Rethinking Communication

It's not in our nature to listen first. So much attention is paid to speaking that we often forget that for it to be effective, someone else has to be listening.   Here in the United States, we take public speaking classes in school and speech is a protected right under the Constitutional, but no such attention is paid to listening.   My guest this week, Graham Bodie, is a professor and researcher...

For 25 years, Jeff Schoep led the largest neo-Nazi organization in the United States — the National Socialist Movement. For more than two decades, Jeff spread propaganda, hatred, and fear, and his extremist views caused pain, anguish, and suffering for many.   But just a few years ago, Jeff left that world behind. But what's more, Jeff didn't just leave, he started an organization, Beyond Barriers...

What happens when an ultimatum doesn't work, and instead of bringing people into alignment with your cause, it pushes them into the very thing you're trying to prevent or discourage?   In the aftermath of the Sept. 11, 2001, terrorist attacks on the United States, President George W. Bush famously stated "Either you are with us, or you are with the terrorists," effectively launching the 20-year Wa...

This week, I'm going solo to dive a bit deeper into a topic we care about A LOT — our opinions.   I make the case for why you don't have to have an opinion about everything, and in fact, you probably shouldn't. In our rush to be right — or, at least, appear to be right — we create snap judgments without first giving ourselves the space for critical thinking.   And if you're a fan of the Olympics l...

If you believe the 24-hour news cycle or the pundits pontificating on social media, we are as polarized politically as we can possibly be and every issue leads to gridlock.   My guest this week, Layla Zaidane, believes differently, and she has good reason to. In her role as the President and CEO of the non-profit Millennial Action Project, Layla is a part of making bipartisan cooperation happen ac...

These days, we exist in a state of constant stimulation. More than ever, we need moments that center our attention on the experience at hand, and our thoughts, and our emotions.   That's the view of my guest this week, author Rebecca Pacheco. In her new book, Still Life: The Myths and Magic of Mindful Living , Rebecca writes, "Our attention is not infinite, and only we can control how to spend thi...

Matthew Barzun is the former U.S ambassador to Sweden and the United Kingdom, and in his new book, The Power of Giving Away Power , Matthew lays out a shift in how to think about power and leadership.   In so many areas of our lives, power is seen as a pyramid, where the people at the top make the decisions, create the ideas, and determine the course of action. Matthew makes the case for the const...

On a hike in Joshua Tree National Forest in 2018, Claire Nelson mistakenly veered far from the trail and fell 25 feet after an unfortunate misstep — a fall that shattered her pelvis and left her immobile.   For four days, Claire lay alone in the sweltering heat of the California desert, reflecting on her life, her fears, and the things she had held most dear.   Claire survived, she's recently rele...

This week I welcome Heino Falcke, an award-winning astrophysicist who helped lead the team of astronomers that captured the first-ever image of a black hole.   His new book, Light in the Darkness: Black Holes, the Universe, and Us, is a fascinating recount of how people from all over the world came together to peer into the depths of space in a way that had never been done before.   Two things can...

My guest this week is hip hop artist and poet Jason "Propaganda" Petty. He's got a new book out called, Terraform: Building a Better World. And after reading it and digging more into Prop's work, I haven't been able to look at my morning cup of coffee the same.   This conversation with Prop went to some deep places. He's an intensely observational man … not much gets past him. And it flows into th...

From a young age, Rasheed Ogunlaru was concerned about matters of the heart — about showing up in all situations as he truly was and not just who he felt he needed to be.   Now, as a speaker, coach, author, and singer-songwriter, Rasheed has dedicated his life to helping others navigate the tug between accepting their true selves and managing personal growth.   This week, Rasheed and I discuss wha...

My guest this week, Dr. Peter Coleman, is a professor of psychology and education at Columbia University, where among other things, he directs the Difficult Conversations Lab. He's written several books on the topic of conflict, and his latest work is the focus of our conversation this week here on the show.   Peter's new book is called The Way Out, How to Overcome Toxic Polarization.   Dr. Colema...

This week, I welcome Nisha Anand to the show. I first came to know about Nisha when I found her Ted Talk titled, The Radical Act of Choosing Common Ground.   Sounds right up my alley, doesn't it?   A long-time activist and the CEO of a non-profit called The Dream Corps, Nisha has been involved in such work as helping garner bipartisan support for criminal justice reform that was eventually signed...

