The Human Intimacy Podcast

How to Have Hard Conversations Without Hurting Your Relationship The Human Intimacy Podcast With Dr. Kevin Skinner and MaryAnn Michaelis, LCSW Why do difficult conversations so often leave us feeling more disconnected? Most couples don't struggle because they aren't communicating. They struggle because their conversations aren't creating the understanding, emotional safety, and connection they des...

Will These Triggers Ever Go Away? Understanding Healing After Betrayal You have been working on healing. You have gained insight, experienced better days, and perhaps felt closer to your partner. Then a familiar place, an anniversary, or an unexpected moment brings the pain rushing back. Does this mean you haven’t made progress? Will these triggers always be part of your life? In this episode of t...

I Thought I’d Feel Better by Now: Understanding Trauma After Betrayal Months—or even years—have passed since discovering the betrayal. You expected to feel better by now, yet the anger, anxiety, intrusive thoughts, or emotional overwhelm remain. Some days, they may feel stronger than ever. You may wonder, “Why am I still struggling? Is something wrong with me?” In this episode of the Human Intimac...

Healing After Multiple Affairs: How to Get Unstuck and Move Forward Episode Summary “My partner had multiple affairs, and I’m having a hard time healing. What can I do to make progress?” In this episode of the Human Intimacy Podcast, Dr. Kevin Skinner and MaryAnn Michaelis, LCSW, respond to a listener’s question with compassion and practical guidance. They explore why repeated betrayals and new di...

Addiction or Choice? Understanding Sexual Compulsivity, Responsibility, and Recovery When sexual betrayal occurs, one of the most difficult questions is: Was this an addiction, or was it a choice? For betrayed partners, that question is rarely just intellectual. It can quickly become deeply personal: If my partner chose this behavior, does that mean they chose it over me? Was I not enough? Was the...

Betrayal Overcompensation: From Image Management to Authentic Recovery After betrayal, one of the most difficult questions is often: How do I know what is real? Sometimes betrayal is accompanied by withdrawal. A partner becomes distant, disconnected, less affectionate, or emotionally unavailable. But sometimes the opposite happens. The person who is hiding sexual behaviors may become more helpful,...

What Is the Voice of the Betraying Spouse? After betrayal, the person who caused the harm may wonder whether they still have the right to express their feelings, disagree, set boundaries, or acknowledge when something hurts. At the same time, the betrayed partner needs space for their pain, anger, and trauma to be heard and understood. In this episode of the Human Intimacy Podcast, Dr. Kevin Skinn...

When Your Partner Won’t Engage in Healing: Finding Clarity When Values and Recovery No Longer Align Episode Summary What do you do when your partner refuses to discuss the betrayal, avoids recovery, or no longer seems to share the values that once defined your relationship? The uncertainty can become its own source of pain. You may feel trapped between pursuing answers, walking on eggshells, and r...

Betrayal Withdrawal: When Sexual Secrecy Creates Emotional Abandonment Episode Summary What happens when a partner senses that something is wrong but cannot explain the growing distance? They may reach for connection, initiate affection, or ask what has changed—only to be told that everything is fine. Over time, repeated rejection and denial can cause them to question their perceptions and wonder...

Why Is Healing Taking So Long? Navigating Trust, Setbacks, and Different Paces After Betrayal Healing after betrayal rarely follows a straight path. Even when both partners are trying, progress can feel slow, uneven, and difficult to recognize. In this listener-question episode, Dr. Kevin Skinner and MaryAnn Michaelis explain why recovery requires more than simply stopping the behavior. Lasting he...

After Betrayal: Supporting Individual Healing and Relational Repair Episode Summary Learning the full truth about a betrayal can be an important step, but it does not immediately restore safety or connection. Even after disclosure, the betrayed partner may continue experiencing fear, intrusive thoughts, hypervigilance, disrupted sleep, and uncertainty. These are understandable trauma responses—not...

Between Discovery and Disclosure: Seeking Truth Without Causing More Harm Episode Summary After betrayal is discovered, the need for answers can feel immediate and overwhelming. The betrayed partner is trying to understand their reality, while the partner who broke trust may be unprepared to provide a complete, coherent, and honest account. When these conversations happen without preparation, coup...

Betrayal Trauma Is Not Codependency Episode Summary For years, partners who have experienced sexual betrayal have sometimes been labeled as codependent or “co-addicted.” But is that an accurate way to understand what happens after betrayal? In this episode of the Human Intimacy Podcast, Dr. Kevin Skinner and MaryAnn Michaelis explore the important difference between betrayal trauma and codependenc...

