So I was Told

We start with a scientific (read: chaotic) burger debrief. Skechers’ burger sits at a respectable 7/10 while Sonic takes the walk of shame, then spiral into a ramen taxonomy masterclass: Hokkaidō miso broth vs. Hakata, thin-firm vs. thick-chewy noodles, spice levels that flirt with danger and why “cheap chicken broth” isn’t always a red flag. Then I blindfold my co-host for a field trip to a Maid...

Charlie Kirk was killed while answering a question about transgender mass shooters on the first stop of his “American Comeback Tour.” In those final moments, he repeated a lie, that trans people are a major driver of mass shootings even though they account for just 0.11% of such incidents over the past decade . Seconds later, gun violence. The very epidemic he defended claimed his life. In this ep...

So I was told freedom is doing whatever you want, whenever you want. But what if that’s the biggest lie we’ve bought into? In this episode, I break down how indulging in every craving doesn’t liberate us, it enslaves us. We’ll talk dopamine, addiction, and the “hedonic treadmill” that keeps our brains hooked. We’ll look at how capitalism profits from keeping us dissatisfied, why discipline is actu...

Most people think the purpose of life is to “find yourself” or “chase your happiness.” That’s why most people are still miserable. In this episode I dig into the hard truth: self-centered living is a scam. Backed by decades of research from the Harvard Study of Adult Development to Viktor Frankl’s Man’s Search for Meaning, we’ll unpack why a life that revolves around you is guaranteed to be empty,...

What would it feel like to live with no secrets? To wake up without rehearsing lies in your head or guarding a version of yourself from the world? Your secrets are not protecting you; they’re draining you. Every secret is weight you carry, energy you waste, and shame you feed. In this episode, I cut through the myth that secrecy keeps you safe and get real about why it actually keeps you stuck. So...

The headlines aren’t letting up. From climate disasters and political chaos to the creeping feeling that we’re running out of time. But giving up isn’t the answer and blind optimism won’t save us either. In this solo episode, I break down Adaptive Hope. The flexible, grounded, and stubborn kind of hope that can actually survive in times like these. We’ll talk about what Adaptive Hope is, why it wo...

We live in a culture that glamorizes being “always on.” But behind the hustle, the hyper-productivity, and the constant stimulation is a nervous system in crisis. In this episode, I unpack how we confuse overstimulation with personality and why that confusion is burning us out. We talk dopamine loops, trauma responses, nervous system basics, and what it means to rediscover yourself beneath the noi...

We need to talk about the obsession with red flags. It's frustrating how, “healing” became about seeing danger in everything and calling it discernment. But what if the thing you’re calling a red flag… is just fear? Or discomfort? Or your nervous system reminding you of stories from your past? In this episode I dig into the difference between intuition and hypervigilance, explore how insecure...

In this heatwave fueled fever dream of an episode, the conversation goes off the rails almost immediately and never really returns. You can literally here the descent into madness. Blame the non-existent AC or the slow descent into sweat-soaked delirium, but today’s topics range from Big Bang denial and simulation theory to AI bros, tiny prehistoric humans, Arrowhead water red flags, and the possi...

What do Roblox, Donkey Kong, and yelling at your friends about Trump have in common? Apparently, everything. In this second part of our discussion with @birdlets we cover digital intimacy, youth activism, and why memes aren’t enough to save us. This episode is chaotic, heartfelt, and exactly what you need to hear when you're caught between hopelessness and action.

It’s July 4th, but don’t expect fireworks. Expect facts. Today we confront the lie at the heart of “American freedom.” From land theft to forced labor, from mass incarceration to queer erasure, this country has rationed liberty based on race, gender, and class. We’re talking real history because love for a place means holding it accountable, not covering it in red, white, and denial. Show Notes: M...

We've got another special guest episode here; things start off unserious and end somewhere heavy. Tattoo sessions, text threads, British tea vs testosterone—nothing is off limits as we welcome Eva (@ birdlets , they/them) to the pod. Together we unpack the covert (and not so covert) harassment that’s become routine in the service industry, the collective instincts women and femmes develop to survi...

The airstrike on Iran didn’t just hit the news, it detonated across TikTok. We look at the psychology of digital panic , the architecture of algorithmic fear , and the slippery slope from information to indoctrination. Not all viral is vital .

There were a lot of things I believed about manhood, control, friendship, and faith— or so I was told. Most of it? BS In this episode, I unpack the five things I wish someone had told me before the shame, the self-sabotage, and the silent suffering took root. We get into toxic masculinity, performative faith, the danger of being the “contrarian,” and why therapy cracked everything open. This one’s...

In this episode of So I Was Told , we rip the mask off fascism. Not the cartoonish kind from history books, but the subtler, modern forms that worm their way into policy, media, and everyday culture. From the rise of white nationalist rhetoric in government to book bans disguised as “parental rights,” we explore how authoritarian tactics are being rebranded for a new generation. We’ll break down t...

In the finale of the Idol Series, we turn the mirror inward. What happens when the last idol left standing is...ourselves? This episode confronts the seductive pull of hyper-individualism, the myth of self-made salvation, and the spiritual exhaustion of always being our own answer. We explore how the performance of autonomy can become its own trap—where every boundary, every goal, every ritual is...

What if the thing you’ve been craving most, being chosen, was never the real prize? In this episode of the Idol Series , we unpack the deeply embedded belief that being “the one” will finally make us whole. Whether it’s romantic validation, parental approval, or just being picked above the rest, many of us have built our self-worth around someone else’s selection. But what happens when the person...

In this unreleased episode, we dig into how Christianity , as it exists in America today, came to look so little like the teachings of Christ. This is an unfiltered look at how empire, colonialism, and patriarchy have long used religion to justify subjugation and power. We talk about the historical roots of American Christianity, the weaponization of tradition, and how faith morphed into a culture...

What happens when healing stops being human and starts becoming holy? In this episode of the Idol Series , we unpack how personal growth morphed into performance, how the pursuit of wholeness became its own religion, and why the wellness industry would rather keep you chasing than arriving. From curated vulnerability on Instagram to the high priests of self-help culture, we explore how “doing the...

We all want to be seen, but what happens when that desire becomes doctrine? In this episode we explore how praise, likes, and external approval have become the new holy grail. From dopamine loops to identity distortion, we break down the neuroscience, psychology, and soul-level consequences of living for applause. This is about more than social media. It’s about how we build ourselves in front of...

In this episode, we explore the concept of idolatry—not just in religious terms, but how we place value on external things and people, and how that defines our identity. From sexual identity to consumerism and hyper-individualism, we discuss the dangers of idolizing what is fleeting and how it affects not just our personal worth, but the communities we belong to. Tune in for a deep dive into how r...

We’ve been taught there are only two options: be selfless and good, or selfish and bad. But what about the space in between? In this episode, I dig into the messy, misunderstood terrain between giving too much and not giving a damn. We’ll talk about the ways selflessness can turn into self-abandonment, how setting boundaries can be mistaken for cruelty, and why choosing yourself doesn’t make you t...

Happiness...It's the goal in every ad, the promise behind every “how to fix your life” post. But what happens when chasing it leaves you emptier than before? In this episode, I get honest about what happens when happiness becomes the obsession and why I’ve started choosing joy instead. This isn’t a step-by-step guide. It’s a reflection. A reminder that peace isn’t always loud. And maybe what y...

In this episode I talk about words — the ones you say to yourself in the mirror and the ones you whisper into someone else’s storm. From self-sabotage disguised as “real talk” to affirmations that literally rewire your brain, this episode breaks down the psychology and spirit behind speaking life. We’ll unpack why your inner voice matters more than you think, how to build a habit of uplifting othe...

What if the future you’ve been told to accept… isn’t the only one available? In this episode, we rip up the blueprint of the world we’ve inherited and dare to imagine something better. Inspired by the concept of the card Collective Future Dreaming written by author Yumi Sakugawa, I explore how unjust systems have shaped the path ahead and how radical imagination, healing, and collaboration can shi...