The Low Ceiling

Alpha Dog , the chilling true story of toxic masculinity, Justin Timberlake's acting career, and short-man syndrome. Jon and Pri discuss One Tree Hill cameos, whether crime is cool or not, and the top five Short Kings. Number four might surprise you!

On today's episode of F*ck it! We're doing it live! Jon and Pri chat about Ocean's Twelve: America's least favourite heist film. We talk about subverting the audience's expectations, Soderbergh's incredible career, and the Friends episode where they all get addicted to OxyContin and rob Central Perk. How many podcasts do you know hosted by fifty year old men?

Morb me up! Pri defends Morbius to the death and will duel anyone who speaks ill of it. We pitch another Blade 1, question how vampire bats work, and plan to retire Andrew Garfield from acting.

We discuss a film that will make you wish Y2K happened: Gone in 60 Seconds. Jon expresses his unabashed love while Pri is less kind. We discuss Indian traffic, the scorching chemistry between Delroy Lindo and Nicholas Cage, and note Angelina Jolie's hair (and entire career). We're waiting to be plucked so you can blast with us to Palm Springs, instantly feeling better about being you!

Yes, Satan? Ace Ventura: Pet Detective is a true American classic: it's poorly aged, football obsessed, and launched the career of a superstar. We talk about how football works, Mr. Shickadance, and the weird noir tone shifts in this movie. Take it with a grain of salt, it's a disgusting habit!

**STRONG CONTENT WARNING** We talk about an absolutely insane film by cinema's saddest man. There's unintentional fox comedy, half-baked opinions, and a drill right through a man's leg. Chaos reigns as we tackle ANTICHRIST.

Master Gardener! Climate change! The only podcast that will reference Step Up: Revolution in the same breath as Paul Schrader! Jon and Pri get super serious and chat about the Schrader trilogy, hopefulness, forgiveness, and surreality. Stick your face deep in this episode and find the capacity to forgive us for acting like we can actually seriously critique a movie!

We turn our trenchant critical eye to one of the worst crimes of the 2008 financial crisis: Sex and the City, the movie. Cover your naked bodies in sushi and get your very own Louis Vuitton bag, we dive into a film hellbent on ruining the legacy of a classic TV show.

**SPOILER ALERT** Jon, fresh off his European travels, dunks on Egyptologists for wasting their stupid careers and gives a succinct review of the entire country of Italy. We move on to discuss Beau is Afraid and its reviews, Ari Aster's career, and how many movies are actually stuffed inside just this one. Remember, the penis is also a monster.

We close out the Lawrencerate with his feature debut: Constantine, the smouldering, tantric exorcist. We discuss his great apartment, cat slander, and becoming the pod-o-sphere's number one Rachel Weisz fan club. Holy water?!?!

And you thought our British accents were good! Guess again! Red Sparrow gives us the opportunity to bust out the Russian, trash the contextless nature of this film, and talk about the bird content this film was dearly missing.

We examine cinema's most staid love triangle and how it found itself in the midst of a bombing. Our patience was tested and we guarantee that yours will be as well as we discuss one of the most critically derided Baysien objets des artes ever: Pearl Harbor.

We talk about The Butterfly Effect and both of us threaten to butterfly effect the other, The Kutch was actually good in this, and we make light of a distastefully dark classic. Listen along or change the past so this show never existed.

A film with so many faces it'll make you want to throw your phone in a garbage compacter. What was Jamie Kennedy anyways? And what's sticking in Gene Hackman's craw? We answer all of these questions (with help from our sponser, The Patriot Act) and more while we chat about Enemy of the State.

In an epic episode for an epic film we provide the definitive analysis of Orlando Bloom's successes and failures, Pri notes Baldwin's mask, Jon skewers Johnny Depp's penchant for silly hats, and we flawlessly recreate the incredible score of Kingdom of Heaven. God wills it!

Pri gets heated about Shrek and hates a hologram too much. We do the philosophical work this movie refuses to do and Jon gets triggered by Will Smith eating a pie. This episode is a beautiful symphony of nothingness as we discuss I Robot.

Finally! A film for the people, by the people, of the people. Which size daddy are you? No spoilers but we never get around to it! Jon alienates most of our audience and Pri has a scorching take about cancer. Waste the good surprise on us as we tackle Big Daddy.

We talk about the "most offensive" film of 2016 and express questionable opinions about it. Pri is back in the Succubus Zone while Jon cruised conspiracy websites to talk about triangles. The effort:length ratio is put to the test due to Refn-esque pauses while we discuss The Neon Demon.

Travel across the galaxy as we explore Ra's hand powers, set fire to the life's work of Egyptologists, and stoke the boiling cesspit that is "Hieroglyphs Twitter". We're stepping through the gate so give our regards to King Tut.

X3 brought the first X-boot to an inauspicious end. Full of potential and lacking execution, much like this podcast. Pri throws a spanner in the works with her top 5, Jon hates post credit scenes, the phrase "I'm the Juggernaut bitch!" is uttered thrice, and Rogue can touch whoever she wants now. Rise like a phoenix!

We review and preview the 90th and 95th Academy Award winners and picks respectively. We invite DDL to dinner but worry about his conduct, Jon gives his thoughts on Blonde (unfortunately), and Pri confesses her deep love for Glass Onion: A Knives Out Story. The House of Woodcock has arrived on the red carpet for an award's season that's sure to be forgettable.

Pri would have been prowling for succubii in high school while Jon had bad taste in music and loved Alpha Dog, or any movie starring Emile Hirsch. Monistat and Vagisil are back and we're breaking down Jennifer's Body, live from Devil's Kettle.

On this episode Cricket Corner heats up, Johnny Depp hinders a film's quality because he's cinema's lamest opium user, and there are many flawless British accents in play. Truly From Hell.

We talk about Jarhead, a movie Pri claims is camp then learns to love. Jon hates "Ray" but also has dubious opinions about the works of Sam Mendes and gives a harrowing account of his enjoyment of the classic white person Oscar bait "American Beauty".  We're burning shitters, admiring Jake's booty, and playing the bugle with our goddamn mouths.