Stress Smarts with Colonel Deb

Aloha Friends! In Episode 1 of The Aloha Adventures with Colonel Deb, I begin exploring the deeper meaning behind my book: Why Is Pono Not Pono Today? From my home in Hilo, Hawai‘i, I introduce three powerful Hawaiian concepts:   • Aloha – living with love   • Pono – being in balance   • Kuleana – taking responsibility and action Together, they form a simple yet powerful way of understanding how w...

Come along on a journey from my home in Hilo, Hawai‘i as we explore the story behind my book, Why Is Pono Not Pono Today? What looks like a simple children’s book reveals powerful lessons about stress, leadership, and living with aloha. Each episode shares a piece of the story—and the deeper meaning behind it, along with lessons we can apply in everyday life. This podcast season is based on my You...

What’s the most powerful thing you bring into every room? It’s not your resume.  It’s not your title.  It’s your energy. Your energy shows up before you speak. It lingers after you leave. And it either lifts people up — or wears them down. In this episode of Stress Smarts with Colonel Deb , we explore how energy influences leadership, relationships, stress management, and performance under pressur...

What if the worst thing someone said about you… wasn’t true?  And even worse — people believed it? Accusations can hit like a punch to the gut. Whether they’re true, false, or weaponized projections, they have the power to undermine reputations, damage relationships, and trigger deep emotional pain. In this episode of Stress Smarts with Colonel Deb , I share deeply personal stories from West Point...

Shortcuts may save you time. But when it comes to life, leadership, and legacy—the fastest way isn’t always the smartest. Especially when people are involved. In this episode of Stress Smarts with Colonel Deb , we unpack the myth of shortcuts and the hidden costs of cutting corners. From military operations to team leadership, I’ve seen firsthand how rushing decisions, skipping stakeholders, and c...

Some people think standards are about rules.  I think they’re about life and death . In this episode of Stress Smarts with Colonel Deb , I share why minimum standards aren’t enough—drawing from real-world experiences at Khobar Towers, the Pentagon on 9/11, and the Miracle on the Hudson. In engineering, military operations, leadership, and everyday life, standards determine whether people walk away...

Have you ever been in the right place at exactly the right time—without planning it?  Or followed a nudge that made no sense… only to realize later it changed everything? That’s not luck. It’s synchronicity —and it may be life’s way of getting your attention. In this episode of Stress Smarts with Colonel Deb , I share powerful personal stories of timing, intuition, and alignment, and introduce the...

You followed the rules.  You worked hard.  You stayed kind, showed up early, and gave your best. And still… something felt unfair. In this episode of Stress Smarts with Colonel Deb , Doug and I talk honestly about fairness—not as a slogan, but as a lived experience. From West Point to leadership decisions, from everyday frustrations to deeply painful injustices, we explore what to do when life doe...

What if you could spark meaningful change—without a title, a stage, or permission? In this episode of Stress Smarts with Colonel Deb , we talk about what it truly means to be a Catalyst . Not the loudest voice in the room. Not the person forcing outcomes. But the steady, grounded presence who refuses to ignore what’s broken—and takes a small step that changes everything. Through powerful stories f...

Have you ever felt crushed when something didn’t turn out the way you expected? In this episode of Stress Smarts with Colonel Deb , we talk about how unmet expectations — in love, work, money, health, or relationships — can quietly drain our energy, hijack our emotions, and change the course of our day… or our life. Through deeply personal stories from my own journey — from early marriages and fin...

Ever feel like you’re working harder and harder… but not getting the results you hoped for? In this episode of Stress Smarts with Colonel Deb , we talk about leverage — not financial leverage, but the kind that helps you move the “immovable” parts of life when the odds feel stacked against you. From high-pressure leadership experiences to everyday stress, I’ll share how leverage allows you to work...

Have you ever made a split-second decision that changed everything? In this episode of Stress Smarts with Colonel Deb , we take an honest look at the choices we make under stress — the fast, automatic decisions influenced by fatigue, pressure, fear, and emotion. Through a powerful real-life story, I share how decisions made in moments like these can have lasting consequences… and how slowing down...

