Sum On Sleeve Podcast

Breastfeeding stressed me out. It was tiring and lonely. It was a mental game that I played with myself every day. So I exclusively breastfed my daughter 2 weeks shy of 6 months. I completely weaned her on my birthday as a gift to myself. It was one of the HARDEST things I’ve ever had to do in my life. I’d say those first weeks were pure torture, physically, emotionally and mentally. During the fi...

I was browsing my Twitter and I saw a post from novelist, Celeste Ng sharing her essay in The Cut about being harassed for marrying a non-Asian man. I am a Chinese-Canadian woman married to a Chinese-Canadian man and we have a daughter. So as the acronym goes, we are AFAM (Asian Female, Asian Man). As our daughter grows up, I want her to feel confident in choosing whoever she wants to date, figuri...

In my life, I’ve been called many things. Growing up in the 90s in a predominantly Caucasian community, I got the usual questions and comments. We’ve come a long way since then and I’m fortunate I grew up at the tail end of much worst times. So I’ve been a victim of racism but I’ve also been called a racist. Let me explain.

Ah, toxic girlfriends. From Clueless to Mean Girls to Gossip Girl (is it Pretty Little Liars now?), do these only appear in the teenage years? No. These appear through to adulthood, from college/university to the workplace to motherhood to old age (who’s a better grandma?). Granted, a lot of that nastiness starts in high school and I think some women just never learned their lesson. I wish my mom...

When you want your kid to grow up tough enough to face the world but you don’t want to become your parents…What do you do? Growing up with Asian parents, we were often taught that perseverance and hard work were the keys to success and that nothing is easy when it comes to reaching our goals.  These values hold close to my heart because I believe that in order to achieve our goals, it takes e...

How translating for your immigrant parents actually makes you more emotionally intelligent Have you ever seen an Asian mom and her kid at a restaurant and the kid is ordering for the both of them in perfect English and then confirming it with his/her mom in their native language? I was that kid and still am. How has that affected me as an adult and as a mom?

For me, the first year of motherhood was all about survival, keeping my head above water and recovering from a lost sense of identity:  Is being a mom the only role I’ll have from now on? Will my boobs ever go back to normal? What happened to my independence? My second year was all about managing schedules, efficient timelines, ticking boxes, getting things done in a short period of time, con...

Have you ever been to a Coach outlet? Or an Aritzia sale? Who do you see? What are stereotypical Asians obsessed about? Gucci, Prada, Louis Vuitton…Purses, sunglasses, clothes, shoes, cars…stuff, stuff and more stuff. Materialism is rampant across all cultures; however, Asians have been stereotyped as being extremely materialistic. This perception is blatantly demonstrated in Kevin Lee’s web show...

The quiet, submissive Japanese businesswoman; the self-sacrificing, man-pleasing Chinese wife; the docile, needy Korean female international student. Whenever I hear these stereotypes, I first cringe in disgust knowing that these are some people’s fantasies; then, a wave of anger hits me like a ton of bricks, mad about the misconception media has played in creating them. I am an Asian woman. But I...

First of all, I don’t judge a parent for sharing pictures of their kids on social media. It’s a personal choice and ultimately, it’s what works for their family. I don’t know how many photos and videos I have of my daughter but I know there are a lot. Like other new parents, everything our kid does, it’s like freaking Christmas. Holy crap, she burped. OMG, she’s got a snot bubble. Awww, she’s fall...

Did you hear about the shooting in that town? What about that woman who was murdered on her way home from work? Or that country that keeps massacring its own people? No – most likely, I wouldn’t have heard it because I don’t pay attention to those stories. It’s not like I’m a recluse or an ostrich hiding its head in the sand It doesn’t make me ignorant either because if you look at the definition...

It’s being at work and feeling guilty about not being at home. Then it’s being at home and feeling guilty about not being at work. The goal of a ‘working mom’ is to balance both the working part and the mom part. When did that become the goal? Why is it about balance? It’s as though when an effort is put into one role, the other role suffers, like a lose-lose situation. Why can’t it be about doing...

I’m going to preface this by saying this list is based on the assumptions that my daughter decides to have a kid and that I will be alive when this happens. I know this may not happen but I like to put these thoughts into words in case it does. This is so that if she does become a mom in the future, we can read this together and she will either make me eat my words or validate these thoughts I hav...

Dating sucks. There is no sugar coating it. So I’m going to be brutally honest and let you in on some dating secrets for finding the one.

I’m sure you’ve heard of Asian people celebrating Lunar New Year. And I can probably write about how I celebrate it with my family (the red pockets, food, family traditions, stories etc.) like a typical mom blogger. Instead, I want to talk about Luck.

A touching story of how my grandma’s death inspired my mom to take control of her health Here is the final part of my collaboration series with Tiny Eyes Comics. Hope you enjoy!

It’s hard to say ‘I Love You’ to my parents but my mom and I have figured out a way to make it work. Here is part 2 of Why I Love My Mom series

Tiny Eyes is a comic series that shares slices of everyday life from a Chinese perspective. The series aims to create a fun, intimate and authentic space for those who are curious about China. I was inspired by these comics so I reached out to Siyu, the artist behind Tiny Eyes to collaborate. I love how her comics give me a fun and light-hearted way to understand my culture better. There were so m...

So I don’t eat breakfast. I never ate breakfast when I was a kid. I do brunches with girlfriends and my husband makes a mean breakfast on the weekends (breakfast is his life; he can’t function without it). I love eggs, bacon, french toast, pancakes…all the good stuff. I just don’t eat it in the morning because I’m not hungry. When I was in grade 3, I had to do a homework assignment where we drew p...

I knew my maternity leave was going to end. I just didn’t know how I would feel in that moment I had to go back to work.

Mary Ng is the Member of Parliament (MP) for Markham-Thornhill & Minister of Small Business and Export Promotion. She is a trailblazer as one of the first Chinese Canadian female cabinet ministers. And, she is a self-proclaimed fan of my Blog (What What?). She was out in Vancouver and wanted to meet me. So we had coffee, chatting about our family and our shared hopes and dreams for empowering...

I don’t touch other people’s kids without asking their parents or the kid themselves first. First of all, kids are gross. I know kids touch everything and anything. Aside from being a mom, I’ve been a babysitter, a camp counsellor, a tutor, a piano teacher and a tennis coach for elementary school kids. Their grubby, sticky little hands have been in their nose, their ears, their mouths, handrails,...

Why is Sum spelled that way? Why am I here? Where am I? Who am I? Maybe not that question unless you’re having an existential crisis…but perhaps listening to my podcast will help. If you’re Chinese, have Chinese friends or ever been to Vancouver, you’ve probably heard of Dim Sum. For those who don’t know a lick of Chinese, Sum is ‘heart’ and Dim is a ‘point/dot/small bit’.  And all together,...

FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out) is an actual reason why millennials overspend. Are you freaking kidding me? People my age spend money because they have a “fear of missing out on” What? Like that beautifully pictured cappuccino and notebook placed precisely on the edge of a table? Or that perfectly timed photo of someone mid-jump on top of a mountain, looking super cool and dangerous?

drink, drink, drink! From the workplace to hanging out with friends, it’s so easy to succumb to the pressure to drink. So I don’t enjoy drinking alcohol. Some people might be like, “Seriously? And you’re a mom? How do you do that?” I hate the taste of alcohol. It’s extremely bitter and I feel like I’m doing the cough syrup gag every time. I look like a cherry tomato about to burst in pictures (Tha...