Sensitive & Self-Assured | Confidence | Set Boundaries | Self-acceptance | Find Your Purpose | Self-esteem

You're sitting in a meeting. You have a thought, a question, an idea worth sharing. Then the filter kicks in. What if it's a dumb question? What if I should already know this? What if I upset someone? You say nothing. The meeting moves on. You leave feeling invisible, even though you had so much to offer. This isn't a confidence problem you were born with. It's a learned pattern, often one that st...

For decades, my guest couldn't stop absorbing the emotions of everyone around her - her clients, her students, and even strangers in a room - and it took her years to understand she wasn't broken. She was highly sensitive, and no one had ever taught her what to do with that. In this conversation, somatic therapist and counselor educator Alexandra Goldwell shares what three decades of working with...

Lately, I’ve been having similar conversations with several of my clients. They find themselves back in old habits and old thought patterns they were sure they'd already worked through, and the frustration that follows can be brutal. There's this quiet shame that creeps in, like the work was supposed to be finished by now and certain challenges should have been resolved for good. So today I'm revi...

You're in a room full of people you genuinely like. A topic comes up. You have something real to say. And then the internal checklist starts. Is this the right moment? Will that sound weird? What if they disagree? By the time you've run through all of it, the moment is gone. You say nothing. You leave early. And the next three days, you replay everything you wished you had said. Today I’m talking...

There's a voice inside. You know the one. The one that shows up when your needs feel like too much, when you're convinced you're a burden, when you're replaying a moment everyone else has probably already forgotten. And instead of offering yourself any grace, you listen to it. You agree with it. You let it win. In this episode, we're talking about what it means to have compassion for yourself, not...

In Part 2 of my conversation with Trisha Veldman, we pick up where we left off and move into some of the most thought-provoking territory of the entire conversation. We discuss being the movie star of your own life, what it truly means to be powerful and poised, and a perspective on creativity and overthinking that I genuinely have not been able to stop thinking about since we recorded. In this ep...

Have you ever felt like your sensitivity was something to apologize for? Like you owed the world an explanation every time you needed to leave early, skip the late night out, or take fewer clients than your colleagues? If so, this episode is for you. In Part 1, I sit down with Trisha Veldman, confidence coach, spoken word poet, TEDx speaker, and founder of Powerful and Poised, for an honest and de...

What if the most radical thing you could do for yourself was simply allow yourself to be seen? In this deeply personal and inspiring episode, I sit down with boudoir photographer Vanessa Isenbarger, a woman whose lens has transformed the way countless women see themselves. With over 15 years behind the camera, Vanessa has built more than a photography business. She has created a sacred space where...

Last week we talked about the discomfort of speaking up for what you want and need. This week, we're continuing that conversation because speaking up is a hard thing. And hard things? Sometimes we avoid them because we think it’s easier, but the truth is the easy route costs us more than we realize. On May 2, 2026, I crossed the finish line of a half-marathon that has lived on my goal list for nea...

In this short but intentional episode, I'm walking you through the thought process behind changing the name of this podcast from The Highly Sensitive Woman to Sensitive & Self-Assured, and why this shift feels more honest about where we've always been headed. The original name served its season. But over time, I found myself wanting to lead with a destination rather than a label. So many of us...

Have you ever stayed quiet about something small only to watch it snowball into something much bigger in your mind? You're not alone, and this episode is for you. I'm revisiting one of my favorite episodes from last May, but first I'm getting real about something that happened to me recently, because even after years of doing this work, I still fall into old patterns sometimes. I stayed silent abo...

What if the thing you spent years trying to hide is actually your greatest gift? In this episode, Allyssya sits down with award-winning business coach, speaker, and Forbes Coaches Council member Sara Gilbert to talk about what it really means to be a highly sensitive woman and why it might just be the most powerful thing about you. Sara opens up about growing up feeling like her sensitivity was a...

Have you done everything "right"? The journaling, the retreats, the personality tests, the conversations with mentors, and still feel like your purpose is just out of reach? You are not alone, and it is absolutely not a failure of effort. In this episode, we explore why the traditional tools for finding purpose often fall short, and what might be getting in the way. The truth is, purpose isn't som...