The ingredients of a happy and thriving career include being seen as a valuable employee and having our work be seen for its value.   My guest today, Karen Wright, an executive coach and author, has been there and understands this desire. And as you'll hear, Karen found out years ago that to be happy and fulfilled in her job, she needed to be seen and known, even if it meant letting go of some pre...

My guest this week is Matis Miller, a licensed clinical social worker, a certified cognitive and dialectical behavior therapist, father of 6 children, and author of the book "The Uncontrollable Child."   Any parent can tell you that we have a lot of ideas about what a child should or shouldn't do, or how they should or shouldn't act and behave. And this is the root source of so much of the kind of...

This week's guest and I have a mutual disdain for the phrase "time heals all wounds."   In her new book, I Am Here , Ashley LeMieux writes about how untrue "time heals all wounds" is as she recounts the many deep scars she holds and how she has taken an active part in moving past them.   We all have wounds that affect how we show up in the world today, but our shared pain and trauma can help us be...

My guest this week is Jeffrey Shaw, author of the book, The Self-Employed Life.   Jeffrey has never had a traditional job. He's always worked for himself, starting as a kid when he'd sell eggs door to door.   Entrepreneurs and the self-employed are masters at using the words of the doubting as gasoline on the embers of the idea that drives them, and Jeffrey is no different. But as Jeffrey knows, i...

In Part 2 of a look at the modern state of policing the United States, I welcome Anthony Shefferly, an active duty police officer.   I cannot imagine what the last year has been like for the men and women in law enforcement. As you'll hear from Anthony, it's been stressful, anxiety ridden, and at times, angering.   Conversations like this one with Anthony must happen more often. We must ask questi...

My guest this week is Nick Laparra, the host of the Let's Give a Damn podcast.   Nick envisions a world where there are fewer walls, longer bridges, and bigger tables, and as you'll hear, a churning curiosity within his soul drives this mission, even when — as he admits — it goes into some unhealthy places.   Nick and I discuss what it means to live an others-focused life, and we spend quite a bit...

Annie Auerbach is the co-founder of a branding agency based in London and author of the book Flex: Reinventing Work for a Smarter, Happier Life.   In her book and in this conversation, Annie makes the case that modern life is zapping us of our creativity — that rigidity in our jobs, our lives, our choices is consuming us, and we don't have the bandwidth to be creative.   Add in the COVID-19 pandem...

My guest this week, Brian David Johnson, is a futurist. A technological futurist, to be more precise. He's made a career out of creating a vision for a future state — for people, for companies — and then helping them build a path to get there.   He was the first futurist — yes, that was actually his job title — at Intel, and he's currently a professor at Arizona State University's Global Futures L...

Leslie Ehm is on a mission to help you unleash your inner Swagger.   For years, Leslie has consulted with and coached executives at some of the world's biggest brands. And yet, she has found a lack of swagger — true Swagger — at nearly every turn.   But Leslie's definition of Swagger might be different than yours. It certainly was for me. But she has now written a book, Swagger: Unleash everything...

Carla Johnson is a storyteller trying to get companies and businesses to see that they, too, are storytellers. At least, the good ones are.   And while Carla primarily works with executives and marketers as they rethink and fine-tune their approach to potential customers, so much of the work she does has direct carrry-over into our everyday relationships.   Carla, who is the author of the book Re:...

Denise Woods is the "voice behind the voice" for some of the biggest names in acting, from Will Smith to Halle Berry to Idris Elba to Jessica Chastain.   As an internationally renowned vocal coach, Denise has dedicated her life to helping others find their true, authentic voice, not just in terms of how her subjects sound, but how they communicate their story through their voice.   In this convers...

Dr. Robyne Hanley-Dafoe is an award-winning education and psychology instructor and resiliency expert and the author of the book, Calm Within the Storm: A Pathyway to Everyday Resiliency.   Where most of us view resiliency as a battle and a fight that we just have to "toughen out," Robyne approaches the topic from a place of trust, kindness, self-alignment, and balance.   Her belief that "I can do...