Seaside Pod Review (A Queen Podcast)

Fool in the Rain, The Fool on the Hill, Ship of Fools, What a Fool Believes, Fool for the City, Everybody’s a Fool, Fool if You Think It’s Over, and Fool in Love. Every fucker and their dog seems to have a fool song for the love of gods! Well, Queen wrote one. Kinda. Brian wrote one actually, and he wrote it in his dentally-inclined pre-Qeen musical project, Smile; a band that had a dashingly hand...

He needs some cool tunes, not just any will suffice But they didn't have Randy Woods Band, so he bought Def Leppard twice Now cruisin' in his Caravan, he sees homies as he pass But if he looks twice, they're gonna kick his lily ass That's right folks, we're talking about Dexter and Noodles and all the rest of the crazy gang that made up the darlings of the pop punk band "The Offspring". But not th...

The Attack Dragon (Draco ferox) is a large, obligate quadrupedal dragon distinguished by a dense, osteoderm-reinforced hide and an elongated cranial structure optimized for both intimidation and prey capture. The skull supports a double row of recurved, serrated teeth that are continuously replaced throughout the animal’s life, while a heavily muscled neck allows for powerful lateral strikes. Its...

He's making a list, he's checking it twice, he's gonna find out who's naughty and nice. Who is the fat, judgmental prick and who does he think he is passing judgment on the rest of us? He works one day a year and then oversees an Elven sweatshop the rest of the year cranking out shitty plastic toys that he grudgingly disperses from his heaving sack and we're all supposed to be impressed???? I thin...

Brideshead Revisited: The Sacred & Profane Memories of Captain Charles Ryder  is a novel by the English writer Evelyn Waugh, first published in 1945. It follows, from the 1920s to the early 1940s, the life and romances of Charles Ryder, especially his friendship with the Flytes, a family of wealthy English Catholics who live in a palatial mansion, Brideshead Castle. Ryder h...

Once upon a time, there was a small wooden puppet who dreamed of being a dancer. All his puppet friends told him "You'll never be a dancer! You lack the requisite dexterity because of your inarticulate limbs!" The little wooden puppet wouldn't listen and set out to the big city to find a dance master to help him accomplish his dreams. For 12 days and 12 nights he journeyed, by hill and by stream,...

Deacy wrote some absolute bangers for Queen. Another One Bites the Dust, Spread Your Wings, Your My Best Friend. But he also wrote a few more mellow tracks like In Only Seven Days and this week's track, "One Year of Love", which was his only sole-writing credit on A Kind of Magic. His two co-writes with Freddie from the same record, well... we weren't fans. Mainly because they're absolutely terrib...

The Cardinal is promising to be 10% nicer to Mrs. Cardinal but I'm not convinced! We talk about the sadly departed Jimmy Cliff and how you really had to be a very good musician back in "the day" (not sure which day that was or what the cutoff is, but hey, you know what we mean!) We also get another scintillating format idea from Kev and Randy contends that we really are a couple of agreeable...

Randy's keeping it tight and to the neat! He'd also like to buy the world a coke - but Kev's not having it! Our movie review section could become another pod within a pod (possibly a pod within a pod within a pod if we do it during the kofi episodes!) and along the way, hats are fucked and Kev's status as an international podcaster is yet again highlighted by Randy as a cause for celebration. We t...

The one where Kev gets back from Gainesville. And Randy sticks the boot in. Repeatedly! We also have a very important hard drive update from the Cardinal in which he lets us know whether he's been able to salvage all those fart noise sound effects he's been working on for the past couple of decades. Also, Randy recommends documentaries, but only one's he's never seen! We'd sure appreciate it if so...

It's time to look back at another forty songs that we've covered. We'll talk about where we agreed, where we disagreed, and go through our ten favourite tracks from those last forty! We also had our listeners offer their picks and collated them on our website so we could figure out exacrtly how wrong you all are! The song at the end is the final track from Randy Woods Band's self-titled debut albu...

Get your tomatoes in people, winter is upon us!!! There's the usual buffoonery; The Cardinal is having problems with his "drive" and Mrs. Cardinal probably isn't happy about it! Kev's heading to a show next year and we dig into the finer points of lyricism and whether it's all just a big old bag of bollocks! Oh, and somewhere in there, we also talk about the last song written solely by our hero, F...

