Table Talks with the Tares

Every couple has that one thing from the past that keeps coming back into the present.  For us, it surfaced right as we were getting ready to host family, with little margin left. If you've ever felt the past flare up right when life is already full, this episode meets you there. You'll watch us catch the spiral, name what's really underneath it, and find our way back. And you'll walk away with a...

What if the pushback is the point? Your spouse pushes back, and the instinct is to get defensive. Genesis calls a spouse a helper, but the Hebrew means something closer to a helper who stands opposite you. The friction isn't a glitch. It's the design. We get into how to turn all that pushback into something you build with, instead of something you brace against. Resources: Jeremy Pryor’s Article:...

Some days are for laying bricks. Others are for making sure you’re not tearing down the walls. Some days we feel like we’re nailing it. Other days are monotonous, exhausting, and frustrating and suddenly we’re showing up in ways we didn’t mean. Anyone else? Proverbs 14:1 gives clear warning that a wise woman builds her house, while a foolish ones tears it down with her own hands. So, even on the u...

Most family stress doesn't come from the big moments. It shows up in the ordinary transition moments nobody has a clear plan for. In this episode, we get honest about the 4 daily transitions that were derailing our family life. Not because our kids were misbehaving, but because the expectations were never actually taught. They were just repeated. Every. Single. Day. We talk about what was missing,...

The hard part isn't the fight. It's figuring out what the fight is actually about. In this episode, we talk about what happens when an old pain gets bumped and the reaction that comes out has nothing to do with the person standing in front of you. You'll Walk Away With Why some reactions feel bigger than the moment and what that might be telling you. What it looked like when this showed up for us...

Spoiler: physical touch doesn't mean what you think it does. In this episode, we talk about the breakdown that happens when we try to love each other well but are speaking different languages. You'll walk away with: Why it’s easy to default to your own love language even when you know better The real moment this showed up for us and how we worked through it One thing to say when you can feel the c...

Have you ever meant well and still missed the mark? You didn't need a solution. You needed someone to listen and somehow that got lost. In this episode, we dig into one of the most common friction points in any close relationship: the moment one person needs to be heard and the other instinctively tries to help. It's not a communication problem. It's a mismatch in expectations. And one small quest...

It started with MJ saying we need to take more risks as a family and somehow that turned into tent camping with a baby. In this episode, we talk about why having strong rhythms isn't just about running a tight ship; it's what gives you the freedom to shake things up, try something hard, and actually recover from it. Plus, it’s a practical way we're teaching our kids to take measured risks. You'll...

Good intentions don’t automatically create the outcome you hope for. MJ tried to give Ash a break but the rest didn't actually restore. In this episode we unpack why good intentions miss when people recharge differently, and the real difference between rest and restoration. You'll walk away with: How loving your partner well means learning how they refuel The difference between rest and restoratio...

This episode is for everyone who's doing the right things and still feels like they're running behind because that's been us lately. We're getting honest about what happens when the timeline you set for bouncing back from postpartum (your health, your family rhythms, your social life) just doesn't hold. Spoiler: ours hasn’t. Here's what we're unpacking: Why “bouncing back” takes longer than we wan...

Sunday nights started feeling kinda tense… like we were already behind before Monday even hit. We realized it wasn’t our schedule, it was us being out of sync. Different expectations, missed communication, and all the other little stuff that adds up fast. So, we started asking 3 simple questions before the week starts. It’s helped us get on the same page and cut down a lot of unnecessary friction....

Giving a real time health update and what it’s actually been like after 3 pregnancies. We talk about the pressure to “bounce back,” why we’re pushing against it, and what a slower, more sustainable approach to health looks like. If you’ve ever felt stuck and discouraged when it comes to your health journey, this one’s for you. ‌ Resources mentioned: ‌ Next episode recommended: https://podcasts.app...

