TBTL: Too Beautiful To Live

Luke and Andrew find themselves on opposite sides of a debate over Thousand Island dressing and how it should be categorized. Plus, the internet delights in catching Ted Cruz doing very Ted Cruzy things, and a heroic mattress salesman in Texas throws his doors open to those who need shelter. 

Andrew's failed attempts to buy a pack of baseball cards may have just changed his life forever, or so he says. Plus, a couple of employees hit the wrong button and accidentally wire $900 million dollars and can't get it back. How's your day going? 

Luke and Andrew welcome a new, possibly non-existent group of listeners into the TBTL family. They also learn that blowing on Nintendo cartridges never really worked, and that Luke's favorite emoji is branding him as an Old.

Luke discovers a new global radio project and it's blowing his dang mind. Plus, a new film documents the last days of a dying shopping mall, and it's brilliant. 

Andrew does something very surprising on a snowy Monday in Seattle (hint: it's garbage day) and Luke is full of Fun Presidential Facts™️, including which President was criticized for not drinking enough booze.

Luke convinces Andrew to join him in a new venture, despite Andrew's misgivings. Plus, the snow is falling in Portland, so Luke provides the traffic and weather reports that you need to go about your day.

Andrew realizes that he's too old for modern light bulbs, and Luke has a new hero: A 90-year old man who took out a newspaper ad complaining about his internet service. 

Luke and Andrew share the internet's glee when a lawyer has to explain to a judge that he is not, indeed, a cat. Plus, Andrew uncovers a disturbing photo from his youth, and Alex Trebek's family is putting his wardrobe to good use.

Luke is in a one-sided relationship with a fancy store, and the Canadian government angered China with a Wu-Tang t-shirt. What a world. 

Luke watched all of the Super Bowl commercials and he has some opinions! (But please nobody tell Genevieve.)

This week's installment of Friday Inspiration! leads Luke and Andrew to their new favorite Australian Death Metal Band. Plus, Amazon's new CEO loves him some hot wings. What's so wrong with that?  

Luke hears back from his building managers after sending his Strongly Worded Email. Plus, an exploration of Lil Uzi Vert's new forehead diamond, which is very big and a little off-center

Luke sent a Strongly Worded Email to his building's management company and is starting to regret it. Meanwhile, Andrew is floundering around trying to remember a very specific Robert's Rule Of Order. 

Luke and Andrew call-up their Fact Checkin' Cuz in Minnesota to find out what's going on with another mysterious monolith that just popped-up there. Plus, listener Chris witnessed something that nobody should ever have to witnes

Luke's family is getting into some pretty exciting emoji action on their text chain. Speaking of phones, Luke is playing a very dangerous game with his this week. 

Luke is mortified by something he just learned about his new apartment, but -- thanks to some motivational advice from an unlikely source -- he is pushing through. Plus, a listener shares his own experience with GameStop stock. 

Luke and Andrew discuss what they would do if they were approached by a stranger offering them a free COVID vaccination while stuck in traffic. Because that happened in Oregon recently. Plus, Luke's nieces write-in with some pretty solid knock-knock jokes.

Yesterday's GameStop Wall Street story has blown-up, and now it also involves AMC Theaters and Bed Bath & Beyond. Luke and Andrew credit their early reporting on the matter. Plus, science has an evolutionary answer to why we always feel like we're in a hurry. 

Luke and Andrew delve into the fascinating (and somewhat confusing) story of how a bunch of Redditors are trying to protect the video game store GameStop from greedy investors. Plus, you ever wonder how that old Nintendo Duck Hunt gun worked? 

Luke and Andrew say goodbye to Larry King, who's provided TBTL with so much content over the years. They also dig deep into Pacific Northwest Taco Chain Culture. 

Andrew's quixotic quest to find his favorite Dick Clark radio show takes him on an audio adventure while Luke discovers his new favorite public radio show of all time. Plus, Dakota Johnson was just kidding when she said she loves limes. But shouldn't we already have known that?

Luke and Andrew stumble on an honest-to-gosh TBTL Mystery involving a Donor of the Day. Plus, Luke is embarrassed about something he said on yesterday's show, and a Weird Al Yankovich song from 1983 teaches him something about the world of music. 

Luke and Andrew harness all the power of the podcasting medium to bring you live, breaking coverage of today's presidential inauguration after the fact. Plus, we learn why a bunch of pigeons died during Nixon's big day and how John Adams and Thomas Jefferson saved their bromance. 

Alec Baldwin says he's leaving Twitter after his American-born wife was outed for adopting a dubious Spanish persona. Luke and Andrew are joined by a guest who is ready to defend Hilaria Baldwin against her hordes of Twitter haters. Plus, Joe Biden might not be allowed to bring his Peloton bike into the White House. Maybe.

Andrew and Luke celebrate the best Cleveland Browns season in a generation, which came to a disappointing end yesterday. And they look ahead at the future of the Browns and Seahawks.