The Greatest Generation

When Commander Riker’s mind is compromised on a dangerous mission, his jailers convince him that the life he knew aboard the Entrepreneur has been a fantasy. But when the firewall he’s erected to preserve his sanity begins to crack, Riker must keep his edge or risk finishing his reality too soon. Is the Entrepreneur a Seattle-chill type place? How deep is too deep to bow? Is that a Cardassian pill...

When Picard’s archaeology mentor comes aboard bearing gifts, it gives him a bad case of career FOMO. And when the professor wraps his Previa around a tree, the captain feels compelled to use it as an excuse to avoid a potentially perilous conference. Is TNG the secret source of contemporary baby names? Did that Cardassian bridge go up someone’s nose? Why didn’t they ever explain why that ship aspl...

When Captain Picard falls for a pointy coworker, the harmony of their relationship reverberates throughout the ship. But when things heat up on a nearby planet, Picard must make a choice between saving some lives and extinguishing their romance. What's the least Kevin-y impression? Is the Hood the only place you can be truly safe? Who's had the worst life on the show? It's the episode with a decid...

When the Entrepreneur is getting sprayed for space bugs, the entire crew disembarks for a local planet famous for its incessant smalltalk and picturesque horse riding trails. But when a ruthless group of criminals try to steal the nastiest stuff that comes out of the ship’s reactor, only JL Pipes can stop them. How often do the ship’s flight attendants have to do a brief safety demonstration? What...

When Worf is taken prisoner behind enemy lines, he turns his incarceration into a Cool Hand Worf-type situation. But when the inmates start regarding their farm implements as the weapons they are, the warden increases Worf's sentence...to death! Do Klingons have two-factor suicide authentication? Why does Worf fall in love so easily? What's the most offensive portmanteau? It's the episode that loo...

When alien technology and indigestion trigger parallel daddy quests for Data and Worf, one goes fully suicidal while the other goes full Rambo. All this is set against a tense backdrop of Captain Picard doing some aqueduct diplomacy and Dr. Crusher doing something decidedly naughty in Quark’s holosuites. Is Deep Space 9 well-lubricated enough for that space butthole? Did Farmer Hoggett get horribl...

When Captain Picard spills an awful lot of pasta sauce on the front of his uniform, the all-powerful Q gives him an opportunity to make out with his hot friend from college. Now he has to play a round of Would You Rather where the choice is a sword to the heart or having a boring joe job. Does Wolf 359 go in the Picard column or the Q column? Why all the impalements? What does Predator Hair Metal...

When Troi blacks out at a raging psychology conference, she wakes up having made some poor decisions the night before. Now she’s got to do a very dangerous walk of shame across the bridge of a Romulan war ship! Are the breadboxes the most or least kinky uniform? How far in advance do you need to book an appointment with Mr. Mot? How does Barash figure into all this? It’s the show that might have B...

When the Entrepreneur investigates a murder at the end of a breakfast buffet line, a very small station has a very big problem. But when the deceased officer's diary turns Geordi's investigation into titillation, Commander Riker has to step in between "a rock and Geordi's place." How much do you resent a roommate bringing a dog? Which cast member is an acceptable loss? Does this represent the end...

When the Entrepreneur’s holodeck tries going for a deep callback, the crew is once again facing a villain that can defeat Data. Now a man who should be inside the computer is wandering all over the ship and causing all kinds of trouble. Did Q steal that book? Is Picard trying his equivalent of ‘giving the chocolate’ to Moriarty? Who gives Guinan the most hat-envy? Everybody knows that holodeck per...

When Captain Jellico relieves Commander Riker of duty, his mission becomes finding the next best hot shot shuttlecraft pilot. (Unfortunately, that's not Geordi.) Meanwhile, Captain Picard is subjected to a form of torture that many would find WAY over the line. How many channels does Gul Madred get on that remote control? What would it take before Riker considered mutiny? How much bun is safe to s...

When Picard and the Entrepreneur crew break up, but he can’t move out for a few weeks, things get awkward. Meanwhile there’s a new captain aboard to Hackman the shit out of Riker’s Denzel. What is this mission anyways? How do you keep it 💯 with the Cardassians? Is being the good guys mutually exclusive with being the smart guys? It’s the episode where we get serious about Greatest Gen Con Twenty...

