Reimagining Love with Dr. Alexandra Solomon

Throughout her decades as a therapist, Dr. Alexandra has helped many people navigate being "the affair partner." Participating in infidelity creates an intoxicating yet profoundly confusing blend of emotions and experiences. In this episode, Dr. Alexandra examines the psychology of this role and offers a compassionate look into the surrounding context: the thrills, secret benefits, sources of sham...

In this solo episode, Dr. Alexandra confronts a common roadblock to repair: shame. Often, in the wake of relational harm, feelings of shame secretly run the show, causing you to get combative and defensive or freeze, flee, or fawn in essential moments. Dr. Alexandra provides strategies for moving from shame into action—so that you can make yourself available for repair—and gives tangible tips for...

Ten years after "conscious uncoupling" first entered the public lexicon, Katherine Woodward Thomas joins Reimagining Love to discuss her powerful rebrand of what's possible after a breakup or divorce. Through sharing her story and dissecting the cultural myths that cause us to view divorce as a failure, Katherine encourages us to bring a sense of generosity and intentionality to the process so tha...

Esther Boykin joins Dr. Alexandra for an expansive conversation around the intersection of mental health and our careers. Esther highlights the difference between self-care and self-compassion, and points us towards using self-compassion as an essential tool for improving both our personal and work lives. When we bring self-compassion to our careers, we prevent burnout by opening up a deeper conne...

What does it feel like to be in a securely attached relationship? Renowned relationship expert and therapist Julie Menanno joins Reimagining Love to illuminate what we can learn from examining secure attachments. Together with Dr. Alexandra, Julie helps anxious and avoidant partners understand each other by guiding us through how different attachment styles show up in tender moments. Ultimately, J...

Deceit, infidelity, and betrayal profoundly shake our inner worlds. If you're struggling to heal from relational harm, you may be endlessly ruminating on the past and wondering why you can't just let it go. In this episode, Dr. Alexandra breaks down the process of forgiveness and provides seven reasons why you can’t get over it.  Relevant links: Access this episode's companion worksheet here: http...

What are trauma bonds and how can we heal from them? Dr. Laura Copley joins the podcast to dive into the sticky dynamics of unhealthy, trauma-bonded relationships. Drawing from personal experiences and her work as a relationship trauma expert, Dr. Laura gives us insight into what she calls "the hero's journey" — a transformative path towards recognizing our origin stories, attachment wounds, and c...

Dr. Sara Nasserzadeh returns to Reimagining Love to share her research on the six ingredients that help love bloom into a thriving relationship. In this conversation, Dr. Sara encourages us to move beyond our culture's myth of finding a perfect mate and instead, focus on creating something special together.  Relevant links:  Love by Design: 6 Ingredients to Build a Lifetime of Love by Dr. Sara Nas...

Thinking about re-entering the dating scene after a breakup or loss? How can you tell if you're truly ready to get back out there? In this solo episode, Dr. Alexandra provides five Relational Self-Awareness-informed indicators that you can use to help you discern whether you’re ready to date again. Relevant links: Access this episode's companion worksheet here: https://www.dralexandrasolomon.com/w...

In this in-depth solo episode, Dr. Alexandra explains the six common roles we played in our original family systems. Way before we ever were involved in a romantic relationship, we were part of a family system, and that system, for better or for worse, shaped our ideas about who we can and cannot be. Through understanding our past, we can see how these roles continue to show up in our relationship...

Emily Nagoski joins Reimagining Love for a vulnerable and expansive conversation about nurturing lasting sexual connections in long-term partnerships. As an award-winning sex educator and author, Emily combines groundbreaking research, sex education, and stress education to expand our ideas about women's sexuality. In her new book, Come Together , Emily explores how long-term couples maintain sexu...

Renowned divorce coach Kate Anthony sits down with Dr. Alexandra to offer us an empowering approach to divorce that centers accountability and integrity. Sharing wisdom from her own divorce, Kate guides Dr. Alexandra through the experience, from exploring what is embedded within the question ‘should I stay or should I go?’ to all the tricky things that emerge in the aftermath of a separation: pare...

Therapist and sexologist Nicoletta Heidegger joins Reimagining Love for an expansive conversation about all things sexuality. Nicoletta's approach shows the power of sex-positivity — encouraging curiosity about how everyone can learn to have better sex and, in doing so, build deeper connections to our senses, our relationships, and ourselves. Relevant links: Learn more about Nicoletta's work: http...

