That Wasn't The Plan

Happy 25th episode, everybody — and welcome to the Season One Finale of That Wasn't The Plan. Emily and Courtney sit down to close out Season 1 the only way they know how: completely unscripted, slightly unhinged, and somehow still kind of profound. Courtney opens with a literal cliffhanger, lands the plane on a calm, clear decision about her own health at 46, and then the two of them spend t...

This week's guest , Jonathan Fitzgerald, showed up with a life story that none of us were fully prepared for. Jonathan grew up the middle child of ten in Sarasota, Florida, in a family that could only be described as a force of nature. His parents — both only children, for the record — moved to Virginia to help found a Bible college and wound up with 48 grandchildren. His father delivered sev...

(We open with Courtney's puppy accidentally getting marijuana poisoning. This is relevant because it sets the tone perfectly for an episode about a man whose life has taken approximately seventeen unexpected turns.) This week's guest is Richard Ault — and his coworkers call him the most interesting person in the world. After about ten minutes, Emily and Courtney stopped arguing with that...

No guest. No agenda. No plan. Just Emily and Courtney showing up, catching each other up on their weeks, and somehow covering: shoplifting ethics, a stolen Power Ranger backpack, a suspicious kid at Target, toad venom, recovery, sitting with your feelings, and a stroller left alone in a parking lot that may or may not have had a baby in it. This is one of those episodes that was never supposed to...

(Courtney's back, everyone. Let the drinks flow. Also — Courtney's tooth made a brief unscheduled disappearance. We kept it in. You're welcome.) This week, Emily and Courtney sit down with someone doing some of the most quietly essential work in grief support: Lindsay Brockman , licensed veterinary nurse, certified pet loss grief specialist, and founder of EverKin Pet Loss Support o...

(Fair warning: Emily's mouth was fully uncensored this episode — blame the tech gremlins. Also, our earrings nearly derailed the whole thing. You'll hear it. We kept it in.) This week, Emily's co-host Courtney Holland is out due to an emergency — but honestly, today's guest doesn't need a wingman. Hilary Morris Pawlik has been Emily's ride-or-die since the eighth grad...

Most of us learned to look at our bodies and immediately catalog what's wrong with them. Too big. Too small. Too much. Not enough. Wasting away. Filling out. The wrong shape for the wrong season for the wrong man's opinion. This week, we're trying something else. Two world-class athletes — ice mermaid and U.S. record holder Melissa Kegler and former NCAA swimmer Sarah Beth Wood — si...

Carrie Edwards bought a lottery ticket online (against her Army buddy's advice), let ChatGPT pick her numbers (also against his advice), forgot she'd opted into a second draw, and won $150,000. Then she gave every cent of it away. And $42,000 more out of her own pocket to cover the taxes. The story went viral worldwide — Tamron Hall, Inside Edition, Fox News, Korean headlines at her nail...

Last week, Melissa Kegler said she was going to get her record back. This week, the universe said, we’ll see about that. What follows is five months of waiting for water that is somehow both too warm and too frozen, a logistical nightmare involving flights, storms, dams, and one very specific 24-hour window where everything finally (and briefly) aligns.  It is, by all accounts, the worst swim of h...

There are people who set goals.  And then there’s Melissa Kegler—who hears a mildly unhinged suggestion and thinks, yes, that seems reasonable. In Part 1, we trace the origin story: from pool swimmer to open water wanderer, to casually knocking out the Triple Crown (Catalina, the English Channel, Manhattan… as one does). Along the way: crocodile-adjacent panic, questionable water conditions, dolph...

This week, we dispense wisdom. Some of it useful. Some of it… less so. From brain candy books and existential dread to air fryer eggs, dry skin trauma, and the radical notion of simply not giving up, Emily and Courtney share the life advice they’ve collected, ignored, rediscovered, and occasionally weaponised. There are thoughts on fear, presence, kindness, and why you should probably talk to your...

Courtney's tooth fell out again. Emily's hair is orange. Sarah Beth's pit bull has a pink belly. We're off. Somewhere in the middle of all that, we talk about Rosemary — Courtney's dear friend, gone two years this week. She spent her life helping traumatized kids and reminded us that hurt people don't just hurt people. Hurt people heal people. Then it gets weird (weir...

This week, we sit down with my friend Jen Quam Howell (JQ), who—on an otherwise unremarkable night—was woken up by her husband with the words no one prepares for: “The house is on fire. We have to go.” What follows is exactly what you’d expect and nothing like you’d expect. Three young kids. One terrifying exit down a burning staircase. A total loss. A hotel room that becomes “hometel.” And a comm...

