The Horny Housewife

Hey freak-a-leeks this Mondays episode is packed with fire sexy tips you'll surely want to use later! Im starting the episode off talking about kinky love-making, what exactly deems sex as "kinky" and how can I get some more of it?! From spanking, to blindfolding, using ice, and being tied up- Ive got some ideas for you and your SO. - what if my partner isn't into that-how do we get the fire going...

Happy Monday Freaky Fam, today Im lightly toasting a listener question, because like Ive always said we keep it 100 here, so sometimes we need to realize when we are the ones being the problem in our relationship. Todays topic is "what defines us as 'being good In bed?'" spoiler alert- its not doing anything your partner asks just to please. its much more than that-and also less. This months audio...

Today we talk about the lady parts, the female body, the female orgasm. Discussing the different types of orgasms, the TWO orgasms gaps- one desperately needing to be closed, stunning statistics about orgasms, and what you can do to maximum her chances, and both of your pleasure. spoiler alert** including pro-tip how to climax together, and how to know how to touch her in the way she likes STAT. T...

Get out your fucking notepads and I'm not kidding in the slightest. IM BACK freaky-family, and today I'm about to tell you the gods honest truth, as to why your spouse isn't fucking you more. Maybe they hate your guts, maybe they are just seriously tired, maybe they are numb inside from raising soul sucking children IYKYK. Im here to give insight, to offer solutions, and address 3 listeners specif...

HEY HORNY FAM, Happy Monday, October is over can you believe it?! The Holidays are on the way & Ive got my thoughts on Christmas lights and I think we are a nation divided, or at least a household. FYI Im setting the record straight this week on if I send nudes/video chat with listeners and we are diving deep answering your burning questions- Im not one to blush but this episode had me squirming;...

Consider this the first of many "Lessons in Getting Laid", I , The Horny Housewife, and giving my opinion, and hot tips on how to better warm up your partner for the deed; slow motion with meeee. Im working in some burning listener questions, one about helping his wife open up after a traumatic incident, the other is struggling in her relationship as her boyfriend hasn't been intimate with her in...

~moody monday~ I went to the MGK concert this week and am telling you I made some bad mom club choices. Lived to tell you. Briefly Im bitching about my Karen neighbors but don't get it twisted I'm here today to answer the mens listener questions, one listener wants to know the real deal about being a show-er not a grow-er and spoiler alert I don't think we give two many f*cks; but I'm here with a...

The Horny Housewife here with- drum roll please- Jeff Abraham aka CEO of Promescent, the OG behind helping men LAST LONGER IN BED! Today we are discussing all things sex, the bullshit stigma around P.E. and about whats available to help the cause. (that won't numb you and your partner!!) Jeff has amassed incredible wealth in helping men AND women have better sex, and his story is WILD. Tune in to...

Who is the Horny Housewife ? MOODY MONDAY here and I Jordyn am pouring my big beating heart out telling you why I do the things I do. Im giving YOU some more insight on..ME. Today we are catching up on life, normalizing life being a cock-block, telling internet trolls on my most recent Tik Tok we don't give two fucks about their opinion, and I'm helping you understand how the Horny Housewife came...

This week horny fam Im back and bringing you PART 2 Two girls One BF -audio erotica version- and I really gave you my all lovers. I hope you're proud and aroused! Its def getting steamy between Sarah, Casey and ze boyfriend bc Casey is giving back door entry you are gunnnnnnna wannnnna hear this shit. (NSFW duh) Before we get all hott and bothered I'm discussing the relation between getting flower...

Todays episode Im joined with the co- host of The Raspy Rundown Podcast, and host of A-List with Alexandra, Alexandra Bellusci! Currently in LA working at SUR ( cough cough vanderpump rules), by way of Miami, Alex is talking with myself about what it takes to date in los angeles, youtubers going through women like underwear, careers, confidence, and pursuing WHAT YOU WANT! Its 2021 and a man isn't...

Have you had a HELL OF A WEEKEND in a not fun way?! I'm here to tell you its in the stars baby, these placements got me messed up! That and my husbands love for our pussy cat princess, I feel like I should be the only pu$$y in his life quite honestly and I'm ready to talk about it. Also lets remind men we can have yummy sex and not get off and its not the end of the f*cking world. Men I wanted to...

