The Betchelor

Kay and Derek are back and they are filled to the brim with “Bachelor In Paradise” gossip. At 6:40 they talk about David and how he’s back to his old tricks, bad mouthing Jordan by spreading rumors that he is only here to “settle”. At 12:15 they discuss Colton and the mess that he’s made for himself in paradise by leading Tia on. Kay says you can see Colton hit his breaking point when Becca finall...

Kay and Derek are back with 5 hours of Bachelor Television rolled into one action packed podcast. They discuss the “Bachelorette” finale and it’s few surprises. At 6:10 Derek explains that Blake got screwed by being the second guy to meet Becca’s family. At 17:00 they discuss ABC’s attempt to address Garrett’s love for racist memes and whether or not his apology was sincere. At 20:00 they move int...

Kay and Derek are joined by everyone’s favorite male model, Jordan Kimball, to discuss the “Men Tell All”. At 2:15, Jordan explains where he gets his analogies from and how he plans to elevate them to a “biblical” level in the future. At 4:20, they mention that Lincoln is missing from the episode and Jordan spills some tea about what it was like to bunk with him. At 8:00, Derek can’t understand wh...

Betches gives a rose to your new hosts of The Betchelor, Kay Brown and Derek Peth! Kay and Derek sink their teeth into Tour Guide Becca’s Thailand adventure with the boys. At 7:33, they talk about Becca ruining this week's episode by saying she’s in love with Blake and Garrett, but only falling in love with Jason….bye Jason! Derek explains that most of these contestants are only with the Bachelor/...

This week Aleen and Jordana are joined by the host of 1010 WINS “The Trend”, Rebecca Granet. It’s Hometown Date Week and there’s a lot to discuss. Is Becca’s stylist doing a bad job? Rebecca gives Garrett the award for biggest letdown of the season. Despite being from Buffalo, they agree that Jason’s stock is rising, while Blake’s mom makes him sound like a loser. At 28:50, it’s time for Colton’s...

Aleen says this was a good episode but nothing really happened at all. They talk about Garrett and his love for racist memes - Becca still doesn't know. They move onto Colton and how he's a virgin that can't drive. Isn't it cruel that they took him on a boat making sexual conk puns? Aleen finds him boyish. Sami is confused at why sports and football would preclude him from having sex. They theoriz...

Jordana and Aleen are joined by Alexis Waters to talk about this and past seasons of the Bachelor. She talks about listing her job as "Aspiring dolphin trainer", how she had to go with a shark costume, and mentions that she wouldn't "boom" anyone on this season. They move onto this season and agree that Jason is the frontrunner. Nobody likes Chris. Jordana thinks he seems like an angry Ben Stiller...

Sami and Jordana have gotten complaints that they don't actually like the show, but they can't help it if it's objectively bad. They talk about Vegas - is it the perfect place to fall in love or the exact opposite? Sami views Becca's approval of Colton as obligatory. After, they move onto the Wayne Newton portion of the episode. Hopefully, one day we can live in a world where contestants don't hav...

Aleen sits down with Tyler Gilden to discuss this season of the Bachelor. They talk about Garrett (and his questionable likes on Instagram). After they move onto to group dates. Then they talk about Jean Blanc’s massive downward spiral. Finally, they move onto Becca’s blah date with Wills. Don’t miss ample roasting of David. Like, who falls off a bed? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaph...

Aleen debuts on the Betchelor for this season of Bachelorette. She's mainly relieved that no one is saying, “Let’s do the damn thing." She and Jordana discuss Jordan, who may be good looking, but how often does he get a SECOND date? Everyone on the show is officially a climber. The Colton and Tia drama is ridiculous, but not as ridiculous as the faceplant situation with Chicken. Chris talks like a...

Sami and Jordana are joined by Bachelor favorite Corinne Olympios to talk about this season and more. Regarding last night: the group dates are cheesy and the guys are overly dramatic. It all feels like sleep-away camp. And the forced meet ups with former contestants are way too much. They also talk about Corinne’s beef with Taylor and how the producers are milking stories just a bit too much (cou...

Sami and Jordana sit down with former Bachelorette Andi Dorfman to kick off Becca’s season. They discuss what it’s like to be the lead, and how life changes after the show ends and you have a million new insta followers. They touch on Ashley and Jared’s new relationship, Andi’s old relationships, the pros and cons of going on the show, and if the guys are really getting worse every season or it ju...

