The Healthy Compulsive Project

If you've ever wanted to tell people or the world to shut up, back off, and quite pressuring you, you may have experienced Demand Resistance. This can be effective, but in some cases it might mean that you don't get your emotional needs met. Understanding what motivates you to protest, rebel or go on strike is an essential step in learning to use resistance skillfully. 

Take a moment to step back and look at the big picture of your life. Too often we lose track and lose our way, allowing defenses, habits, and behavioral avoidance to take us away from what's important. This may be most true of those with obsessive-compulsive personality disorder--whose intense drive can take them off course more quickly than other disorders. As even the APA's Diagnostic and Statis...

Letting go and giving up are near enemies: one is healthy while the other might try to look like it's healthy, but really isn't. Letting go frees us to pursue more fulfilling ways of living, while giving up causes depression. Join us for a discussion of the differences and how to come out on the better side. 

We're all equipped to hold on to the things that ground our lives and give them meaning. But that tool is too often enlisted in ways that do neither. Too often we hold onto rules, money and time in ways that make our minds crowded and noisy, and prevent us from letting in the things that really feel good. Join me in a discussion of psychological hoarding, the obsessive-compulsive tendency that run...

The effects of shame can be seen all around us--largely in people's attempts to avoid it. If not confronted directly, shame can lead us to either withdraw, or to compensate with achievement, virtue or perfectionism. None of which work. Join us for this exploration of one of the most destructive emotions we experience, and find a better way to handle it. 

The obsessive-compulsive personality can make you rigid, or it can be enlisted for healthy change. Fixed mindset can get you stuck while growth mindset can help you utilize its predilection for mastery. This episode lays bare the ongoing battle between the two and the unrecognized allegiance to fixed mindset. It also offers suggestions about how to make sure that growth mindset wins the fight. 

We all like to be right. But our need to be right can get us into wrong because it can lead to self-deception and rationalization. The more convinced you are that your thinking and intuitions are right, the more likely it is that you're wrong. Join me as I question what it means to be certain, and explore why the answer to being certain is to question. 

Believing that we are somehow insufficient often leads us to work too hard, try too hard and think too hard. Enough of that. This episode explores the impact this belief has on us and how we can change that perspective. 

Getting help for perfectionism, control issues, work addiction, and obsessive-compulsive personality disorder (OCPD) isn't easy, but it can be life-changing. Having some idea of what types of treatment are available, and how to best use your time once you get into therapy can make it easier to find you way in, and to make it more effective. This two-part episode includes "What is the Best Psychoth...

What if you had been taken over by a part of your personality, a part of your personality that was meant to help you, but had become a tyrant? Join us for an interview with "Obsessive-Compulsive," also known as OCom, as we explore how to make the best use of this driven part of you. Playful, yet at the same time serious, this episode describes an example of parts work, experiential, psychological...

How comfortable you feel with people can affect whether personality traits such as perfectionism and a need for order and control are used in a healthy or unhealthy way. Join us for an exploration of how these two aspects of personality affect each other, citing research and a case example. 

Guilt complexes can be limiting, disturbing, and suffocating. But they can also keep us out of trouble. Join us for an exploration of how to make your guilt complex more adaptive and less oppressive, while learning one of the newest and most powerful techniques in psychotherapy.  

Ever wonder how you got to be who you are? And what you would need to do to change? The answer is not as simple as it's often made out to be. Join us for this episode of The Healthy Compulsive Project Podcast as we explore the deeper dynamics of personality development. 

The need to turn chaos into order is one of the deepest narratives of the obsessive-compulsive personality. Based on an ancient story found in many of the world's cultures, it can lead to a meaningful life, or a life filled with demands and frustrations. Awareness of this constantly running background program can help us to make better decisions about when to fight and when to let go. 

Self-compassion has now been shown to be very effective in raising self-worth without the dangers that perfectionism can cause. Having compassion for our shortcomings actually helps us to be more effective and more successful. Join us for this episode on how to achieve self-compassion, with both examples and supporting psychological research. 

How you handle anxiety is one of the main factors that determine whether your obsessive-compulsive personality works for you or against you. Most people have some anxiety, some just handle it better than others. You’ve got determination and drive, but if your anxiety drives you rather than your passion driving you, you’re going to be white-knuckling it for a long time. Join me for an exploration o...

Work can be a nightmare or one of the most satisfying aspects of our lives--depending on our motivation and attitude toward it. If it is a source of mastery and accomplishment for us it can be fulfilling. But if we use it to avoid feelings it will not be satisfying and can even lead us to burnout. 

Even once you've begun to channel your obsessive-compulsive tendencies more constructively, you will be faced with triggers, circumstances that have the potential to make you react in ways you regret. This episode explores just what triggers are, offers examples, and offers tools to help you manage them more wisely. 

An undervalued aspect of human personality, mastery motivation can lead to fulfillment if well-integrated, or addictions and depression if not. IN this episode we explore the role that mastery in the lives of people with obsessive-compulsive tendencies, for better and worse, through the lens of research psychology, archetypes, and positive psychology. 

Proving yourself is, on the one hand, part of our social makeup, but it can also backfire if we neglect our true self to impress others. It can lead to heightened anxiety, diminishing the fulfillment that might come with living well naturally. In this episode we explore some of the insecurities that can lead to trying too hard to prove yourself. 

This the fourth and final episode in the series on Four Types of Obsessive-Compulsive Personality. Think-Planner types rely on imagination & foresight to deal with their world and can be very creative, but they can also get stuck obsessing & procrastinating. Join us as we explore this personality type through popular culture, mythology and psychology. 

Holidays can bring out the best and the worst in us. For people with obsessive-compulsive tendencies holiday expectations can elicit more control and perfectionism, blocking the joy we hope for, and inviting the disappointments we dread. But some give up hope completely, wish for nothing, and just try to get through the season with as little psychological damage as possible. We explore all these p...

The 3rd type of obsessive-compulsive personality is the Server-Friend, who can become either wonderful companions, or people pleasers who lose their true self. Their suffering is not always seen, but it's real. We look at the stories of two examples, one unbalanced, the other very well balanced. 

Delaying gratification may get you what you want. But used too frequently it can erode the capacity for pleasure, mastery and meaning. And invite suffering. This episode explores what happens when delaying gratification becomes chronic, and we re-wire our brain so that fulfillment is no longer possible. Two stories, one playful, the other painfully serious, illustrate the the dangers of delaying g...

One type of obsessive-compulsive personality, the Worker-Doer, can experience fulfillment or burnout, depending on how well they balance it with other aspects of the compulsive personality. This episodes contains descriptions of the personality type, strengths and weaknesses, stories about it from myth and legend, and suggestions about how to integrate it with other aspects of the personality.