Lets have a convo about what watering your marriage looks like, beyond all the cliches, and into the reality of the sometimes having to have uncomfortable moments. Im letting you in and telling you the things I struggle with in my own marriage, and some tips on how to FIGHT FAIR; believe me I am no saint but these tips do f*cking work and Im here to tell you WHY AND HOW! I also will relieve you of...

Standing up, Spooning, Reverse cowgirl, the Love Seat, the Butterfly THE LIST GOES ONNNN. Im back and giving you my lovely commentary and play by play of ten superior sex positions and I'm telling you the pros and cons of each situation, the best way to achieve orgasm, and getting creative with the positions. If you would like to skip past me talking shit about my neighbors skip to 7:33. =P . xoxo...

Hello horny people, this Monday I bring you some fun, interesting, and disturbing content. First things first were going over YOUR answers, and my own to "what makes a person appear to be good/freaky-leeky in bed." We all can assume a good kisser up top means a good kisser down bottom...but sometimes we get a disappointing surprise. From humor and confidence to a bulge in your pants and having hot...

Hey y'all, Jordyn here with quite the catch up! I havent had a cocktail in a week -the CLARITY. Have I entered hot girl summer, or is that a big fat lie. Summer is almost over, so you know what that means; #rushtok. Let me tell you, I found kingxcodi and my life is complete. I dont need anything more, just marijuana and his reenactment of sorority bitches with a twang. I have two little story time...

Im bAAAAck and so excited to over share with you all the things; from my boobs to my first Tenga purchase, and a couple of toxic tips. You will most likely REALLY enjoy the first story time in todays episode (there are two !!) because its about the PTSD I acquired from my husband having a wet dream NEXT TO ME. I hope you all get a little giggle from this exploitation of my now trauma. Last but not...

Im back and with the man of the hour, Daddy Derrik, his first and last appearance coming in hott to tell you the fucking truth! He's an Aquarius so I promise he has no issue telling you like he sees it. Tune in hear to my naughty answers, and then daddy's as he gives us some insight into what men really think about queef-ing, and if all men are 'dogs'. Happy Monday Horny Fam!

Hi horny family, for all the men with dating profiles I have an awesome sauce tip for you to really AMP up the amount of right swipes; if you have the criteria that is. Also women, single, divorced, what the fuck ever I have some mens music taste decoding to enlighten you on. From country to emo screamo I got you. I decide to be bitter and do a ballad to my ex's briefly stating my thoughts on that...

Im here and this one is a fucking RIDE...first its a story time of a CRAZY ass man who physically attacked me in the Houston IAH airport, its weird, its horrifying, and it happened to lucky ol me lol. I super unfortunately blackout and get on the topic of hemmoroids and I just go for it , Im MENTION-ing IT ALL, what to do if the men have one, or what to do if we ever do (we never do men we never d...

Lets talk about how much were getting it in.. How much sex are married people REALLY having? Im back horny fam, First things first I had to vent about some recent pop culture; why is Oliva Rodrigo is so much hotter than Tswift, why "Bennifer" doesn't sit well with me and why the Patreon got the 86. Then we go deeper, Im asking questions and peeling back the layers that is "a married persons sex li...

Im back this week with a recap of what the fuck is up, my thirst omegle self, and have a bunch of feedback from YOU ALL about what "wife material" looks like!! I asked men and women what their POV on the topic was, and of course I let you know my opinion on how to be "your best wife version", so he takes you seriously, and not like a one night stand. 

Drake said it first; and we didn't know how we felt, thought maybe a little snotty..but NOPE hell naw, he is was right NO NEW FRIENDS. Jordyn is here to tell you the storytime of a lifetime. Twilight zone meets Bad girls club, Jordyn experienced a "Class A Looney Bitch" and wants to tell you all the things including a universal lesson in perspective; stop comparing yourself to other women on the i...

Im sure Im not the only one who has scrolled their nudes next to a person on the plane, or am I? Speaking of nudes, we have a mini trauma story of the time my nudes were leaked....at my place of work; a story that organically presented itself this episode and come on 'editing it out 'is for the weak. This episode I am catching you up not only with my new found love of anal orgasms, but with some s...

Hey Horny Fam, this week its all things double standards. What exactly constitutes being hypocritical in the relationship/marriage? Do you trip out when your man says its boys night, is he giving you a hard time when you say your going out with ur gal pal slutty-suzy ? Does that make one of you feel insecure and is it justified? What if your person has cheated on you before, does that excuse being...