Jordana and Sami meet with Bekah M. and Kendall. They talk sororites, eating on location during the Bachelor, and Kendall's love for dead animals. Bekah is wearing the circular earrings that Arie put his fingers through. After, they interview the author of Bachelor Nation who gives them a look behind the scenes of this season (and who can't stand Arie as much as the rest of us). Learn more about y...

Jordana and Aleen discuss the season finale of The Bachelor. Arie and Becca's awkward, silence-ridden end was emphatically undramatic. Aleen felt nothing. Arie's choosing of Lauren proves that exactly what everyone predicted: Arie just wants a 'hot dumb blonde bitch.' The most she ever opened up was her saying, "I want our dogs to meet." Arie's sole criteria appears to be that Lauren is very hot,...

Sami and Aleen discuss the Women Tell All and Fantasy Suites episodes, since rebranded as the “Romantic Overnight Date” episode. Sami quips that the first thing that stood about the Women Tell All episode is that the show was much better without Arie. Aleen then discusses a Betches controversy; Arie blocked @betchesluvthis on Twitter, so the drama is real. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit m...

Jordana and Sami discuss the massive amount of Bachelor programming (six hours a week!). Jordana mentions that picking the person to vote off on the Bachelor Winter Games was a bit mean-spirited. Then they talk about the role of race, with several pointed critiques. After, they go over this week’s episode. Arie visits several of the contestants hometowns, and let’s just say: they’re weren’t all fo...

Jordana and Aleen are joined by Taylor Nolan from the next season of the Bachelor and Bachelor in Paradise. She’s engaged to Derek. She talks about their relationship and how they met in June and were engaged about two months later. She also expresses how much crazy action was taken out of the Bachelor, including Derek licking her armpit. Taylor also talks about her sobriety and how crazy things c...

The contestants head to Paris in a highly-sponsored boat, everyone has intimacy issues, and Arie's love of under-30 women is called out once again, all on this week's episode of the Betchelor. As much as it hurts to think about, Lauren B.'s and Arie's awkward date must be discussed. Is Krystal's voice the only sane thing left? Actually, no... and there goes Jordana's bracket. Learn more about your...

Sami and Aleen talk about this week’s ep of the Bachelor. The gang heads to Ft. Lauderdale, but the contestants don’t seem to realize that those yachts aren’t Arie’s. As Sami puts it, “It’s just a show. When it’s your life, you’ll be going into debt with Arie as he runs out of Instagram endorsements.” The gentle Ft. Lauderdale breeze can’t soothe that kind of brutality. Sami and Aleen also agree t...

Sami and Aleen cover this week’s episode of The Bachelor. Krystal’s voice is again a target, but her tendency to give speeches consisting of empty inspirational quotes shows that her weird voice is actually one of her better traits. She has issues. Aleen can’t stop cringing when Arie makes his moves, particularly on a certain 22-year-old. They conclude that Bekah actually has more maturity and poi...

This week on The Betchelor, Jordana and Aleen discuss the fact that Arie thinks with his penis and has eliminated all of the older contestants. They talk about his weird kissing with Bekah M during the wrestling date and how young she is, the awkward Napa date with Lauren S., and Annaliese’s mental breakdown. They play "Shoot, BFF, Party With" with Bibiana, Krystal, and Annaliese and talk about ho...

On this week’s episode of The Betchelor, Jordana and Aleen discuss Krystal’s annoying voice and creepy hometown date. They talk about Arie pretty woman-ing Bekah M, Annaliese’s absurd bumper car freak-out, and the showdown between Bibiana and Krystal. Finally, they play 'Shoot, BFF, Party With' with Siene, Bibiana, and Chelsea and discuss which of the awkward first dates they’d prefer in real life...

On their premiere episode for this season, Samantha and Jordana discuss why Arie is a skeevy bachelor. They name their top 5 moments from this episode and discuss this week’s contestants at length. They play Shoot Fuck Marry with Arie, Nick Viall, and DeMario Jackson and discuss how much they’d have to be paid to have ABC air their wedding on national television. Learn more about your ad choices....

The Betches discuss thew sea on finale of Bachelor in Paradise, the new Bachelor Arie, and play shoot fuck marry with ridiculous scenarios Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The Betches discuss the remaining couples on Bachelor in Paradise, the fact that Dean is not going to be the next Bachelor, our predictions for who it will be, and answer a listener email about meeting Daniel in person. We play would you rather about Taylor and Ben and Scallops and Jack Stone and end with a round of Shoot Fuck Marry Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices