The Art of Charm

Stephen Mansfield (@MansfieldWrites) strives to inspire men to form a Band of Brothers around themselves to help them perfect noble manhood in their lives. The Cheat Sheet:Learn why most men in contemporary society don't have a best friend. Why does Stephen believe that men need an older brother figure? What is a Free Fire Zone? Discover why assembling a Band of Brothers keeps a man on course to b...

Dr. Duana Welch (@duanawelch) is known for applying social science to real-life relationship issues and is the author of Love Factually: 10 Proven Steps from I Wish to I Do, the only book that applies science to your love life from before you meet until you commit. The Cheat Sheet:Learn the four Attachment Styles and what they say about you and your relationships: Secure, Anxious/Ambivalent, Avoid...

Welcome to Fan Mail Friday #35! No jibber-jabber, just a short show where we answer Art of Charm listener mail and give out mini-lessons for the weekend! In this episode:What is the function of self-deprecation when striking up a new acquaintance, and how can you make people comfortable enough that they don't put themselves down while still valuing yourself enough not to do it, too? It's great tha...

Bob Arno (@bambivalent) is a professional pickpocket who uses his powers for good. How? Find out in this episode of The Art of Charm! The Cheat Sheet:How does someone without a criminal background become a pickpocket? What are the psychological differences between a mugger and a pickpocket? Why do pickpockets tend to spot law enforcement before law enforcement spots pickpockets? What kind of shoes...

Hugh Culver (@HughCulver) teaches us how we can think better, plan smarter, and act now on what really matters by developing Hero Habits. The Cheat Sheet:The first secret of success is to learn failure is temporary. Which pain are you more willing to endure: the pain of discipline, or the pain of regret? Habits are not created in 21 days -- habits are created with rewards. Modifying good habits to...

Welcome to Fan Mail Friday #34! No jibber-jabber, just a short show where we answer Art of Charm listener mail and give out mini-lessons for the weekend! In this episode:How do you deal with an overwhelming sense of envy that springs up whenever you encounter someone with more talent, better looks, or some other perk of an imagined "good life" that you feel you'll never experience? (Depending on y...

Lewis Howes (@LewisHowes) discusses his new book, The School of Greatness, and its framework for achieving real, sustainable, and repeatable success. The Cheat Sheet:What is a lifestyle entrepreneur? While interviewing successful people, Lewis Howes found eight common themes that they tend to share -- he calls them The Eight Principles of Greatness. Greatness looks different to everyone, but it's...

Kimberly Seltzer (@SeltzerKimberly) gives us her five-step process for finding a therapist who is right for you. The Cheat Sheet:We all need help from time to time; there's absolutely no shame in seeking therapy -- just as there's no shame in consulting a tutor if you need help getting through trigonometry or organic chemistry class. Finding a therapist is like finding a dentist or any other profe...

Alex Kouts (@akouts) returns to The Art of Charm to talk about how to get hired at a startup (and if the startup life might -- or might not -- be a good fit for you).The Cheat Sheet:What is a startup? How does a startup find a sustainable product/market fit? What kind of person chooses the potentially unstable startup life over the safer options their parents keep nagging them to consider? The sta...

Welcome to Fan Mail Friday #33! No jibber-jabber, just a short show where we answer Art of Charm listener mail and give out mini-lessons for the weekend! In this episode:Sometimes your partner will complain just to vent about something that's bothering them, and other times they want legitimate solutions to their problems. How do you tell one from the other? Emotional conditioning can be a powerfu...

Mark Manson (@iammarkmanson) is the author of Models: Attract Women Through Honesty, and he blogs to an audience of millions about psychology and personal development. The Cheat Sheet:Love is not enough; people prioritize love over other more important values, such as self-respect, trust, and boundaries. The relationship scorecard is toxic habit 1, where people feel as though they are always "owed...

Zachary Stockill (@zfstockill) shows us how overcoming retroactive jealousy and possessiveness is as easy as learning to let go. The Cheat Sheet:All jealousy is related to insecurity in some way. How should we deal with the complex cultural politics of social media in 2015 as they relate to retroactive jealousy? What are your values? Jealousy and possessiveness often cause us to stay in unhealthy...

Welcome to Fan Mail Friday #32! No jibber-jabber, just a short show where we answer Art of Charm listener mail and give out mini-lessons for the weekend! In this episode:While it might not be the end of the tunnel, it's good that you're seeing the light -- just make sure it's the right light. How do you practice genuine gratitude without coming across as a kiss-ass -- especially in the workplace?2...

Neil Strauss tells The Truth about past transgressions in his latest book, but it's more than just a head-cleaning confession -- it's an exploration of options most people probably haven't considered."Nobody's making you do anything. You have complete freedom of choice at all times. You just have to accept the consequences of that choice." -Neil StraussThe Cheat Sheet:We may look up to -- and even...

If you can learn to tell a good story, you can captivate any audience -- whether as a public speaker, while interviewing for a job, or when you're on a date. "If there's one big piece of advice that I have -- albeit I have a lot of them -- it's: make sure that you are driven to tell the story that you're telling." -Amy Port The Cheat Sheet: Even the best, most personal story can be lost in the han...

Welcome to Fan Mail Friday #31! No jibber-jabber, just a short show where we answer Art of Charm listener mail and give out mini-lessons for the weekend! In this episode:How do you learn to trust yourself and your instincts (especially when it comes to money)?A doctor brings a medical perspective to some advice we gave a listener in a difficult relationship back in Fan Mail Friday #27.Do phrases l...

Every interaction is a performance -- whether you're speaking up in a meeting, pitching a client, negotiating a raise, or walking into a job interview. Michael Port tells us how to steal the show."There's a benefit to being chameleon-like." -Michael PortThe Cheat Sheet:At its core, a good performance is genuine. (08:10)How do we separate our desire for validation from a desire to get results? (14:...

By recognizing in our own behavior what keeps us from being resilient against life's obstacles, we're empowered to stop the cycle and focus on what it takes to become mentally stronger."Every time you take your eyes off of your own goals and you start resenting somebody else, it's another minute that you didn't spend working towards whatever it is you want to achieve." -Amy MorinThe Cheat Sheet:Ho...

Welcome to Fan Mail Friday #30! No jibber-jabber, just a short show where we answer Art of Charm listener mail and give out mini-lessons for the weekend! In this episode:Contrary to popular belief, a lot of intelligence agents have trouble pulling off the smooth James Bond routine when trying to genuinely interact with people in real life. Sometimes, being embarrassed by and hating your "old self"...

Do you think of people who pursue their passions and make good money doing it as lucky? Chances are that Gary Vaynerchuk works a lot harder than you."Let me just clarify one thing -- I'm not lucky!" -Gary VaynerchukThe Cheat Sheet:How did a kid from the Cold War era communist Soviet Union manage to escape in the late '70s and become one of the hardest-working capitalists alive today? (06:03)For al...

Corporate culture is only as boring and stagnant -- or exciting and thriving -- as the people who create it."You can never really create culture...but you can design all these elements around it the same way you can design a house for the kind of interactions you want to have." -Robert RichmanThe Cheat Sheet:What is a culture architect? (03:53)Why should you care about corporate culture -- even if...

Stop worrying so much about where your inspiration is coming from and just create."People think that authors are writing exactly what they know, but I think a lot of times, authors are writing what they're trying to figure out." -Austin KleonThe Cheat Sheet:Are you more proud of the things you're doing today than the things you were doing a year ago? (04:52)Is any creative work truly original? (06...

"What men and women did to each other was beyond comprehension." -Charles BukowskiWelcome to Fan Mail Friday #29! No jibber-jabber, just a short show where we answer Art of Charm listener mail and give out mini-lessons for the weekend! In this episode:A new listener wants to know why we even have Fan Mail Friday. If we don't answer this to the satisfaction of any other listeners out there -- veter...

Meditation is for doers who seek personal top performance -- from entrepreneurs to professional athletes like Kobe Bryant."If you hand a top performer a potential advantage, they're going to try it." -Tony StubblebineThe Cheat Sheet:What benefits will life coaching offer the high-performing person vs. the low-performing person? (02:30)Meditation is more than a spiritual haven -- it's a mental stre...

Your talents, abilities, and intelligence aren't fixed traits -- they can be expanded and improved at any age with a mindset motivated toward growth."It's exciting to be progressing and doing things you never thought you could do; it's less exciting to just keep proving yourself over and over -- often by staying in your comfort zone." -Dr. Carol DweckThe Cheat Sheet:Learn the differences between t...