Reimagining Love with Dr. Alexandra Solomon

Have you ever felt like different parts of yourself were competing for attention and power? Maybe you have aspects of your personality that you’re proud of, and others that you’d rather keep hidden from the world—the ones that tend to rear their heads in your not-so-shining moments. According to Internal Family Systems Therapy, a framework developed by today’s guest, Dr. Richard Schwartz, we are a...

What would your reaction be if someone asked if you’re codependent? If “Certainly not!” is your immediate response, this episode invites you to look a little deeper. While we often turn to a single definition of codependency—enabling another person in a situation that is damaging or dangerous, such as addiction—Terri Cole‘s new book, Too Much: A Guide to Breaking the Cycle of High-Functioning Code...

The decision to cut off a family member is a difficult one. Estrangement is an attempt to solve a painful, systemic relationship problem. This monumental move should be deeply considered, and my collectivist approach to therapy encourages being curious about and striving to understand how the different contexts our family members—epsecially those with a generational divide—grew up and live within...

In North America, we’re conditioned from an early age to cultivate specific components of our full personalities and curtail others. For people socialized as girls, traditionally “feminine” qualities such as softspokenness and emotional exploration are encouraged, while assertiveness is discouraged. For people socialized as boys, qualities like toughness and a stiff upper lip are considered mascul...

Founder and CEO of YourTango, Andrea Miller, joins Dr. Share to share the power of being a lifelong “seeker” of relational wisdom. Andrea has dedicated her life to connecting her audience with relationship experts and celebrating relational wisdom, and today, invites us into her journey of opening herself up to love’s lessons. Relevant links: Learn more about YourTango: https://www.yourtango.com/...

Loss and grief are universal and profoundly human. The death of a loved one, the end of a relationship, a trauma that drastically shifts the trajectory of a life—each spurs a unique grieving process that can be difficult to navigate for both the people grieving and their support systems. As a chaplain at a Level One Trauma Center in Florida, J.S. Park provides emotional and spiritual care for and...

What happens when we listen and are listened to more fully, forging a deeper connection? Decades of research tell us that the brain undergoes physiological changes when we begin to “talk without criticizing, listen without judgment, and connect beyond difference.” This is the definition of dialogue coined by today’s guests, Dr. Helen LaKelly Hunt and Dr. Harville Hendrix.  Doctors Hunt and Hendrix...

In this two-part series, Dr. Alexandra shares ten essential skills for couples struggling with routine conflict in their relationship. Offering strategies from her couples therapy practice, Dr. Alexandra provides new language and ways of thinking about arguments that promote empathy and care, shifting couples into a "we" perspective so that they can move through hard times as a team. Relevant link...

In this two-part series, Dr. Alexandra shares ten essential skills for couples struggling with routine conflict in their relationship. Offering strategies from her couples therapy practice, Dr. Alexandra provides new language and ways of thinking about arguments that promote empathy and care, shifting couples into a "we" perspective so that they can move through hard times as a team. Relevant link...

Family therapy expert Dafna Lender and Dr. Alexandra explore the complexities of the parent-child relationship. With 25 years of experience, Dafna has a deep understanding of how a child’s difficult behaviors and a parent’s reactivity can clash and land a family into a therapist’s office. Dafna explains how to disrupt this cycle by removing blame, exploring the parent’s attachment history, and bri...

When it comes to life stages, “midlife” often gets the short end of the stick. We speak about adolescence and retirement as vistas rich with opportunity and possibility while we joke about midlife and its related crises. However, when we adopt an affectionate perspective, opportunity and joy prove to be just as possible in this “messy middle” stage.  Many transitions take place over the decades fo...

Research shows that gender socialization plays out most rigidly in our intimate relationships. How do we learn to separate our thoughts and actions from our socialization? In this episode, podcaster, author, and feminist coach Kara Loewentheil joins Dr. Alexandra for an expansive conversation that confronts the ways in which patriarchy influences our thoughts, beliefs, and actions. Relevant links:...

In the second part of the "Should I Stay or Should I Go?" series, Dr. Alexandra continues the conversation about Relational Ambivalence and offers listeners eight things they can do to help them move from stuckness to clarity. Relevant links: Listen to Part One of this series: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/relational-ambivalence-should-i-stay-or-should-i-go/id1588419386?i=1000660888558 Get...