We get into the thwackfuck, which Kev's not having and has decided to fix next year. Randy's been at communist headquarters again getting all bolshie and shit. Tay Tay rears her inoffensive head, we talk at some length about the relative merits of panning in popular music, and we're introduced to a band from the 60s that neither of us have listened to named "Love". And look, we like love. We might...

The one where Randy tells Kev about some fella who dangles low, Kev has to take an impromptu citizenship refresher and passes with moderately flying colours, we hear from Lord Percy, and we decide that all things considered, Regina is top tier and we're probably better off as we are. We also dig into the third single released from The Works, Freddie's Game-era-esque ballad, It's a Hard Life! If Ke...

At the height of his local celebrity, Prince signed a record contract, made fat stacks, got pissed off at the fatter stacks that the fatter cats were making and took all his toys and went home! That has very little to do with today's episode other than a conversation about how artists are treated by the industry, but we also talk about the relative attraction of baseball and why it's definitely no...

RIGHT! Stop that! It's all too silly! We get invaded by another podcast, there's plenty of radio talk and the boys go back to their childhoods to talk about the use and abuse of Walkie Talkies! The Dad jokes are back and Randy's radio retrieval ruination really rather rattles us! Aside from all that, we manifest, we spin the wheel, and we talk about a Queen song. I mean why the hell else would you...

The last episode was the last song on the last album released by Queen with Freddie. This episode SHOULD have been the last song on the last album released by Queen with Freddie. Nary a dry in the house when listening to this one in December 1991 folks. There are allegations from Randy, we establish Kev's bone fides as an actual accredited Group Musicology Expert, and there's a lot more talk about...

Burt Reynolds, Dick Dale, Cliff Richard, and fuck me if it isn't Hank Marvin with his red Fender Stratocaster! We talk about surfin' USA, surfin' UK, and surfin' SK. Surfin' UK is problematic because you have to fight the frigid north sea, a frankly terrifying volume of wee beige jobbies bobbing along beside you, and then the disdain and ridicule of your friends! Surfin' SK also has its chall...

We're heading into heavier territory with this week's song courtesy of the greatest postman Scotland, or possibly the entire United Kingdom, has ever known. 568,421 positive reviews on ratemypostie.com can't be wrong! What does the Don have for us this week? Well, it's a band that Kev liked for a bit when he was younger but hasn't kept up with and certainly a band that the Cardinal most likely isn...

We're going back to a time before Queen records existed. To a time when the summer of love had wound down but Leon Russell was still tokin'. This one is a song he wrote for Joe Cocker, who released it as the first single from his self-titled second album. November Rain is brought up again, for some ungodly reason and we discuss the relative merits of mic-ing toms from above or below for a tedious...

It's the last track from the last canonical Queen album and don't let Corey Morrissette tell you any different. Cosmos Rocks is NOT a Queen album Corey!!! What kind of infantile buffoon carries on an argument with a podcast co-host in the episode notes of a completely different podcast? Me, that's who! But I digress. I also dye grass. And Dai Glass is a mate of mine from school! Shit, my mind wand...

Seaside Pod Tofu! So adorable... Seaside Pod Tofu! Whoo hoo! Seaside Pod Tofu! Give us a bit... Confused? Well strap in, this one goes all over the ice! We're talking Gaga, we're talking tofu, we're talking French, et Randy essaie de suggérer qu'il est aux commandes et que Kev est l'acolyte ! It's all going on over at seaside towers. One of our boys though has a fairly major problem with the synth...

Finally! We're getting to the spandex and hot alient chicks! Seemingly, there is no reason for these extraordinary intergalactical upsets. Only Cardinal Randy Woods, at TCOGFY, has provided any explanation! Is Flash's Theme the greatest movie theme of all time? We're not gonna say it isn't. We get into the weeds about gender-swapping songs, live versions, and kazoo solos courtesy of our congregant...

We come up with the perfect name for Nickelback's Greatest Hits (which, if there were any sort of decency in the world would be a blank CD that you can just burn some Queen onto!), we solve one the great philosophical questions of the age regarding soap, we invent a new product line, and we have a bitey, punchy, and cool time doing it! Also, we ruminate on the relative merits of having four fuckin...

Half a league, half a league, Half a league onward, All in the valley of Death    Rode the six hundred. “Forward, the Light Brigade! Charge for the guns!” he said. Into the valley of Death    Rode the six hundred. What does that Tennyson bloke know about it anyway? He wouldn't know a pinched harmonic from a pinched nerve and I bet he's never had to synch up multiple A...