Scratch That: Parenting & ReParenting Off Script

Hi, friends! Happy Monday💛 As Caitlin prepares to to welcome their new little human into the world, we are sending you a little signing off episode with a found poem that emerged from all of the conversations we've gathered since we kicked this thing off last year. Thank you for being along for the ride! A Scratch That Poem *Note: Every line from this poem is linked to the Scratch That episod...

Tatum Tricarico embodies a set of identities we don't always see together – she is a proud Disabled person, a Queer woman of faith, and a recent graduate from divinity school on her way to becoming a pastor. Tatum knows, first-hand, a lot of the wounds disabled and queer people have felt inside religious communities, and she's here to offer all of us – the ones on the outside and inside –...

If you've listened to this podcast for three minutes, you know that we are big-time, long-time fans of author/illustrator Tyler Feder ( Bodies Are Cool , Are You Mad At Me? , and Dancing At the Pity Party: A Dead Mom Graphic Memoir ) . Tyler has a unique ability of finding the simplest, sturdiest revision to break open the one-dimensional world in which we often live. Today, we talk with her a...

Barry Lee 's art is beautiful without being precious, whimsical but sturdy, absurd and deeply relatable, disrupts traditional beauty standards and is absolutely stunning. As a disabled and non-binary artist, they offer us a bright and playful world with a warmest, gentlest gut-punch. There was SO MUCH we wanted to talk with them about. Like when did Barry learn to separate from their body? How...

Have you gone through a big life change that has left you feeling disconnected from yourself? Maybe it's becoming a parent? Or a new illness/diagnosis? Maybe it's a new job or moving to a new city? It's so easy for us to lose ourselves when we confront these kinds of personal shifts, let alone all the great wide forces in the world. It's easy to get lost with new restrictions on ti...

Is seeing yourself through the eyes of others your default setting? Are you highly attuned to the ways you're perceived? Same, baby. Same! In this episode, Caitlin tells us about the practice of self-portraiture as a tool for generating self-reflection/care/awareness/compassion for ourselves. There are plenty of reasons people resist this kind of witnessing, but, as we talk about here, it migh...

It's true! Can you believe it? We've been sending these conversations out into the world and through your speakers for a year now! Today we take a beat to reflect on the experience, pulling out steady threads and big-takeaways. We play a few clips that we're still thinking about and lift the lid on the noise, pressures, and messy insecurities we've bumped into while making this pro...

Kate Bingaman Burt is so many things – illustrator, educator, parent, head of the Graphic Design program at Portland State University, and founder of the coolest risograph printing press and studio, Outlet PDX . She's also been drawing every day since 2006. Today we ask her how she melds these worlds together. How did becoming a parent affect her identity as an artist? How does her art practic...

Do you ever feel like you're doing it wrong? Like everyone else has it figured out, and you're the only one flailing? Today we open the can of worms that wriggle around when we compare ourselves to the ones around us. Why are we so good at noticing our own lack, but not our abundance? What do we miss out on when we strive to match instead of living our unique values out loud? What do we do...

As Caitlin prepares Charlie to welcome a sibling into the family, we delve into a swirly conversation about these complicated relationships. How much, if any, control do parents have over siblings relationships? What can parents do (or not do) to foster positive, long lasting relationship between their kids? How did our sibling relationships shape us? And how does that history inform the way we th...

Do you get heart palpitations just thinking about planning a kids' birthday party? Or wish all your days didn't just blur into a big bowl of mush? Today we take a careful and curious look at how we mark moments, big and small. How can we do this with a little more intention and a little less stress?? Tune In to Hear Up Talk About: 🍋 The inexpensive and spectacular ways Caitlin's mom m...

Y'ALL. Today is the day! We bring you our chat with writer, artist, dancer, quilter, human, our favorite buddy, and the one-and-only – Cody Cook Parrot!! From the ways they're learning to reparent themselves around money and the discomfort they feel in class jumping to the buoy they feel in trans love and weirdo community, Cody meets us with open-hearted transparency and LOL warmth. For mo...

