The Back 9 - Midlife, Best Life.

Some of the most important conversations in a relationship don't happen because of conflict. They happen because life keeps moving. This week on The Back 9, the briilliant entrepreneur and financial advisor Henry Yoshida joins us to talk about the conversations couples—especially those in second relationships—need to have long before retirement arrives. Yes, we discuss trusts, beneficiaries, taxes...

After a divorce, many people wonder whether they'll ever build the kind of family life they imagined.  Dave Ryan got a second chance. On this episode of The Back 9, the longtime broadcaster joins us to talk about balancing a career that kept him on the road with fatherhood, what he learned from his first marriage, and how remarriage opened the door to a new chapter he never expected. He and his wi...

If you're in the middle of a divorce, or thinking about divorce right now, you need to listen to this episode. Not after it's over. Not when you've figured everything out. Right. Now. Geoff Fountain is in the middle of an 18-year relationship that is coming to an end. Two kids. A shared life. And now he's rewriting his future. And at one point, Geoff turns the tables and starts asking us questions...

This Father's Day week, we're doing something we've never done before. For the first time in Back 9 history, we have a full episode with just the two of us. No guest. No expert. No one else to play off of… It's just two guys sitting across from each other talking about what it feels like with our kids grown and living on their own, and looking back at the fathers we tried to be. We talk about rais...

Season 13 starts with an announcement: Over the past year, we've been building something bigger than a podcast — a book about how men heal, rebuild, and find healthy relationships after midlife divorce. It's now in front of major publishers, and the response has reinforced something we've believed from the beginning: Men need hope. This season will continue that conversation through stories about...

This season started with a daughter getting engaged, included 3 graduations, and ended with a toast by the campfire. That's what the 19th Hole is for. Every season, we take a breath and look back at the conversations that stayed with us. And this season had plenty. We talked about the pull of the wrong relationships after divorce. Knowing yourself before saying "I do." The discipline of co-parenti...

Paul Pabst has spent nearly 20 years producing The Dan Patrick Show, so yes…this episode has stories. Chris Rock refusing to leave the studio.
Clint Eastwood at Pebble Beach.
Dale Jr. admitting he got into racing because he wanted his dad to talk to him. But the story that stays with you? Paul named his daughter Peyton after Walter Payton.  And years later, he's standing at a Super Bowl party tell...

Ryan Vesce played professional hockey in six countries. He also went through back surgery, hip surgery, chronic pain and the kind of physical wear that ends a lot of careers early. What changed everything? Frustration. And then desperation. We talk with Ryan about hitting a point where "manage it" stopped being a good enough answer. So he and his strength coach started pulling best-in-practice ide...

Most people think culture just happens. But it doesn't.  This week on The Back 9, we sit down with Herbie Lopez, GM of Toyota of Hollywood, to talk about how he's built one of the top-performing dealerships in the country—and why the numbers aren't the point. Herbie shares how he got into the business after losing his father at 19, the influence of his uncle Tony, and what he's learned about leadi...

The hardest part after a divorce isn't always the divorce.  This week on the Back 9, we sit down with Dr. Barbark Kelly to talk about co-parenting, and why it's often the part of divorce that lingers the longest.  We get into what happens when youand your ex don't agree on what's best for your kids, how communication breaks down, and why a more structured approach can help steady things.  But more...

Great leaders don't rely on talk. They just show up. This week on The Back 9, we sit down with Coach Mark Soto — longtime football coach, mentor, and leader — to talk about what leadership actually looks like in real life, at home and on the field. Coach Soto shares lessons from decades of coaching and raising kids, including what it means to lead with humility, set the standard through your actio...

Most marriages don't fail because of surprises. They fail because we ignore the early signs. This week on The Back 9, we sit down with Kevin Thompson , marriage and life pastor at California's Bayside Church, to break down the real reasons relationships struggle, and how we can fix them before it's too late. Kevin dives into attachment styles, love patterns, communication breakdowns, and why the p...

Four marriages led to four divorces. You'd think a successful, well-known international life coach would know the signs. But when he met a former supermodel, he walked straight into a relationship he couldn't control, couldn't fix, and couldn't leave. Stephen Paul Edwards tells a story that's as seductive as it is destructive. His attraction was instant. The warning signs were obvious. The chaos k...