You know her. The woman who seems calm in hard conversations. The one who doesn’t spiral, doesn’t overthink, doesn’t fall apart. And somewhere inside, a quiet question rises: Why can’t I be more like that? In this episode, we move beyond the usual advice to “just stop comparing yourself” and take a deeper, more honest look at what comparison is doing beneath the surface. Because it’s not really ab...

In this episode, I’m joined by someone who has shaped my personal journey, especially during a pivotal time in my life.   Diane McDowell is a therapist of 25+ years turned relationship coach, and she’s also the person who first introduced me to the concept of being a highly sensitive person. That moment gave me language for something I had felt my entire life, but never fully understood.   Togethe...

If you’ve ever told yourself “I’m just not creative”, this episode is going to gently challenge that belief. In this conversation, I’m joined by creative wellness coach Lexi Reid, who works with high-achieving women in STEM to ease stress and burnout through simple, accessible creative practices. With a background in science and regulatory work, Lexi shares how she rediscovered creativity not as s...

Have you ever made a decision… and then immediately started questioning it? You send the text, set the boundary, make the choice, then your mind jumps in: “Did I say the wrong thing?” “Was that the right decision?” “Should I have done something differently?” If this feels familiar, you’re not alone. In this episode, I’m continuing the conversation from last week on decision-making, and focusing on...

For many highly sensitive women, decision-making can feel overwhelming. We want to be responsible. We don’t want to waste time. We don’t want to make the wrong choice or disappoint someone else. So we think…and think…and think some more.   But what if the idea that there is a single “right” decision is actually the thing keeping you stuck?   In this episode, I challenge the belief that decisions a...

This week’s episode is a special one. 🎉 The Highly Sensitive Woman is celebrating its one-year anniversary, and I’m reflecting on what this past year of podcasting has taught me about growth, courage, and the power of taking action. When I launched this show on March 13, 2025, I had no idea what would come from it. But I knew one thing for sure: the process of creating it had already begun to cha...

What if calming your nervous system could be simple… and nearly invisible? In part two of this rich conversation, I’m back with certified life and weight loss coach Nan Saysana to move from awareness into action. Nan shares the gentle sensory regulation techniques she teaches her clients - practical tools you can use anywhere to quiet the stress response and feel more steady in your body in real t...

What if your struggle with food isn’t actually about food at all? In part one of this powerful conversation, I’m joined by certified life and weight loss coach Nan Saysana. She helps women who lift weights stop binge eating and feel proud of their bodies without deprivation, shame, or obsession. Together, we explore the emotional roots of overeating, what it really means to “people please with foo...

In this reflective post–Valentine’s Day episode, I explore how getting clear on your needs, preferences, and emotional desires can transform every relationship in your life - romantic, familial, and friendships alike. Through personal stories and gentle self-inquiry, this conversation highlights the difference between vague traits and lived experiences, the power of identifying non-negotiable need...

In Part 2 of this conversation with Ashlea Dillard, firefighter-paramedic turned Licensed Professional Counselor and Certified Clinical & Transpersonal Hypnotherapist, we move from understanding stress and survival mode into what healing actually looks like.   Ashlea shares how people-pleasing often develops as a coping strategy, why so many women struggle to prioritize themselves without guil...

What happens when a highly sensitive woman builds a career in one of the most high-stress, male-dominated professions and begins to realize her body is paying the price? In Part 1 of this two-part conversation, I’m joined by Ashlea Dillard, firefighter-paramedic turned Licensed Professional Counselor and Certified Clinical & Transpersonal Hypnotherapist. We explore what it was like for her to...

Feeling frustrated with yourself for not wanting what you’re “supposed” to want leaves you feeling drained and unsure of yourself. Recently, I had a moment that stopped me in my tracks: realizing a fitness goal I was pushing myself toward wasn’t actually my goal, it was a suggestion from a fitness app that I quietly adopted and then judged myself for not meeting.   This pattern may feel familiar....