On today's episode, Dr. Alexandra explores the complicated question that many of us have faced at some point in our lives: Should I stay in this relationship, or should I leave? If you're unsure of what the wisest path forward is, and you're hoping to proceed with compassion for your partner and yourself, this episode is for you. Relevant links: Get the Relational Ambivalence worksheet: https://ww...

June 24th marks the two-year anniversary of The Supreme Court’s decision to overturn Roe v. Wade. Because Reimagining Love is a show devoted to relationships and helping people cultivate relationships founded in empowerment and care, Dr. Alexandra wanted to shine a light on the pervasive and pernicious impacts of the Supreme Court’s decision on individuals, couples, and families in the United Stat...

Dr. Ish Major joins Reimagining Love for a frank and honest conversation about modern masculinity and the communication gap across genders. Together, they discuss what is often missing from communication in relationships, what masculinity means in our modern era, and how truth is the antidote to toxic masculinity. Relevant links: Connect with Dr. Ish on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr_ish_...

Dr. Frank Anderson is a world-renowned trauma expert and author who has dedicated his career to teaching therapists how to help patients work through trauma. Now, in his immensely personal memoir, To Be Loved, Dr. Frank shares his own story of overcoming trauma. In this conversation, Dr. Frank weaves his clinical knowledge with personal experiences to shine a light on how when we unburden ourselve...

Long-distance relationships are no walk in the park, but that doesn't mean they can't thrive. In this episode, Dr. Alexandra tackles this topic, sharing tools and tips for couples. If you and your partner live in different time zones, are pros at FaceTime dates, and are constantly asking, "when's our next visit?", this episode is for you. Relevant links: Access the Long-Distance Relationships work...

What happens in a marriage when one partner likes to save money and one likes to spend it? According to Dr. Scott Rick’s research, when it comes to money, opposites do attract. Dr. Rick joins Dr. Alexandra to explain how our psychology shapes how we handle money and how the choices we make around money impact our relationships. Relevant links: Tightwads and Spendthrifts: Navigating the Money Minef...

Celebrity dating coach Damona Hoffman stops by Reimagining Love to deliver sage and practical advice for daters. With decades of experience in online dating, Damona gives Dr. Alexandra an update on the current state of the apps and explains why so many daters are feeling burnt out. Instead of looking for red flags and buying into tired dating myths, Damona believes the key is getting specific abou...

[Content warning: this episode contains a brief mention of suicide. If you prefer to not listen to this moment, please skip this week's listener question segment at the end of the episode] Nedra Tawwab returns to Reimagining Love to discuss what can be our most challenging and vulnerable relationships: difficult relationships with our Families of Origin. Nedra offers empowering tools and relationa...

In this solo episode, Dr. Alexandra examines a central tension in all relationships: the need for space versus togetherness. If you often find yourself wanting more connection, are you needy? If you typically need more space, are you avoidant? Here, Dr. Alexandra encourages us to ditch the labels and pathology, and instead acknowledge that both space and connection are fundamental needs in an inti...

Author Molly Roden Winter joins Reimagining Love to share her story of opening up her marriage as a happily married mother and the hard-earned and profound truths she learned along the way. For Molly, her journey of non-monogamy opened her up to more: more choice and self-discovery, and feeling more than her roles as a mother and wife.  Relevant links: More: A Memoir of Open Marriage by Molly Rode...

What would change if, instead of prioritizing romantic relationships, we made friendships the center of our lives? NPR's Rhaina Cohen joins Reimagining Love to explore the possibilities embedded within that question. In her new book, Rhaina invites us into the worlds of people who've organized their lives around deep friendship and, in doing so, challenge our ideas and assumptions about which rela...

Mark Groves and Kylie McBeath join Reimagining Love to share the story of their relationship—the story that inspired their new book, Liberated Love: Release Codependent Patterns and Create the Love You Desire. In this conversation, they get vulnerable about how they moved from breaking up to fostering breakthroughs; a journey they nurtured through what they call 'a sacred pause.' In the sacred pau...