Betrayal Rage: How to Regulate Overwhelming Emotions Without Abandoning Yourself Episode Summary After betrayal, many people experience a level of anger or rage that feels completely unfamiliar. They may yell, lash out, throw things, or feel an intense desire to make their partner understand the depth of their pain. When the moment passes, shame often follows: Who am I becoming? Why can’t I contro...

Should You Do a 90-Day Sex Fast? Understanding the Purpose, Pitfalls, and Path to Deeper Intimacy Episode Summary Is a 90-day sex fast the right choice for your relationship? In this episode of the Human Intimacy Podcast, Dr. Kevin Skinner and MaryAnn Michaelis explore one of the most frequently discussed—and often misunderstood—recommendations in betrayal recovery and unwanted sexual behavior tre...

Guilt After Betrayal: How Remorse Can Lead to Relationship Repair Episode Summary What role does guilt play after betrayal? Although guilt is often viewed as something negative, it can become an important force for accountability, empathy, and healing. Unlike shame—which says, “I am a mistake”—guilt recognizes, “I made a mistake, and my actions caused harm.” In this episode, Dr. Kevin Skinner and...

Why Do I Still Feel Stuck? Understanding the Hidden Barriers to Healing After Betrayal Episode Summary One of the most common questions betrayed partners ask is, "Why do I still feel stuck?" Despite reading books, attending therapy, participating in support groups, and listening to countless podcasts, many people feel like they aren't making the progress they expected. In this episode, Dr. Kevin S...

Differentiation: Staying Connected Without Losing Yourself Episode Summary Healthy relationships require both deep connection and a strong sense of self. In this episode, Dr. Kevin Skinner and MaryAnn Michaelis explore the concept of differentiation—the ability to remain emotionally connected to your partner while maintaining your own identity, values, emotions, and personal responsibility. The di...

How to Deal with Getting Cheated On: The First Steps Toward Healing After Betrayal Podcast Summary What do you do after discovering your partner has cheated? Where do you even begin? In this episode of the Human Intimacy Podcast, Dr. Kevin Skinner and MaryAnn Michaelis tackle one of the most painful questions a person can ask: How do I deal with getting cheated on? Rather than offering quick fixes...

Disclosure Is the Beginning, Not the End Summary Many couples assume that once disclosure, impact letters, and emotional restitution are complete, healing should naturally follow. Yet many still find themselves feeling disconnected and wondering why they continue to struggle. In this episode, Dr. Kevin Skinner and MaryAnn Michaelis explain why disclosure is not the finish line but the foundation f...

How Do We Create Safety in a Relationship? 10 Keys to Rebuilding Trust and Connection In this episode of the Human Intimacy Podcast, Dr. Kevin Skinner and MaryAnn Michaelis explore one of the most important questions couples can ask themselves: “How do we create safety in a relationship?” Drawing from attachment theory, betrayal trauma recovery, and clinical experience, they discuss how safety is...

How to Strengthen Your Relationship: The Questions Every Couple Should Be Asking Podcast Summary Relationships rarely fail because couples stop caring. More often, they struggle because they stop asking the questions that create understanding, connection, and growth. In this episode of the Human Intimacy Podcast, Dr. Kevin Skinner and MaryAnn Michaelis explore the questions every couple should be...

Affair, Addiction, or Something More? Understanding the Story Behind Sexual Betrayal Summary In this episode of the Human Intimacy Podcast, Dr. Kevin Skinner and MaryAnn Michaelis explore one of the most confusing and emotionally overwhelming questions couples face after betrayal: Was this “just” an affair, or is there something deeper happening? Together, they discuss the critical importance of u...

Confident Conversations: Teaching Children Healthy Intimacy, Connection, and Emotional Safety (with Dan Oakes) Summary In this episode of the Human Intimacy Podcast, Dr. Kevin Skinner sits down with Dan Oakes to discuss parenting, healthy sexuality, emotional connection, and prevention in today’s digital culture. Dan shares insights from his new book, Confident Conversations: Teaching Your Childre...

Emotional Safety After Betrayal: Understanding Emotions, Trauma, and Relationship Healing Podcast Summary In this episode of the Human Intimacy Podcast, Dr. Kevin Skinner and MaryAnn Michaelis explore the connection between emotional safety, betrayal trauma, emotional regulation, and relationship healing after infidelity or sexual betrayal. Many individuals struggling with betrayal trauma, anxiety...