On today's episode, we dive into our postpartum experiences, piecing together in hindsight what happened and why. Caitlin offers the plans they're building to set themselves up for sturdy support this time around. The stories we share are tender, the reflections wobbly, and the plans hopeful. Tune In to Hear Us Talk About: 🩺 The overwhelming lack of medical curiosity or understanding abou...

Today on Scratch That we are the ones being interviewed! Caitlin's wise and warm BFF, Kaplan Trudo is wading into the process of deciding whether or not to pursue becoming a parent and wants to hear from us. How did we decide we wanted to become parents? What does it feel like to co-parent with another person? They dig in with questions we never thought to ask before becoming parents ourselves...

We gave ourselves a homework assignment – huddle up with our partners and our kids and write a little family manifesto. How simple! How fun! How sweet! LOL. Turns out it might be a bit trickier than our rosy idealism pictured. Today, we share the ragged and the spectacular parts of the experience, offer up the manifestos we made, and brainstorm what we want to try next time. Tune In to Hear Up Tal...

This episode is a happy goodbye to all the good parenting goals we are sending off to sea. There is only so much we can prioritize, so much energy, so many battles to fight and hills to die on. Today, we each share three parenting goals we really do value, but can't value enough to keep beating our heads against the wall for. Mentioned In Today's Episode: Sarah Knight's TED Talk "T...

Today on Scratch That we chat with the tender and wise trailblazer S. Bear Bergman . We found Bear when we fell head-over-heels in love with his parenting book, Special Topics In Being a Parent . Unlike so many parenting advice we've read, Bear's approach felt adaptable and possible. It was only after we booked our interview that we realized Bear is a BFD. A founding member of the very fir...

How do we talk to our kids about war, death, families being separated, floods, guns, violence, any of it? Should we shield them as much and as long as possible? Should we hold their hand as we tell them what we know to be real? How do we balance protecting our kids with equipping them? These questions feel important, the stakes feel high, we're doing our best, and making it up as we go. Today...

A year ago, Kate Wieners quit her corporate job to open a cozy, plant-filled bookstore, Monstera's Books . And while it sounds like the pitch for a movie we'd all love, today Kate talks with us about the real-life, fleshed-out story. What stars had to align for her to leave the "good enough" setup she already had for the risk of a dream? What has it been like to be a partner and a...

What does living alongside a toddler reveal to us about our high school and college students? How does time in the classroom inform the way we approach learning with our pre-schoolers? On today's episode, we reflect on our experiences teaching and learning and cobble together a list of guiding principles. Tune in to hear us talk about: ✨ Curiosity as sacred. ⏱ The cost of separating places an...

As we kick off Pride month, we turn over what it means to bring a new person into a scary world, especially as a queer parent, and the ways pregnancy has helped Caitlin understand and live out their gender. Tune in to hear us talk about: 🫢 A super big announcement! ❓ Asking questions to understand the ways we experience pregnancy and parenthood differently. ⚖️ Caitlin processing the need they fe...

Today on Scratch That we chat with one of the most beloved couples on the internet – Squirmy and Grubs ! (Also known as Shane and Hannah Burcaw 🤗) They talk with us about what it's like to share their personal lives with an enormous following, how they cope with internet hate and real life ignorance about disability/relationships, why they wrote their new book Interabled: True Stories of Love...

If love incarnate was sitting beside you today, what would they say to you? Today we offer you a little practice that we learned from the one-and-only Elizabeth Gilbert – Letters from Love . We share a tiny how-to and then dive into reading some of our own letters, Caitlin as a seasoned veteran and Rebekah as a fresh newbie. You're invited to write your own letter, too, but even if you don&#39...

Today on Scratch That we bring you the disabled bromance of your dreams – Danny Kurtzman and Steve Way . You might know Steve from his role on the Hulu series Ramy , and maybe you recognize Danny from his modeling days, but most recently, these two have been in creative collaboration as the leading man (Danny) and executive producer (Steve) of the recent (gorgeous) film Good Bad Things . These two...

Do you ever feel frozen by the chaos, the mess, the to-do list? There's a big project you really want to dive into, but every time you try to start, you end up scrolling on your phone instead? Or you look out at the suffering in the great wide world and don't know what steps you could possibly take to help? This week, Caitlin introduces us to a sturdy framework their brilliant little brain...