The Coaching Question

We explore a deceptively subtle but powerful distinction: the difference between reflective practice and reflexive practice in coaching. Most coaches are trained to reflect. Fewer develop the capacity to be reflexive. This conversation unpacks why that matters - and how reflexivity represents a deeper layer of professional and personal maturity. If this episode sparked reflection (or reflexivity),...

We explore why even highly capable, motivated clients can stay stuck despite knowing what they want to change. We introduce Robert Kegan and Lisa Lahey’s Immunity to Change model, which reveals how unconscious competing commitments can quietly block progress - not through resistance, but through self-protection. The model is brought to life through a live example, as Sarah works through the four-c...

We explore why taking your time at the start of a coaching session is one of the most powerful, and most frequently overlooked, skills in coaching. We unpack the common tendency for coaches, especially those under pressure or early in their practice, to leap toward solutions the moment a client states a goal. Through rich metaphors like the tandem bicycle, the pencil sharpener, and the Bake Off pr...

In this episode we explore how coaches can support clients who are dealing with a narcissistic boss . We unpack what narcissism truly means - beyond social media clichés - and discuss the difference between narcissistic personality disorder and narcissistic tendencies that may still create toxic dynamics at work. We highlight common signs that a client might be working for a narcissist, such as se...

In this episode we unpack contracting as a living, multi-layered practice rather than a one-time formality. We explore three distinct levels of contracting: Administrative – The essentials: when and where sessions happen, confidentiality agreements, cancellation terms, fees, and note-taking. Professional – Clarifying goals, purpose, scope, and whether to involve other parties such as a line manage...

In this episode we discuss how clients can inadvertently keep themselves stuck by ignoring aspects of themselves, others or the situation. Discounting is a classic topic that emerges in coaching sessions. We share how using Julie Hay’s “Steps to Success” model can help to shed a light on a client’s discounting beliefs and create more enabling ones. This approach is versatile in its application, bu...

In this episode we explore how psychodynamic concepts like projection, shadow, and transference show up in coaching. These unconscious patterns can distort the coaching relationship, making reflective practice essential for staying present and effective. We highlight the role of supervision in spotting these dynamics, supporting coaches normatively, formatively, and restoratively. Parallel process...

In this episode we explore the impact of global turbulence on our coaching practice. With ongoing uncertainty in the world, including recent political events, we discuss how these external challenges affect both coaches and our clients. We dive into key themes such as emotional impact, self-awareness, supervision, and the importance of reflective practice. Sarah reflects on her approach to media c...

In this episode, we discuss the often-overlooked topic of endings in coaching relationships. This is an update to a special we did when Gregor’s Coaching At Work article was published but we’ve updated and expanded on our thinking since. So we’ve explored  how endings can impact both coaches and clients, offering practical insights and tips on how to approach this significant stage of the coa...

In this episode, we dive into the critical distinction between empathy and compassion in coaching, exploring how these concepts influence the effectiveness of coaching sessions.  Drawing from our own coaching and supervisory experiences, we discuss the importance of boundaries, self-awareness, and personal responsibility in both coaching and supervision.  We touch on how coaches can main...

In this episode, we explore the dynamics of "inside-out" versus "outside-in" coaching approaches and how these impact sustainable transformation for leaders. We discuss the nuanced process of recognising when clients are ready for deeper, reflective work and using "safe experiments" to help leaders overcome resistance and embrace deeper transformation Touching on frameworks like Immunity to Change...

In this episode, we dive into the nuanced dynamics of coaching relationships, exploring the importance of progress markers, autonomy, and the delicate balance between ongoing support and the risk of dependency.  We discuss how effective coaching isn’t just about achieving goals, but involves creating a "thinking partnership" that helps clients broaden their perspectives, especially at senior...

In this episode, we explore the highly relevant topic of overwhelm and how this shows up in coaching, especially with senior leaders. We talk about developmental fallback and the need for leaders to be aware of their internal states and triggers, especially during times of stress, So they can avoid reverting to less resourceful behaviours. This is also something coaches need to be aware of to meet...

In this episode we continue our exploration of the application of Transactional Analysis in coaching. We build on the previous episode with our fictional case study of Adam. Adam has moved into a management role where he is managing colleagues who were once teammates, and he is finding it hard to manage their performance.  We share various coaching techniques we might employ to support Adam,...

In this episode of the Transactional Analysis series of The Coaching Question Podcast, we explore how we might apply TA in our coaching practice using a new fictional case study of a client called Adam. Adam has recently been promoted to his first 'Manager of Manager' role, struggles to say no, delegate, deal with poor performance and is at danger of burning out. Building on the previous episode,...

In this episode, we continue to delve into Transactional Analysis (TA), with our fictional client named Alicia. Alicia has brought two challenges to coaching; difficulty delegating and a tendency to please others. You’ll hear about the concept of behavioural drivers within TA, which are behavioural tendencies that we learn in childhood and carry with us into adulthood. In many ways they are a stre...

In this episode, we dive into the practical application of TA in a coaching scenario using a fictional character Alicia, who represents a typical client struggling with saying no, setting and maintaining boundaries, resulting in potential burnout. With Alicia as a fictional case study, we discuss how we might support her as Executive Coaches skilled in applying TA to our work. Building on the PAC...

In this episode, we build on our introduction to TA by introducing the Drama Triangle. Explicitly using the Drama Triangle is a technique that is hugely valuable in supporting clients to understand the roles they play in relationships with others. Coaches love working with this tool because it is visual and easy to understand. We present the core idea that as human beings, we are relational, and i...

In this first episode of Season 4 of The Coaching Question, we introduce the theme of the season - Transactional Analysis (TA) and its application in coaching. We find that TA offers a valuable lens for coaching, and in this episode we briefly share some of the core ideas offered by TA and highlight how these can support clients to deepen their self-awareness and gain new insights. Listen to this...

In this special episode, we chose to reflect on endings in coaching. Gregor was one of four coaches who contributed to an article on this topic for Coaching At Work, and we wanted to take the opportunity to think this through together on our podcast.   We talk about the emphasis that is placed on the start of coaching engagements, and the importance that is placed on the results that are...

In this episode we consider the relevance of leaders integrating coaching skills into their day-to-day work. We reflect on coaching as a mindset and an approach, which can be seen in the way they behave. We discuss some examples of coaching skills that a leader may begin to introduce to their repertoire, such as developing a coaching presence, creating space for others to think, active listening a...

In this episode we explore how we can use metaphors in coaching and how this wonderful tool, that is actually ever present in our language, can help coaches, their clients, leaders and organisations. Metaphors offer us a symbolic language that goes beyond the limitations of the english language and provides us with a completely different way of expressing ourselves. This can be hugely powerful in...

In this episode we sit down with Anna Carus-Wilson of Frank Partners. Anna is a professional actor who works with leaders in business and we wanted to talk to her about the work that she does, and explore the parallels with our work as coaches.  Frank Partners are a team of highly skilled facilitators and coaches who bring the practical, playful, resilient and creative nature of the rehearsal...

Imposter Syndrome often comes up in coaching, but it isn’t always labelled as such. It may show up as a lack of confidence, or self-esteem, self-belief or a drive for perfectionism.  In this episode we reflect on how, in our experience, imposter syndrome can show up in coaching. We share some of the ways in which we might work with a client who brings this to their coaching session. Listen in...

Onboarding is an area in which coaching can play a crucial role in supporting the successful transition of a senior leader. So often, organisations focus on the selection and assessment of the new hire, but the importance of setting that new hire up for success can be easily overlooked. In this episode we interview Gillian Frame, an executive coach who does a lot of work in this space. There are m...