TBTL: Too Beautiful To Live

Luke and Andrew discuss tissue box design, the unusual reason Luke's teachers hated him, why Andrew would trade 100 Mel Brooks for one Norman Lear, and whether TBTL needs to sue W. Kamau Bell. Plus, TOP STORIES: A Chinese city government cooks up the worst prank ever, and astronaut Scott Kelly learns something very interesting about a colleague's brush with space death.

Luke and Andrew add up all the hours and minutes they've spent waiting for various beats to drop and wonder what they've done with their lives. Plus, the newest Jeopary! star might be getting under Alex Trebek's skin. And Andrew tests Luke's Jeopardy! acumen.

Luke and Andrew dig into an expose on what never to order at your favorite chain restaurant. Also, a McDonald's sauce-related promotion causes chaos across the country. And Luke tries to help Andrew make sense of an ugly, ugly Browns world in this week's No Point Conversion.

Luke makes a new friend at a chain restaurant bar. Andrew defends one of the most maligned pop songs of the '80s. And they discuss a controversial piece of advice offered to new podcasters. Plus, it's a Friday, so you know we have some Music For Your Weekend.

Luke, back from his star-studded visit to Portland, is dropping names like Kenny Britt drops footballs. He and Andrew discuss a new Wu-Tang mystery, proper mic-handling skills, and why Steve Earl had to tell Luke to stop touching him.

It's a TBTL Morning Zoo as Luke and Andrew drag themselves out of bed to discuss their stress dreams, trailers for polar-themed animated movies, and the UK Prime Minister's awkward press conference.

Luke and Andrew usher in Trucktober with an appreciation of Tom Petty's life and career. They also dive into an incredible story about an SNL star's struggle with life and losing a role. Plus, Andrew falls for #fakenews, but Luke isn't feeling punitive.

David Burbank swings by Burbank Springs to talk to the boys about proper font choices, why he's reading The Lord Of The Rings for the seventh time, and whether it's okay to throw your dog poop in someone else's trashcan. And they break down the Seahawks and Browns games in this week's No Point Conversion.

Luke and Andrew admit to some pretty shady behavior on airplanes. They also discuss a list of the top 71 famous graduates from Luke's college...and whether he made the cut. And it's Friday, so we have some Music For Your Weekend.

Luke has a new exercise regime he wants to test out on-air. Andrew has some opinions about his friends' Facebook posts. And they discuss Velcro's new attempt to get people to *stop* saying "Velcro".

Luke and Andrew have a secret to share, but they don't know if they should. And they dissect one listener's list of least-favorite songs.

Luke swings by the studios of Walsh, Walsh & Doormat to start eating the lunch his wife packed for him (even though it's only 10am.) He and Andrew also discuss the latest scandal to hit a mediocre prime-time network television show. And: How Not To Hire A Handyman In Pittsburgh.

Luke's wife, Carey, joins the show to set the record straight on some things. Luke and Andrew also discuss the harrowing story of a college student who found himself trapped in a cave for 3 days. And in this week's No Point Conversion, they discuss the Seahawks loss this weekend and how players responded to the President's demands to stand during the national anthem.

Luke has a dilemma that only a pair of fake, rubber ears can solve. New research on bathroom towels has Andrew disgusted and vindicated. Plus, some brand new Music For Your Weekend!

Famous basketball player Kevin Durant got caught fighting with fans using a fake online name, but Luke and Andrew aren't mad at him. Plus, we finally hear the other side of the story of The Man Who Was Trapped In The Bathroom On A First Date And Ended Up Marrying The Woman Who Rescued Him.

Luke checks-in from Indianapolis, where he's reporting on a new park that is definitely not a park. He and Andrew talk about a woman in Colorado Springs who's public enemy #1 because of her bathroom habits. And Andrew made a salad today, but that's not really that interesting.

Andrew gets some bad news about one of his favorite neighborhood watering holes. Luke orders some very questionable business cards. And they learn why foreign diplomats in Cuba sometimes find mysterious "gifts" left in their toilets when they come home from work.

Luke had a shaving emergency minutes before going on stage over the weekend, which necessitated some creative use of antiperspirant. Plus, the guys discuss two examples of people really stepping up and "going for it", with very different results.

Andrew forces Luke to listen to more archival tape he found from Cleveland in the 1980s, and this time it pays off. Plus, a TBTL audio mystery, why the secret Wu-Tang album may not be a Wu-Tang album at all, and what makes LaCroix LaCroix. Plus, music for your weekend!

Andrew stumbled on some archival audio that he's excited to play for Luke. Luke is excited about a giant ball of disgustingness that's living below the streets of London. They discuss these topics and share a couple of pretty sad stories about fish.

Luke is trying to find a hat that looks like one in Dirty Dancing. Andrew's quasi-obsession with Monk is getting more Monk-y. Luke also weighs in on the new iPhone unveiling, which Andrew's apparently been having bad dreams about (that, and 7-foot bug monsters.)

A walk on his old college campus has Luke feeling almost overwhelmed with nostalgia. He and Andrew also discuss whether people should demand things ASAP, at EOB, or at OOB. Plus, an NFL sideline reporter finds himself an unlikely celebrity, and a listener shares her story of a first date and a secret bathroom.

Luke and Andrew get real about their long-term professional insecurities, as one does when one realizes one is a professional podcarter. Plus, Jim Carey tries to lay some Real Truths on an entertainment reporter. And No Point Conversion is back! Luke and Andrew break-down yesterday's double-loss by the Seahawks and the Browns.

Luke runs a soda-related experiment on Andrew, which results in both of them getting way too hopped-up on caffeine and sugar to finish the show. Also, Chili's has announced that it's cutting its menu IN HALF, but it's still way too long. And we're all playing right into Whole Food's organic little hands.

Luke and Andrew get into some nasty business today with a story about a woman who found herself in a very compromising bathroom situation on a first date. A listener writes-in with another related situation. And an Irish family tries to capture a bat in their house, and it makes for some fascinating audio.