Los Angeles, as it turns out, is less a city and more a series of increasingly poor decisions strung together by sunshine. This week, Courtney shares a perfectly normal collection of experiences: flagging down her own mugger, accepting a ride from a man who openly admits to past home invasions, being called a “loser” by a spiritual-looking stranger, and—naturally—being offered a glimpse of someone...

What happens when you grow up in a deeply religious household where sex is forbidden, masturbation is sinful, and heaven is apparently keeping score? You wait. This week we’re joined by our brilliant friend Sarah Beth Schooley Wood—champion swimmer, Antarctica bride, and (for a surprisingly long time) a very committed virgin. We talk purity culture, religious guilt, awkward first times, late bloom...

What begins as a chic business-class flight to Italy (because we’re grown now) quickly devolves into a transatlantic U-turn, a missing suitcase, an Amtrak sprint through Washington, D.C., a possibly intoxicated Uber driver declaring “Ma’am, I’m gonna get you there,” and approximately fourteen emotional breakdowns. There are trains. There are planes. There is public weeping. There is emergency ling...

At 22, Matt Holland dove into shallow water, broke his neck, and immediately knew something was very wrong.  This episode has it all: lake house chaos, a midnight helicopter ride, ICU absurdity, fingers-in-the-butt medical exams, and erections.  It’s funny. It’s uncomfortable. It’s very honest. And it’s about what happens when your body stops—but your will doesn’t. Support the show

This week, Colleen Heiber joins us to discuss being left before the wedding… and almost leaving someone herself. Six weeks out. Invitations printed. Rose petals purchased. Dumpster involved. We talk red flags, baby fever (and losing it), jam bands, online dating in your late 30s, youth-pastor energy, and the radical act of asking, “Are you sure?” It’s funny. It’s brutal. It’s hopeful. It’s proof t...

What begins as a casual conversation about hair drifts, quite naturally, into fake fangs, missing teeth, addiction, dentures, dental debt, sobriety, and one impressively pragmatic trip to Mexico shortly after losing all top teeth. It’s painful, absurd, and unexpectedly funny—a story about shame, survival, and rebuilding a smile without the benefit of enamel. Dental insurance, as ever, is the real...

Bed bugs: not a moral failing, not a cleanliness issue, and definitely not part of the plan. This week, we’re joined by Dr. Dini Miller—Virginia Tech professor, urban entomology legend, and all-around badass—to talk what bed bugs actually are, how people really get them, why panic makes everything worse, and what actually works. Equal parts horrifying, hilarious, and strangely comforting. Lint rol...

Just because children never blessed our loins doesn't mean we don't kinda like them. Well, we do, and we don't.  Babies, motherhood, and the quiet panic of doing life “wrong.” In Not My Circus , Emily and Courtney talk being child-free by choice, by chance, and by biology—with honesty, dark humor, rockin’ nipples, and zero judgment. A conversation about listening to your own small v...

Courtney’s original life plan was simple: keep drinking, keep using, quietly disappear. Sobriety was not the plan — but it turned out to be the thing that gave her a bigger, funnier, fuller life than she ever imagined. In this episode, we talk addiction, shame, strawberries, bad decisions, dark humor, and why getting sober didn’t end her life — it finally gave her a life worth living.  Show Notes:...

Both Emily and Courtney have had their run-ins with homelessness—sometimes more than once. This week, we delve into what it’s like to live without a roof over your head—and the bizarre blend of humor, humility, and resilience that comes with it. The little moments, the quiet dignity, and the unexpected things you discover about yourself when stability takes a hike. Honest, imperfect, and somehow m...

Friendship breakups: somehow more devastating than romantic ones, and with none of the sympathy cards. In Episode 2, we unpack platonic divorces, alcoholism, bad judgment, recovery, and how two former best friends managed to survive each other long enough to start a podcast. Poor choices were made.  Show Notes: Summary In this episode, Emily and Courtney explore the complexities of platonic friend...

Courtney asks Emily shallow questions about her breast cancer. We laugh and get real. It's not a joke until you wake up with a soul patch downstairs.  Show Notes: Summary In this episode, Emily White shares her personal journey of being diagnosed with breast cancer, detailing the emotional and physical challenges she faced. From the initial discovery of a lump to navigating the medical system...