-inspired injuries and how they're not particularly conducive to...

We think it's episode 79, but we're not sure, and Pete is still sunburnt. It's his own fault. It's sent him a bit mad, and one minute we're discussing new show ideas, and the next we're talking about bringing a different animal into the studio every week. Heady stuff. On today's show we solve the great Cadbury's discontinued chocolate bar riddle, find out about eggs that haven't had a shell formed...

Straight off the bat, The Pete is accusing The Luke of wearing Bermuda shorts, an accusation that shouldn't be taking lightly. After that we hear of Peter Crouch and a kids' illusion that confuses The Pete to this day. There's time for actors that have appeared in one movie and then never again, the pleasing sound of things hitting bald mens' heads, and another love letter to Anthony Bourdain. And...

The Pete is back from working the Isle of Wight Festival and is sunburnt. He's also sporting a rather snazzy Transformers tattoo. And, having managed to perform a bungee jump and survive it with both retinas intact, he's also in a chipper mood. He and The Luke discuss more weird sports team names, find out about a 19th century beer flood, hear of a school brawl involving over 100 people and an ira...

Highlander actor Christopher Lambert is apparently almost blind. Did you know that? Why would you, eh? Luke certainly didn't, not until Pete told him. Yes, the boys are back and they're talking yet more nonsense, which let's face it is the very thing they do best. There's music chat, including Neil Young, Van Morrison and Pete's baes The Darkness. Did you know he almost joined their five-a-side te...

Moore and Donaldson get back in their easy chairs, light a pipe each and start ruminating on the world around them once more, in episode 75 of your Luke and Pete Show. This time around there is time to talk about physical health, leading on to the fact that Pete has a charity bungee jump lined up. In a somewhat related matter, chat progresses to American candy, including Pete's favourites and a te...

As the title suggests, in episode 74 we hear about one of the more bizarre habits adopted by people in England in the 17th century. But before that there's plenty to get our teeth into, including a new jingle or two, a Mencarta entry for the ages and a man having a chip implanted into his hand with mixed results. There's also plenty more where that came from - we revisit sex education classes, Kat...

The chaps are back, and on your particularly chaotic latest edition of The Luke and Pete Show, we have a truly eclectic range of topics to discuss.  There's Fathers4Justice, more Anthony Bourdain chat, craft ale, more intellectual property theft from our listeners, and a revisiting of the white-hot National Treasures debate. And if that wasn't enough, we also find time to chat about two of th...

Rejoice, because The Luke and The Pete are back in their hotseats and shooting the proverbial once again. This time around there's the great 'compressed air v jet fuel' debate, more flat earth nonsense and a an honourable mention for the late Anthony Bourdain. Elsewhere, your emails include a horrific tale about a ride at Disneyland Paris gone wrong, a boy wetting himself on stage at school, and m...

We're back. Pete's brought along a new jingle or two and Luke has brought along himself. This time around, there's a bit of film chat (Alex Garland's Annihilation and Woody Harrelson's Lost in London Live), a kid that keeps fainting (not Luke or Pete), and today's musical offering is brought to you by Geri Halliwell and the Wu Tang Clan (separately). Meanwhile, a listener gets in touch to offer a...