Dr. Mariel Buqué joins Reimagining Love to discuss her debut book, Break the Cycle: A Guide to Healing Intergenerational Trauma. As an expert in intergenerational trauma, Dr. Buqué offers wisdom on what gets passed down within families: not only inheritances of pain and trauma but also precious stories and gifts. Dr. Buqué shares her journey of infusing traditional clinical frameworks with holisti...

In this special mini-solo episode, Dr. Alexandra invites you to join her as she reflects on 2023 and moves into the new year with intentionality. Sharing her perspective on resolutions, Dr. Alexandra encourages listeners to navigate this time with self-compassion and gentleness. Then, Dr. Alexandra guides listeners through two exercises designed to reflect on the lessons and challenges of the past...

Whether it's smoking, indulging in less-than-ideal meals, or not hitting the gym as often as we'd desire, it's easy to take our partner's unhealthy habits personally. If you struggle to cope with a partner's habit, Dr. Alexandra is here to help. In the second episode of this two-part series, Dr. Alexandra introduces the idea of a 'Health Habit Discrepancy' and encourages you to get curious about w...

Whether it's smoking, indulging in less-than-ideal meals, or not hitting the gym as often as we'd desire, it's easy to take our partner's unhealthy habits personally. If you struggle to cope with a partner's habit, Dr. Alexandra is here to help. In the first episode of this two-part series, Dr. Alexandra examines what might be lying beneath your concerns and offers strategies for you to explore. A...

Today’s solo episode is geared towards the “newly single,” whether you just got out of a brief situationship or a long-term, serious partnership. Dr. Alexandra breaks down what research tells us about why breakups are so challenging, and then delivers five practical strategies to help you feel more like you in this new era. Order Dr. Alexandra's new book, Love Every Day https://bookshop.org/p/book...

Minaa B. joins Dr. Alexandra to discuss healing from trauma and the power of connecting self-care to community care. As a licensed social worker and mental health educator, Minaa's work explores the intersection of mental health and social justice, and uses this understanding to give context to our personal struggles, from our childhoods to the systems of oppression that deeply impact our communit...

Julie Krafchick and Yue Xu, hosts of the popular podcast Dateable , join Dr. Alexandra for a fun, yet insightful, conversation about all things dating. Together, they explore our rapidly changing dating culture and tackle three sticky relationship situations. Relevant links: Listen to the episode of Dateable where Dr. Alexandra joined Julie and Yue to discuss pace discrepancies: https://pod.link/1...

Today's show is the 100th episode of Reimagining Love! Dr. Alexandra celebrates this milestone by answering several great listener questions: one from a woman in her 20s who is grappling with stability vs adventure in her love life; one about ambition differences between two partners; and one from a man desiring more affection from his partner. Take a listen to hear from Dr. Alexandra on all of th...

Dr. Alexandra is joined by therapist and author Julia Samuel for a wide-spanning conversation about family systems, intergenerational healing, grief, and money. Order Dr. Alexandra's new book, Love Every Day: https://bookshop.org/p/books/love-every-day-365-relational-self-awareness-practices-to-help-your-relationship-heal-grow-and-thrive-alexandra-solomon/19970421?ean=9781683736530 Every Family Ha...

Dr. Devorah Heitner, an author and digital wellness expert, joins Dr. Alexandra for a conversation about parenting, technology, and the internet. As our world become more and more complex for kids of all ages, Dr. Heitner empowers parents to have conversations with their kids at all ages and stages, model healthy tech usage, and more. Order Dr. Alexandra's new book, Love Every Day: https://booksho...

If you and your partner have a desire difference between you, you're not alone. In this episode, Dr. Alexandra is joined by guests Dr. Lauren Fogel Mersy and Dr. Jennifer Vencill for an honest and compassionate conversation about mismatched libidos and how partners can navigate this challenge as a team. Order Dr. Alexandra's new book, Love Every Day: https://bookshop.org/p/books/love-every-day-365...

Dr. Alexandra is joined by Dr. Tracy Dalgleish for a rich discussion about both of their new books, as well as the growth potential for couples when they engage in therapy and Relational Self-awareness. Order Dr. Tracy's new book, I Didn't Sign Up For This: https://bookshop.org/p/books/i-didn-t-sign-up-for-this-a-couples-therapist-shares-real-life-stories-of-breaking-patterns-and-finding-joy-in-re...