The Dick Show

Coach has a son, giant bars of soap, Space Force and military uniforms, the bro economy, Adam Baldwin blocks me and is an idiot, nurses who can't talk, obvious sports announcers, buried in collectables, doing a barrel roll, Crippled Jesus needs dating advice, sirens in music, Ben from Drunken Peasants calls in, Mundane Matt kills his career, funeral stories, and "Not For Human Consumption" squares...

Libertarians, globalists, hate speech against the Illuminati, the will to execute failure, using the airplane slide, people who walk around with neck pillows around their neck, a homeless ranking system, taking selfies at funerals, concern trolling and pretending to care, how the KKK was born, how valuable is your semen, "So You Want to Talk About Race", Uncle Buck and the Cuck Sockers, Mental Jes...

The scourge of squeaky beds, Liquor Wardens, crying over scrambled eggs, Brittany Venti calls in to correct the story of The 4Chad Strangling, TDS Top Gay handles some pork, women saying "interesting", Body Dysmorphia, KevinALandau.com, Asterios' flub of the century, and a memorial rant for a fallen Dickhead; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

The local bride catcher, bachelorette parties, drag shows, military parking, the last straws, freedom of speech means freedom from consequences, Chris Chan goes kiss crazy, Layc's high school boyfriend stole money from her, a Trader Joe's death trap, the parallel parking bet, Saudi Arabia's emergency woman driver number, Brittany Venti gets strangled by her ex-boyfriend, Asterios, Swatting, and Ma...

Doing a three quarter-ass job, the Trump balloon, how to pull teeth, filming white people filming black people, racial sensitivity training, the gender outrage porn gap, Cat Girl gets sued, Chris Chan Gets extorted, COBRA, Null, Palestine's lasers on the moon, The Nihilist Devil's Advocate, and Mental Jess considers a call in; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

People getting stuck in holes, snipers for hat snatchers, a real-life PvP solution, racist artificial intelligence, yelling at an Apple Genius, the 20 Million Dollar Mead man calls in, Dame Pesos' news segment, and Clay Bangs a Trans Woman; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

Road Rage: Dallas ends in a shooting, Peach calls in about the Mustard Chug-off, I have a solution for the Supreme Court, an erotic story about shoes, uncucked racism, small Tupperware, Madcucks' retirement and the final bonus episode of the Biggest Solution in the Universe, the microphone interlock device by Soyboy Industries, exploding honey mead, more countersuit backtracking, bar stools, fat a...

Post Traumatic Ball-Busting Disorder, family vacations, floating prisons, Map Rotators, Spider Savers, I sink a boat, culture is a zoo, praying to God finally works, Landau Breaks up with Maddox, Asterios' Legal Offense Fund, too-long of a foreskin, Lowtax's #MeToo moment, Peach's mustard wager, and Sean can't make it; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

My dad tries to correct the record on the Optimus Prime story, Sh*tty Passenger gets mugged, I have mana problems, packing a fake penis in your pants, #MeToo and the duality of abuse, lactating dads, Antoids falls asleep while waiting to talk, a string of very generic parenting advice, to have kids or not to have kids, movies need a man-hating score, newscasters with racist accents, arguing with a...

The Road Rage: Dallas tattoo, Tim Pool calls in to bury the hatchet, I try to stop everyone from going to Greenland, "Dead or Alive", computer jiggle physics, and the War on Sexiness, Madcucks calls in to read from The Worst Interview in the Universe, Antoids brings in the "Airing of the Grievances"--possibly the most embarrassing audio ever recorded, Allan from Not For Human Consumption plays the...

Landau is putting together a settlement offer AFTER THE DISMISSAL and is upset at his Google results, Mental Jess catches Maddox "trying to cheat" on her and immediately drops dysfunctional dimes on Facebook, I get the Ralph Retort a strike on YouTube, racism and jokes and the death of everything funny, shooting the Lolsuit courtroom transcript, why we have Incels in one simple graph, Snapchat fil...

Jerusalem is Disneyland for the somber, Israel likes their flag as much as the US does, the time Mohammed jumped into space, Ramadan and the sweet sound of black women, Sweaty Suits, mildew towels, how to make your girlfriend lose weight, "making it official", Dustin returns, Road Rage: Dallas, gun fever, the lolsuit, countersuits, and Asterios is no longer employed by Webber Shandwick; all that a...

Maddox's lawsuit against me is dismissed with prejudice, I am detained by the Abu Dhabi customs police in a libertarian nightmare, hiding Israeli receipts from the secret police, Israeli women, the politeness of supervillains, my new classification of countries above first world countries, toilets in the kitchen, my take on Midwest Maddox getting fleeced by an ego project, a Dickhead courtroom rep...

