Social Skills Coaching

It’s important to avoid using language that triggers defensiveness. This includes things like “what’s wrong with you?” “I’m sorry you feel that way,” “whatever,” “you’re overreacting,” “you’re entitled to your opinion,” or anything using absolute terms like “always” and “never.” These are invalidating and inflammatory and will be met with resistance, emphasizing emotional barriers rather than diss...

We often think we know what we want based on singular experiences, stereotypes, or simple social pressures. But we are typically very, very wrong. In fact, most of the time, we are just making educated guesses. Psychological distance is deceptive, and we often confuse what we want with what benefits us from a self-interest standpoint. In reality, what we do know is simply what we don’t want. This...

Most of the communication that takes place between people is non-verbal in nature. What people say is often a poor indicator of what they want to convey, which makes people-reading a valuable life skill with almost endless benefits. Although we’re all blessed with different aptitudes, it’s possible to develop this skill in ourselves, as long as we can be honest about where we’re starting from. • N...

An integral part of crystal-clear thinking is to be open-minded. Being open-minded means hearing evidence or an argument and not making an instant judgment. It means being able to say, “I don’t know” and resist that feeling of uncertainty. These are all difficult because we are wired to do the opposite. Hear it Here - https://adbl.co/3n6a2fz Show notes and/or episode transcripts are available at h...

Active listening techniques help us to absorb, understand, remember, and respond to what we’re told. This includes non-judgment, reflection, paying attention, seeking clarification, summarizing, and possibly sharing your own experience. Hear it Here - https://bit.ly/IntentionalCommunicationKing Show notes and/or episode transcripts are available at https://bit.ly/social-skills-shownotes Learn more...

A study specified the traits that predicted the most relationship success if similar: agreeableness and emotional stability. Conventional wisdom says that opposites attract, but for successful long-term partnerships, shared values and similarity in interest, communication, preferences, etc. are usually more valuable. Hear it Here - https://bit.ly/ScienceOfAttraction Show notes and/or episode trans...

Most of the communication that takes place between people is non-verbal in nature. What people say is often a poor indicator of what they want to convey, which makes people-reading a valuable life skill with almost endless benefits. Although we’re all blessed with different aptitudes, it’s possible to develop this skill in ourselves, as long as we can be honest about where we’re starting from. No...

In the Imago framework, we seek to remove emotional barriers to connection by communicating. The Sender and the Receiver takes turns sharing their message. The Receiver listens by mirroring, validating, and communicating empathy as the Sender speaks. Then, they change places. The key is to be patient, don’t interrupt, and avoid trying to be the Sender when you should be acting as the Receiver. Hea...

Your perception is biased. Understanding the world around you is probably biased because of how the brain jumps to conclusions. These types of jumps are called cognitive biases. They seek to create a story out of as little information as possible, to avoid uncertainty. Battling cognitive biases involves telling stories in reverse, slowing down, and shifting your focus to questions instead of decla...

The triangular theory of love states that the most successful relationships score well on all three metrics: attraction, intimacy, and commitment. Happy couples need to have strong overlap and match in their “triangles” or else work to strengthen their weak points. Hear it Here - https://bit.ly/ScienceOfAttraction Show notes and/or episode transcripts are available at https://bit.ly/social-skills-...

Practice conversational patience, listen to others, and give them the space to be as they are. In other words, cut out the ego! You can validate others by asking questions every time you’re tempted to jump in and hog attention. Relax, slow down, and have the self-discipline and compassion to let the conversation unfolds as it will, rather than as you think it should. Hear it Here - https://bit.ly/...

Your perception is biased. Understanding the world around you is probably biased because of how the brain jumps to conclusions. These types of jumps are called cognitive biases. They seek to create a story out of as little information as possible, to avoid uncertainty. Battling cognitive biases involves telling stories in reverse, slowing down, and shifting your focus to questions instead of decla...

Love is what most of us marry for, but arranged marriages have been around for a very long time. In fact, what most of us would consider romantic love is a luxury that is only a few hundred years old. Arranged marriages work precisely because love is placed as a low priority. Instead, commitment, problem-solving, and lowered expectations take the forefront and create conditions that allow for a ha...

Humility is the virtue that will allow you to quickly and sincerely own up to mistakes. This takes courage and maturity. Make sure any apologies show remorse, repentance, and full responsibility, as well as explain what went wrong, what you will do to fix it, and a request for forgiveness. Accept any response to your apology with grace. Hear it Here - https://bit.ly/IntentionalCommunicationKing Sh...

Your perspective isn’t reality. It represents your subjective and unique worldview, but it’s not objective, it’s not reality, and it is destined to be skewed in terms of your experiences. Some experiences are solidified in what are known as schemas and heuristics, which are the frameworks you use to organize and understand the world. Hear it Here - https://adbl.co/3n6a2fz Show notes and/or episode...

• Dr. Jack Schafer’s friendship formula states that people build connections when they are in proximity to one another, when their interactions are frequent and long in duration, and when both parties get their needs met. • Schafer’s theory can be applied to flirting, especially in contexts where the three-part flirting process wouldn’t be appropriate. • Whichever approach you use (short-term flir...

With curiosity, we stay open-minded and humble, and approach others in a spirit of opportunity, respect, and the desire to learn. Express genuine interest in someone by asking open-ended questions and really listening to the answers. Don’t assume, let people speak, and check your comprehension by paraphrasing. Hear it Here - https://bit.ly/IntentionalCommunicationKing Show notes and/or episode tra...

• Usually, your brain, instincts, gut feelings, emotions, and hunches are all liars (usually). They aren’t doing it on purpose, but they inherently function by jumping to conclusions, saving time, conserving energy, and valuing speed over accuracy. Their goal is to function on less information, and the less of it, the better. Not quite crystal-clear thinking. • Your feelings and emotions can overp...

the art of getting the attention of the opposite sex Hear it Here - https://bit.ly/ScienceOfAttraction Show notes and/or episode transcripts are available at https://bit.ly/social-skills-shownotes Learn more or get a free mini-book on conversation tactics at https://bit.ly/pkconsulting #ApproachStage #AttractionPlay #Fisher #FisherByrne #HumanInteraction #MentalAttraction #Synchronize #TimothyPerp...