The Forbidden Forest

Slughorn secures a coveted invite to an elite potioneering competition for Hogwarts. The boys hate it, Lily loves it, and the Quidditch pitch may never be the same. James and Rho talk about materials, locality, and what constitutes a potion after James spends far too long trying to pronounce Machynlleth with minimal success. Things customarily devolve into Grindledore commentary shortly after.

Hey, it’s us. Happy 15 years to James from Rho.

Welcome to Thistlecat’s new podcast (welcome back). Just kidding, it’s still us, just interviewed by our close friend, Thistle, after a 2 year hiatus and many changes. Content warning: self inflicted xenophobia (aggrandised).

A seer is born in a catholic parish on an island in the North Irish sea and the marauders get their tea leaves read.  James and Rho talk about art shows, world building, red flags in relationships, and c*ck and ball torture. You know, the usual nonsense. 

The little prince is born. Rho and James are academic for five minutes and then everything devolves at an absolutely alarming pace. cw: peripartum psychosis, substance induced psychosis, discussion of mental illness and pregnancy

Remus takes the Knight Bus Godric Hallow. Rho and James discuss writing styles, spoilers, and how much one should breath on their bonsais.

James fumbles through an ode to Rho for their 11 year anniversary as ducks and dogs make a ruckus in the background. 

Two births and two deaths, and Walburga Black’s story is told. Sirius is caught unawares. Rho and James talk about burnout, going back to school, changing professions in a pandemic and round out the evening with grindeldore, as is custom.

Remus shows Sirius the magic of the muggle world and Sirius discovers safety amidst toasters, lawn mowers, and motorcycles.  Rho and James try very hard to have a real discussion about the HP universe and geopolitics, but it invariably devolves into absolute nonsense about Grindledor and crack creature!fics. Listen at your own risk. 

Sirius Orion Black leaves Grimmauld Place. There's graffiti, Jack and Cricket, learning to jump turnstiles and finding his way to a poplar lined avenue with a yellow house and a red mailbox. We discuss all of these things, but we completely forgot to mention moaning Myrtle, who's re-introduced to Hogwarts in the beginning of this chapter. Whoops. 

Remus is acquainted with death a second time. He's nostalgic and sad, and in the middle of all of that, he's found out and judged by a young pack of werewolves. Rho and James talk about James (mostly) and James's recent denials and revelations. 

Sirius Black is confronted with a whole manner of things, including his second invitation to Ishtar, whom Remus names Freya. Rho and James have their usual chat, and there's a lot of peeping in the background because we got ducklings! 

Remus forgets he’s a werewolf and then gets whomped by the willow. Rho and James get wildly off topic and discuss art, the creative process, and the statistical safety of aircrafts.

Sirius Black and Peter Pettigrew make enemies of cats. Sirius and Lily are at odds, and Lily suffers consequences. Rho and James talk about scenes Rho almost wrote into the chapter, fandom, cats and getting old. 

Remus has a gay panic and Sirius is a good friend. Rho and James talk about sex ed and breaking through writer's block. 

Sirius Black retakes the Yuletide. Remus stays mad about it. Rho and James talk about the last six weeks, including Rho nearly dying and James getting back on SSRIs. 

During their gruelling detention, the marauders find a mysterious room that may or may not enjoy Romeo and Juliet.  Rho and James are sunburnt and talk about the room of requirement and James's unnatural obsession with Shakespear from a very cold desert.  

It’s my ten year anniversary with James, so I wrote a letter.

Sirius Black turns fourteen, the boys go for a midnight stroll to find rare algae, and Voldemort asks Dumbledore for a job. Rho and James talk about survival strategies, how circumstances shape our views, and, then, somehow, syphilis.

Remus tries to be a grown up while struggling to wrap his head around his new classes and Sirius’s cryptic secret life. Rho and James discuss international wizarding politics, ethics in magic, and how differing societies might deal with muggles.

Sirius summers in Wales.  Turner, Shunpike and Dowd get up to no good, and there's dragons in Snowdonia National Park. Rho and James talk about our hilarious dogs, living in the wilderness and the locality of magic. 

Remus Lupin is a werewolf, and that's a fact he can't avoid forever. Rho and James talk about privilege, bigotry, and the nature of jealousy.

Sirius Black celebrates spring with the old gods. Rho and James discuss cults of power, demon horse birds, how they’re gatvol with dissociative amnesia, and, of course, Dumbledore’s pocket dimension.

Hope dies.  Rho and James talk most impactful deaths of the series, what we'd turn into horcruxes and what wizarding afterlife might be like. We get cut off because we talk too much, and then don't notice. Eventually, demon horse birds show up. 

Sirius Black is a beater. Rho and James talk about why teams are important and how jealously and hubris are perfectly human.