Change is unavoidable. But what if every change—even the hardest, most disruptive one—carried a hidden opportunity to grow stronger? In this powerful episode of Stress Smarts with Colonel Deb , we take a fresh, honest look at CHANGE —from financial setbacks and health crises to divorce, moves, career shifts, caregiving, loss, and unexpected life turns. Through deeply personal stories and real-life...

What if the person standing in front of you—whether a child, a teammate, or even yourself —had far more potential than you could imagine? And what if you had the power to help unlock it? In this deeply personal episode of Stress Smarts with Colonel Deb , I share stories from my own life—beginning as a little girl in a Navy uniform who couldn’t yet see her future, to leading in combat against the o...

Always giving… but never recharging?  Feeling stretched thin, depleted, or last on your own list? You’re not alone. In this powerful episode of Stress Smarts with Colonel Deb , we explore why Self-Care isn’t selfish—it’s essential. When your energy is gone, your joy, patience, clarity, and compassion disappear with it. But with the right tools, you can refill your energy without losing yourself. Y...

Have you ever been caught off guard by someone talking behind your back? It’s one of those moments that can steal your energy—if you let it. In this episode of Stress Smarts with Colonel Deb , we talk about backbiters : the people who judge, criticize, or tear others down from the shadows. From grade school to the military, nonprofits to personal relationships, I’ve seen how painful and distractin...

Ever feel like you’ve been holding it all together—and then one more thing happens, and it all falls apart? In this episode of Stress Smarts with Colonel Deb , we’re talking about what to do when you’ve hit your limit. From caregiving and command to crisis and chaos, I’ve been there—and I’ll share what I’ve learned about staying calm when life piles on. You’ll learn my 5-step B.R.E.A.K. method , a...

What if the smallest act—a quiet gesture, an extra dessert, a kind word—could stay with someone for a lifetime? In this moving episode of Stress Smarts with Colonel Deb , I share a personal story from my cadet days at West Point, when one man’s simple act of kindness helped me survive one of the toughest times of my life. His name was Jorge Chavez , and his quiet care created a ripple that still t...

When was the last time you stopped long enough to feel pure joy? In this heartfelt episode of Stress Smarts with Colonel Deb , I open up about a surprising moment when I couldn’t name five things that brought me joy—and how that realization changed everything. Life can be overwhelming, and joy can seem like a luxury. But the truth is, joy isn’t optional—it’s essential fuel. You’ll learn my J.O.Y....

What if leadership wasn’t a title—but a test of who you are when everything’s stacked against you? In this deeply personal episode of Stress Smarts with Colonel Deb , I share my own journey of leadership—from the early days at West Point when I was told I didn’t belong, to the hard-won lessons that came from serving with and learning from incredible people in uniform and beyond. You’ll hear storie...

What if the fastest way to create real change—in your life, your relationships, and your work—wasn’t telling, pushing, or fighting… but asking the right question? In this episode of Stress Smarts with Colonel Deb , I share why questions are our ultimate empowerment tool —and how asking better questions can instantly shift your results.  You’ll hear personal stories from my leadership journey, from...

Relationships come in all forms—family, friends, teammates, coworkers, and partners—and every one of them is an experiment . Each interaction teaches us how to connect better, communicate clearly, and care more deeply. In this insightful episode of Stress Smarts with Colonel Deb , I’m joined by my husband, LTC Doug Adams, to explore what we’ve learned from 26+ years together—through deployments, c...

What if your current strategy in life is perfectly designed to get you exactly what you don’t want? In this episode of Stress Smarts with Colonel Deb , we’ll explore how to think more strategically about your life—so your effort finally leads to progress, not frustration.  You’ll learn how to recognize “interception strategies” (the patterns that sabotage your success), adjust when things go off c...

Confidence isn’t something you’re born with—it’s something you build. Yet too many talented, capable people hold back, waiting to be “perfect” before they begin. In this episode of Stress Smarts with Colonel Deb , I’ll share how confidence grows when you take action, learn from the messy parts, and lead from a place of service.  You’ll hear how to silence overthinking, push past fear, and strength...

Why is it that with some people we connect instantly and deeply, and with others we sense something’s off, especially under stress?  The answer often comes down to values. In this episode of Stress Smarts with Colonel Deb , I’ll share why values are the foundation of trust, and how they shape our relationships, our leadership, and our resilience under pressure.  You’ll learn how to strengthen your...