The Final Couplet

Shakespeare tries to explain why he's so horny and how his soul has nothing to do with it. Sonnet 151 Love is too young to know what conscience is; Yet who knows not conscience is born of love? Then, gentle cheater, urge not my amiss, Lest guilty of my faults thy sweet self prove. For, thou betraying me, I do betray My nobler part to my gross body’s treason. My soul doth tell my body that he m...

Shakespeare continues to talk about how the dark lady has blinded him - Wake up Shakespeare! Only 4 more Sonnets to go. Sonnet 150 O, from what power hast thou this powerful might With insufficiency my heart to sway? To make me give the lie to my true sight, And swear that brightness doth not grace the day? Whence hast thou this becoming of things ill, That in the very refuse of thy deeds There is...

Shakespeare is in real turmoil now as we reach the climax of his sonnets. I can't work out if the woman he is so in love with hates him or loves him back... I think it's the former. Sonnet 149 Canst thou, O cruel! say I love thee not, When I against myself with thee partake? Do I not think on thee, when I forgot Am of myself, all tyrant, for thy sake? Who hateth thee that I do call my frie...

Shakespeare questions his vision in this one. and I compare it to "Shallow Hal". Sonnet 148 O me, what eyes hath love put in my head, Which have no correspondence with true sight! Or if they have, where is my judgment fled, That censures falsely what they see aright? If that be fair whereon my false eyes dote, What means the world to say it is not so? If it be not, then love doth well de...

I'm joined this week by the brilliant Actor, Writer & Drag Artist Elliot Ditton AKA Fruit 'n Fibre. We had a lot of fun diving into this bleak sonnet - stick around for Elliot's incredible re-write at the end! Sonnet 147 My love is as a fever, longing still For that which longer nurseth the disease, Feeding on that which doth preserve the ill, Th’ uncertain sickly appetite to pleas...

I'm joined this week by the brilliant actress and writer Florence Roberts. You might have seen her recently at the RSC in the Forsyte Saga or on PBS in Miss Scarlet and the Duke. Florence is also a brilliant poet! Had a lot of fun deconstructing this bleak sonnet - hope you enjoy listening to it. Sonnet 146 Poor soul, the centre of my sinful earth, [......] these rebel powers that thee array,...

This is one of Shakespeare's weirder ones but I have to say it rolled off the tongue nicely! Sonnet 145 Those lips that Love’s own hand did make Breathed forth the sound that said “I hate” To me that languished for her sake; But when she saw my woeful state, Straight in her heart did mercy come, Chiding that tongue that ever sweet Was used in giving gentle doom, And taught it thus anew to gree...

The Fair Youth x Dark Lady colab we have all been waiting for! Sonnet 144 Two loves I have, of comfort and despair, Which like two spirits do suggest me still. The better angel is a man right fair, The worser spirit a woman colored ill. To win me soon to hell my female evil Tempteth my better angel from my side, And would corrupt my saint to be a devil, Wooing his purity with her foul pride. And w...

My guest the week is the wickedly talented Actor, Writer and Voice Artist Joe Eyre. I had great fun recording this episode with Joe and debunking this ridiculous sonnet, stick around for his brilliant story at the end. Sonnet 143 Lo, as a careful huswife runs to catch One of her feathered creatures broke away, Sets down her babe, and makes all swift dispatch In pursuit of the thing she would have ...

Shakespeare tells his lover that they both sleep with other people's partners and that's OK! Sonnet 142 Love is my sin, and thy dear virtue hate, Hate of my sin, grounded on sinful loving. O, but with mine compare thou thine own state, And thou shalt find it merits not reproving; Or if it do, not from those lips of thine, That have profaned their scarlet ornaments And sealed false bonds of...

Shakespeare is slowly unravelling - he says his eyes, nose, and taste hate his lover but his heart loves her. I try and work out what the hell that means! Sonnet 141 In faith, I do not love thee with mine eyes, For they in thee a thousand errors note; But ‘tis my heart that loves what they despise, Who, in despite of view, is pleased to dote; Nor are mine ears with thy tongue’s tune delighted, Nor...

Shakespeare makes desperate attempt to try and make the dark lady love him. It's both pathetic and manipulative - classic Shakespeare. Sonnet 140 Be wise as thou art cruel; do not press My tongue-tied patience with too much disdain; Lest sorrow lend me words, and words express The manner of my pity-wanting pain. If I might teach thee wit, better it were, Though not to love, yet, love to tell m...