Dr. Achim Zinggrebe spent his life treating cancer—until he became the cancer patient. After being diagnosed with lymphoma, everything changed. Not just his own situation, but also how he saw medicine and how he viewed life. He realized that even in the middle of cancer, most of his body was still working for him.   That became the mantra of his practice.  Our conversation explores life after canc...

What if the hardest things you've been through weren't holding you back, but are instead shaping your strength? Author and Advocate Misty Carson joins us to kick off season 12, by challenging one of the most common beliefs around trauma: that it's something to "get over." Instead, she shares how trauma, adversity, and early instability can become the foundation for resilience, perspective, and pur...

We have spent years learning what it really takes to rebuild our lives —and find love again—after divorce. As Season 12 of The Back 9 begins, we reflect on why these conversations matter. After more than 100 episodes exploring all aspects of midlife transitions, one theme that keeps resurfacing is that divorce can shake a man's identity to the core. It's also the question shaping the book we're cu...

Have you noticed the moment when the Back 9 of life stops being a metaphor and starts feeling real? As Season 11 of The Back 9 wraps, we reflect on the shifts that come with midlife. Our daughters are grown. Our health and longevity feel personal. Time carries more weight. This season we explored fatherhood, friendship, identity, reinvention, and building the next chapter. In this 19th Hole, we tu...

What happens when the dream ends before you're ready? Heavyweight contender Joe Mesi once carried the pride of his hometown on his back.  They packed arenas, he had the Olympics within reach, and the path seemed clear—until a brain injury ended his boxing career overnight. Joe joins us to talk about the identity crisis that can follow when athletes lose the one thing they were built to do. We expl...

40 years of marriage. Three sons raised into men. This is the long game of fatherhood. Veteran sportscaster Vince Cellini joins The Back 9 for a steady, practical conversation about  healthy masculinity in fatherhood, long-term marriage and evolving identity in midlife. We talk about raising sons into capable men, balancing career ambition with presence at home, and staying consistent when work ne...

What happens when you achieve the life you planned… and realize you're still not happy? Kee Kee Buckley had the Hollywood executive title, the resume, the access, but she felt she had lost her identity.  When she got laid off she packed her Prius, grabbed her rescue dog Yoda, and drove across the country searching for Shama — the Sanskrit word for inner peace. On this episode of The Back 9, we tal...

Men need strong friendships.  Few of us are lucky enough to keep them for decades. On this episode of The Back 9, we sit down with Jim Brock Jr. — a 30+ year friend — to talk about the rare power of long-term adult male friendship and what it takes to stay connected through the peaks and valleys of life. What makes a friendship survive decades? What allows two men to be instantly available for eac...

What do you do when your industry shifts — and your 21-year run suddenly ends? This week, we sit down with longtime ESPN producer Gus Ramsey to talk about career pivots, layoffs, reinvention, mentorship, and retirement planning on the Back 9. After producing SportsCenter's most important shows during its peak, Gus was forced to recalibrate. Instead of chasing relevance, he focused on usefulness —...

Most relationships don't end because of one big blowup.  They end because too much goes unsaid. This week on The Back 9, therapist and author Colette Fehr returns to the show to talk about her new book, The Cost of Quiet, and why avoiding conflict can quietly push couples toward distance, disconnection, and divorce. The three of us dig into how "keeping the peace" turns into resentment, how intima...

What does it actually take to design a life you want? And do you earn your way to that clarity by going through the harder chapters first? We're joined by someone who can answer those questions.  Expat business coach and former federal criminal defense attorney Linda Perry has created a life that is a perfect model of what it looks like to build with intention. Linda shares how a 17-year career in...

On this episode we give you some bang for your buck, as we sit down with financial advisor Mike Gyzl of Cetera Investors to talk about a topic most families avoid until it becomes urgent: money. Mike explains the "retirement red zone," how to think about replacing a paycheck after work ends, and why the coming wealth transfer makes family planning more important than ever. We also dig into how to...