How do you handle stress in your relationship and how do you show up when your spouse is the one feeling it? This week we’re talking about how we’ve learned (and are still learning) to navigate stress without letting it take over. From recognizing each other’s signals to supporting without fixing, we’re sharing what’s helped us stay grounded and connected when life feels a little chaotic. ‌ Resour...

We just celebrated 10 years of marriage with a cabin trip… and brought all three kids along. 😅 It was a blast and also a little reality check. We’re debriefing what we expected vs. what actually happened, where we maybe overshot things for this season, and how we’re learning to adjust expectations so they match real life with littles. If you’ve ever tried to make something special happen and ende...

Everyone says they need more margin, but who actually takes time to create it? In this conversation, we talk about how stacking small habits has helped us build rhythms that create real buffer in our lives. Not perfectly, but enough to breathe, rest, be present with our kids, and show up for others without feeling constantly maxed out. If your life feels full to the brim, this one might give pract...

We’re talking about how love and respect land differently in marriage and how that showed up in a recent conflict for us. Turns out, it’s not just what you say but how you say it that matters too. We unpack how tone, timing, and delivery can completely change the message, and what we’re learning about speaking in a way so the other person feels respected. Based on a recent conversation we had, you...

In this episode, we talk about the tension of speaking truthfully while still speaking lovingly, especially when dealing with people who have narcissistic tendencies. We share some of what we’ve learned through living with Gram and navigating those dynamics day to day. It’s an honest conversation about compassion, speaking truthfully but lovingly, and how we try to hold both at the same time.    ...

It’s crazy how two people can live the same parenting moment and have totally different instincts. In this episode, we talk about how our differences show up in real time especially with ADHD in the mix. From structure vs. spontaneity to handling everyday chaos, we unpack where our approaches complement each other and where we think, “Wait… you’re doing what?” ‌ Next episode recommended: https://p...

Why do we hesitate to ask for help and how do we know if we’re actually showing up well in our roles as husband, wife, mom, or dad? In this episode, we put those questions on the table. We talk through expectations we carry, the reality of limited capacity, and how we’re learning to meet each other’s needs without keeping score. It’s an honest conversation about roles, communication, and working a...

Ever notice how the same situation can feel completely different to two people? In this episode, we talk about how our differences don’t just come from personality but culture too. Growing up with NY and Filipino backgrounds means we often interpret conflict, respect, and even apologies in totally different ways. We unpack the Western justice/guilt framework vs. the honor/shame perspective common...

In this episode, we realized we don’t actually think about “stuff” the same way. One of us leans toward practicality… the other notices the brand. What is that really about? We talk through how status subtly pulls on us, how it shows up in purchases and preferences, and why certain things feel important even when we know they probably shouldn’t.   Resources mentioned: Watch: Panthère de Cartier wa...

Valentine’s Day hits different when you’re sleep-deprived and surrounded by tiny humans! In this episode, we reflect on how love looked when we first started dating vs. what connection looks like now in a low capacity season. From shifting expectations to finding small moments that matter, we talk about how we keep choosing each other through every stage of life. ‌ Next episode recommended: https:...

In this episode, we’re talking about our approach to homeschooling and why we’ve fallen in love with the Homeschool Made Simple method. It’s research-based, interest-led, and literature rich which has brought so much simplicity, freedom, and actual joy to our days. Whether you're deep in homeschool life or just curious what it could look like, we’re pulling back the curtain on what’s worked, what’...

In this episode, we open up about how we think about money, what matters to us, what systems have worked in different seasons, and what still trips us up (spoiler: it’s not just the coffee budget). We’re sharing the real talk behind aligning priorities and figuring out finances as a team. If money convos usually stress you out, this one’s for you. Resources mentioned: Budgeting app mentioned: http...

In this episode, we’re breaking down where we’re at with our health goals. We talk about our journey from keto to strength training, what postpartum has looked like the 3rd time around, and how we’re (slowly) able to prioritize working out again without going to extremes. If you’re trying to get back into a rhythm with your health and need a reminder that slow is still progress, this one’s for you...