When the Entrepreneur rolls up on a pretty basic space station, the crew attempts to gauge if the mining being done there is up to snuff. Unfortunately, questions about "what constitutes life" get in the way of their review, and Commander Data misbehaves again. What's under a Klingon's beard? How many classes does Worf teach? Where did the rocks come from? It's the episode that's not as cute as WA...

When Geordi tries to jump start the Entrepreneur with Data’s battery, it causes some glitches in Worf’s playthrough of Red Dead Redemption. Now all the NPCs are Data, and Data is all the NPCs, and nobody can find the reset button. How deep is the shallow end of the R-rated pool? Is there anything more honorable than murdering Barclay? Its the episode where we play our own drinking game. #Problemat...

When a Previa containing Captain Picard, Ensign Ro, Guinan (and some other minor character) are transformed from the proud adults we've come to know into children, it becomes a great time for an enemy to hijack the Entrepreneur. Unfortunately, these hijackers are NOT smarter than a 5th grader. What is the worst ring tone? Why doesn't young Picard have an inner monologue? What's the market like for...

When the Entrepreneur’s new internship program is announced, the first participant is a brilliant orphan who fits right in. But when she starts showing off her I Dream of Jeannie impression, the crew’s most hated god-thing shows up to reprise his role as judge, jury and executioner. How did the costume department spin cloth out of cotton candy? What does being adopted have to do with fighting a wa...

When Commander Riker can't get enough sleep, his stamina for duty is called into question. But after having his arm swabbed for DNA by a bunch of lobster-handed aliens, the Enterprise crew decides to set up their holodeck for a CSI-style investigation. What is the Nubbin campaign policy? How long will scissors be a thing? Are Picard and Lt. Jae dating? It's the episode recording from a Shimoda-the...

When a dustbuster club gets on BART, they find one old rider who’s had some of his own Entrepreneur adventures. Now they’ve got to find a way to help this hopeless old fit in with their hip new ship. Where does the rubber meet the worldbuilding road? What job skills wouldn’t be obsolete after several decades? What did Guinan think her job was when everybody lost their memory? Was that a dip to bla...

When an important diplomat and his mother hitch a ride to a peace negotiation, her hostility toward Counselor Troi is palpable. But when the diplomat uses Troi's mind as his mental toilet, leaving the seat up is the least of her concerns. What attracts Craigslist roommates? How big is Worf's knife block? How much white-out did the line producer have? It's the episode that's "Apparently..."-level b...

When the Entrepreneur finds another broken down scout ship, Barclay’s clever plan to get over to the ship doesn’t go unpunished. Thrown into a paralyzing inner struggle, the only way the young lieutenant can confront his fear of being swept up in the matter stream is by grabbing onto a turd for dear life. When was the last time Reg or Miles used conditioner? Where are the admirals who have been in...

When the Enterprise crew is hot on the trail of some inter-dimensional murderers, they can't help but dress for the occasion. But when the second in a two part episode (which could really have been three, or only one) devolves into an incoherent mess, we decide to rewrite it ourselves. What is the one impression we refuse to do? What do Data snitches get, if not stitches? How much less is less, an...

When an overdramatic tour guide reveals a Data head at the end of some San Francisco sightseeing, the Entrepreneur crew is thrust into a tense temporal thriller. But before long, the tone shifts, and the show returns to its roots of daring viewers to come back after their summer break. Are we going to get the rest of our socks in the next episode? Why is Data a liar in this episode? It’s an episod...

When Captain Picard is zapped by a probe from a long-lost culture, the bridge crew doesn't try to move his body. But after he starts to like the soup within his hallucination, everyone starts to wonder if their captain will ever regain consciousness. Where's the perineum, really? How do you stay looking busy during a workplace medical emergency? What's the best way to ask a houseguest to leave? It...

When the Entrepreneur pulls off the road to help a broken down Romulan ship, Geordi and Ro go missing. Now Data has to plan a funeral, and really only talks at length about that with Worf. How many breadboxes does one ship need? Who has the best orange wedges between the transporter chief, the helmsperson, and the backup doctor? Have Doctor Crusher and Geordi ever hung out? What’s the right karaok...

When an away team finds the sad, sole survivor of a crashed Borgs ship, the Enterprise crew re-thinks whether or not they want to put an offer down on a property. But after Dr. Crusher nurses him back to health, Geordi develops feelings for him, which is problematic for a variety of reasons. What is Guinan's security clearance? How honest should Geordi's Tinder profile be? What is the "King Fly"?...