Donating your kid's birthday presents to charity overhead, the importance of a sharable thermometer, why some straight men are obsessed with gay rights, Aydin Paladin on why women love talking in a way that resembles a joke (but isn't) about their gross bodies, Mumkey Jones' book "Diary of a Supreme Gentlemen" is banned, firing your dad, my grey pubes and nude performances, Clay Early rats on a ch...

Boomer humor and their legacy of spilled popcorn, "The Diary of a Supreme Gentleman" by Mumkey Jones, The Cassandra Bias--AKA why everyone thinks they're smarter than people smarter than them, Asterios gets kicked out of a bar, Madcucks vs Maddox, Thanos the Incel, killing yourself in Greenland, "Cool Cat Stops a School Shooting" and other gigantic letdowns, Tony from Hack the Movies and his rushe...

Sean brings in a problem, I miss an opportunity, Asterios doesn't get a lap dance, a ban on running, unfair hangovers, more idiocy from the papacy, Denzel vs. Peach, the erosion of the troll, miracles are all around us, Tim Tams, sharking, a legal bill measuring contest, my mom calls in, and resisting the inescapable craving to fail; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

Happy little protests, Bob Ross can't paint a cabin to save his life, Ben from Drunken Peasants calls in, my own banned words list, experience creep, my only weakness, a premature movement for robot rights, problems with the conveniences of an automatic car, being worth less than nothing, Bill Guy the Science Dude answers your questions, drinking urine, "Sh*t Talker" gets an upgrade, getting bored...

Maddox loses his trademark application for sole ownership of "The Biggest Problem in the Universe", bullying, bully hunting, and hunting the bully hunters, Happy Birthday Thieves, the first stop in Asterios' Garage Tour, middle age Jaeger's, everything you ever needed to know about buying a house, four-square disasters, congressional hearings, the hot girl on Izzy Nobre's Instagram, custom Gameboy...

The myth of blue blood, prostitution and Congress' continuing attempt to get in Lady Liberty's pants, what is simple battery, times I have been attacked by women, the LARPing bearded "badasses" of LA, Mumkey Jones the almost English teacher, playing baseball for the worst team in the world, Kevin from The Thought Cops, the time I was attacked by six housewives, a financial aid based cryptocurrency...

My problem with Sateen sheets, the Smurflings were whack, Status Quo bias, the taxes that boil us slowly, Lagavulin says Nick Rekieta drinks their Scotch wrong, Bunty King calls in, the death of humor on the Internet, Digibro and Mumkey Jones' fall out and who is the Maddox, defending the indefensible, I am worse than (virtual) child porn in some circles, interrupting Dad's sexy time, the advent r...

Pornhub: The Promised Land of de-platforming, taking protesting teenagers off the streets for their own safety, gearing up for "The Revenge of the Jedi", the Squatty Potty debate, Maddox's attempt at a  $2,545 shakedown , how to tell if a chick is ovulating, Captain Jack*ss investigates Dustin's Dickumentary, how many chicks is too many chicks, the Omnibus bill, eating hair, Ron Babcock is "sorry...

Chick Jeopardy, Intersectional Engineering, Brad from Phone Losers gets raided by the FBI, replacing your credit card numbers, making the NRA friendlier, Peach has more issues with the bathroom, MyRoomRecords releases "Too Small of an Album", St. Patrick's Day, midnight miracle vomiting, Squatty-Potties, the mustard bet, an erotic forgery, "My First Sanctions", Maddox's newly filed and massively f...

An altercation with a cliche on International Women's Day, why no one goes to sporting events, The Dodgers commit Opening Day ticket extortion, Peach sends in her greatest Jass number yet, the effect of weed on the police, Grant Mooney has a new podcast, Nick Rekieta Bible-splains to me, why Rucka will never be on this show, Martin Shkreli makes people happy, more sure-fire pickup lines from Ameri...

The Dick Show Album charts at #2 in Billboard comedy, Vicodin hoarding nurses, brushing my teeth with new things, youth sports parents, Male Autism, David Hogg is a little POS, FigBat DiggerNick gets kidney stones, UPS postage reuse, Larry's Flag Day, Harmful Opinions talks Twitch ToS violations, uppity waitresses, customer service hostages, the Corporatocracy, and the cuck bounty; all that and mo...

Road Rage: Portland, planting the strip club seed, women hiding your stuff, bathroom fans that are too quiet, playing the poop blues, cops preventing crimes, 80s Guy loses his keys, the Portland Goss Bomb, Jane Walker Black, the future dystopia and the purchasing power of women, The Dick Show IQ Test, double doors, self-censorship, and getting my nipples pulled off; all that and more this week on...