The Happiness Standard

What if happiness isn't the destination we've been told it is? What if it's actually a practice? Discover the psychology of happiness, why the next milestone never feels like enough, and the research-backed mindset shift that could change the way you experience everyday life. Episodes Mentioned: https://open.spotify.com/episode/5oKvDiiUy63pmAwbawHbr6?si=dBSHQ8BvT_CYc1Hx8MT6JA Reference...

Still waiting for an apology? An explanation? One last conversation? In this episode, Dr. Sarah Eileen-Downey Akers explores why closure is overrated—and how to find peace, heal, and move forward after endings that were never fully explained. Boss, P. (1999). Ambiguous loss: Learning to live with unresolved grief . Harvard University Press. Nolen-Hoeksema, S. (2000). The role of rumination in depr...

Why do adult friendships feel so hard to maintain? In Episode 19 of The Happiness Standard , Dr. Sarah Eileen-Downey Akers explores why friendships fade, what communication research teaches us about maintaining meaningful relationships, and why friendship loss can feel like a form of grief. If you've ever wondered what happened to a friendship—or how to build stronger ones—this episode is for...

You've been told confidence comes first. What if that's wrong? In Episode 18 of The Happiness Standard, Dr. Sarah Eileen-Downey Akers explores the psychology of confidence, self-efficacy, avoidance, and why the feeling you're waiting for actually comes after you begin. Discover the confidence catch—and why it could be the reason you feel stuck. Episodes Mentioned: Episode 11 - Congratu...

What if the confidence you rely on isn't actually yours? In Episode 17 of The Happiness Standard, Dr. Sarah Eileen-Downey Akers explores the hidden psychology behind validation, self-worth, confidence, and social approval. Discover why external validation feels so rewarding, how it can quietly shape your happiness, and the surprising path to building confidence from within. References: Bandura...

Are your expectations communicated or assumed? In EP 16 of  The Happiness Standard , Dr. Sarah Eileen-Downey Akers explores how expectations shape our relationships, self-worth, and emotional wellbeing. Learn how unmet expectations can lead to disappointment, why boundaries are essential for healthy communication, and how self-integrity helps build trust with yourself. Through communication theory...

Did COVID change the way you connect with people? In EP 15 of The Happiness Standard, Dr. Sarah Eileen-Downey Akers explores the rise of loneliness after the pandemic and why feeling disconnected impacts more than just our emotions. Using research from Hawkley and Cacioppo (2010), this episode breaks down the psychological, relational, & physical effects of loneliness — and how we begin reconn...

In this episode of The Happiness Standard, we discuss embracing change, outgrowing relationships, letting go of people who are no longer aligned with your life, and navigating uncertainty when the future feels unclear. Sometimes growth means accepting that not everyone is meant to come with you—and that not knowing what’s next doesn’t mean something is wrong. Even if that's scary! Tune in for...

Anger, sadness, anxiety, and jealousy aren’t the problem—they’re signals trying to tell you something. In this episode, Dr. Sarah Eileen-Downey Akers breaks down why all emotions serve a purpose and why we must learn how to respond to our emotions, not react to them. We also explore how identifying the fallacies and narratives we tell ourselves can improve emotional intelligence, mental health, re...

In this episode, Sarah shares her personal experience with grief—what it’s really felt like, what she’s learned along the way, and the questions people are often too afraid to ask out loud. Covering grief, healing, guilt, faith, and growth, she offers an honest look at navigating loss while still moving forward. If you’ve ever wondered, “Is this normal?” during your experience with grief—this epis...

What if the moments you call "failure" are actually the key to your biggest success? In this powerful episode of The Happiness Standard, Dr. Sarah Eileen-Downey Akers gets comfortable being uncomfortable as she explores how to reframe failure, overcome the fear of trying, and turn setbacks into growth. References: Castrillon, C. (2021, December 10). Why failure leads to career success ....

Feeling behind in life? In this episode of The Happiness Standard, we break down Social Comparison Theory and why your brain measures your life against other people’s timelines—friends, relationships, careers, and more. You’re not behind… you’re just using the wrong standard. Listen now on Spotify, YouTube, and Apple Podcasts 🎧 Reference: Festinger, L. (1954). A theory of social comparison proces...

Why do we say “I’m fine” when we’re not? In this episode of  The Happiness Standard , we break down the psychology of “saving face”—why we choose approval over authenticity and how it disconnects us from ourselves. Featuring a new show-style format during  The Standard segment, with b-roll footage and visual storytelling to bring these concepts to life. References:  Goffman, E. (1955). On Face-Wor...

Forgiveness doesn’t mean letting them back in. In this episode, we break down forgiveness vs. reconciliation, what a real apology looks like, and why you don’t need one to heal. Professor Sarah is in session! References Edmondson, A. C., & Lei, Z. (2014). Psychological Safety: the history, renaissance, and future of an interpersonal construct. Annual Review of Organizational Psychology and Org...

A birthday reflection on happiness, growth, and change! In this episode, Dr. Sarah Eileen-Downey Akers shares what this past year taught her about letting go, who you surround yourself with, and building meaningful relationships. She also talks about understanding the difference between the reality in your head and the one you actually live. Plus a Sunny Side segment and a moment of rooting for a...

Have you found what you’re looking for… or are you focused on the wrong things? In this episode of  The Happiness Standard , Dr. Sarah Eileen-Downey Akers dives into how your focus shapes your mindset, emotions, and overall life experience. If you’ve ever struggled with negative thoughts, comparison, feeling “not enough,” or feeling stuck, this episode will challenge you to shift your perspective...

Death doesn’t make life tragic. It makes life precious. In this week’s  The Standard  segment, Dr. Sarah Eileen-Downey Akers gives her most vulnerable perspective yet & explores how remembering life’s impermanence through Memento Mori can change the way we live, love, and show up for the moments that matter.

We’ve all heard the phrase,  “You can do anything you set your mind to.”  But is it actually true? In this episode, we explore the connection between the mind and body, how belief shapes our limits, and what happens when our mindset and actions align. Plus thoughts on Logan Paul, Hoppers , a flat tire story, and a reminder to stop and smell the freesias!

Are you giving yourself grace or making excuses? Decide if you’ve been meeting the bar you’ve set for yourself… or quietly lowering it. Plus: An Unfiltered Win from Wyoming, a Glimmer at a red light, Stone from the WWE, and a  Wuthering Heights review! Email thehappinessstandard@yahoo.com for a chance to be featured in next week's rotating segment :)

Last week, we gave ourselves permission to disappoint. This week, we’re giving ourselves permission to be disappointed. When expectations aren’t met. When someone falls short. When reality doesn’t match what we imagined. This episode is about standards, control, and how to stay grounded without becoming hardened. Disappointment is inevitable. Bitterness is optional. Happiness is still available.

Where did your standards come from — and did you choose them? In this episode, we explore discipline & boundaries as alignment: keeping promises to yourself, living by values you consciously decide, and finding stability and happiness in integrity rather than approval. At some point, you have to ask yourself: Whose approval are you seeking — based on who you’re willing to disappoint? Stick aro...

In this prequel episode, Dr. Akers shares the inspiration behind the show, walks through what to expect, and offers a look into her background so listeners can understand the perspective shaping the conversations ahead.

I’m so happy you’re here! On  The Happiness Standard , I explore what happiness really means — keeping what works, unlearning what doesn’t, and building a life that actually feels fulfilling. I mix research, reflection, and real conversation about identity, growth, and purpose. Full episodes launching soon!