Shakespeare is head of over heals in love with the "dark lady" but her can see his love isn't necessarily reciprocated. Sonnet 139 O! call not me to justify the wrong That thy unkindness lays upon my heart; Wound me not with thine eye, but with thy tongue: Use power with power, and slay me not by art, Tell me thou lov'st elsewhere; but in my sight, Dear heart, forbear to glance t...

Shakespeare talks about ageing and infidelity and LIES in this one. The relationship is getting spicy. Sonnet 138 When my love swears that she is made of truth, I do believe her though I know she lies, That she might think me some untutored youth, Unlearned in the world's false subtleties. Thus vainly thinking that she thinks me young, Although she knows my days are past the best, Simply I cre...

Shakespeare talks directly to love in this one and it's safe to say he isn't happy! Sonnet 137 Thou blind fool, Love, what dost thou to mine eyes, That they behold, and see not what they see? They know what beauty is, see where it lies, Yet what the best is take the worst to be. If eyes, corrupt by over-partial looks, Be anchored in the bay where all men ride, Why of eyes' falsehood ha...

Shakespeare continues using his name over and over again in order to make a point. The final couplet in this one hits different. Sonnet 136 If thy soul check thee that I come so near, Swear to thy blind soul that I was thy Will, And will, thy soul knows, is admitted there; Thus far for love, my love-suit, sweet, fulfil. Will, will fulfil the treasure of thy love, Ay, fill it full with wills, and m...

Shakespeare gets very sexual in this one. I've never heard so many innuendos in one poem - listener be warned! Sonnet 135 Whoever hath her wish, thou hast thy Will, And Will to boot, and Will in overplus; More than enough am I that vex thee still, To thy sweet will making addition thus. Wilt thou, whose will is large and spacious, Not once vouchsafe to hide my will in thine? Shall will in othe...

Shakespeare and his mate have both fallen in love with the same woman. Nightmare! Sonnet 134 So now I have confessed that he is thine, And I my self am mortgaged to thy will, Myself I'll forfeit, so that other mine Thou wilt restore to be my comfort still: But thou wilt not, nor he will not be free, For thou art covetous, and he is kind; He learned but surety-like to write for me, Under that b...

Join me and my amazing guest Kaffe Keating for our third and final Christmas Special. We talk Shakespeare and religion, weird festive traditions and the hell they got up to at New Year! Kaffe also surprised me with a phenomenal Christmas present at the end, so make sure to stick around.

Shakespeare is really annoyed because his friend has now fallen in love with the Dark Lady as well. Our story continues with a confrontation! Sonnet 133 Beshrew that heart that makes my heart to groan For that deep wound it gives my friend and me! Is't not enough to torture me alone, But slave to slavery my sweet'st friend must be? Me from myself thy cruel eye hath taken, And my next self...

Shakespeare talks about his lovers eyes being all dark and pitying. He seems to like being pitied for some reason. Sonnet 132 Thine eyes I love, and they, as pitying me, Knowing thy heart torments me with disdain, Have put on black and loving mourners be, Looking with pretty ruth upon my pain. And truly not the morning sun of heaven Better becomes the grey cheeks of the east, Nor that full star th...

Shakespeare exhibits some incel behaviour in this one, I don't think he knows whether he loves the dark lady or not at this point. Sonnet 131 Thou art as tyrannous, so as thou art, As those whose beauties proudly make them cruel; For well thou know'st to my dear doting heart Thou art the fairest and most precious jewel. Yet, in good faith, some say that thee behold, Thy face hath not the p...

I'm joined for the second time by the brilliant actor and writer, Emma Paetz. You might have seen her in the likes of DC's "Pennyworth" & BBCs "The Famous Five". We had a great time unpacking this classic. Sonnet 130 My mistress' eyes are nothing like the sun; Coral is far more red than her lips' red; If snow be white, why then her breasts are dun; If hairs...

Shakespeare talks about lust and how damaging it can be. This one is a LITTLE SPICY. Sonnet 129 Th' expense of spirit in a waste of shame Is lust in action; and till action, lust Is perjured, murd'rous, bloody, full of blame, Savage, extreme, rude, cruel, not to trust, Enjoyed no sooner but despisèd straight, Past reason hunted; and, no sooner had Past reason hated as a swallowed bait On p...

Shakespeare wishes he was a piano key so the dark lady could play him elegantly with her fingers. Weird? Sonnet 128 How oft when thou, my music, music play'st, Upon that blessed wood whose motion sounds With thy sweet fingers when thou gently sway'st The wiry concord that mine ear confounds, Do I envy those jacks that nimble leap, To kiss the tender inward of thy hand, Whilst my poor lips...