RecoverU | Betrayal Trauma, Betrayal Recovery, Porn Addiction Recovery, Relationships, Infidelity

Have you been wounded by your pastor or church after you went to share your story of discovery? Has someone said something insensitive to you and your gut told you "this isn't right" but you felt conflicted because it came from someone inside the church? In today's episode, Kylene walks you through several truths that most churches won't tell you when you walk into their office and ask for support...

Do Kylene and Patrick have the perfect relationship? Are couples in recovery always happy? In today's episode Kylene and Patrick open up to share some of the struggles they still have as they continue to navigate the day to day reality of recovery after betrayal. While sharing personal stories and examples, they also share the self reflection, the frustration of putting in so much work only to hit...

What the heck is human design and how can it possibly relate to recovery? Human Design is a tool to help you understand yourself and those around you better. In this episode Megan specifically shares how understanding your human design and that of your partner can help you communicate more effectively! To connect with Megan please follow her on IG @itsMeganBarrett If you would like to watch her fr...

Is it possible to love my spouse after betrayal? Can we have a marriage that is happy and healthy again after sex/porn addiction and all the pain he's put me through? In this episode, Kylene shares the deep pain she experienced when she felt the spiritual disconnection form Patrick after betrayal and her personal journey with the question is falling in love again possible after you go through all...

What role does my faith play in my recovery journey? Can depending on my faith as the only resource actually hinder my long term recovery? In today's episode, Kylene and Patrick discuss the concept of spiritual bypassing which is the idea that someone uses spirituality and faith to bypass deeper work required for transformative healing. As Christians, Kylene and Patrick believe that God often uses...

Do you ever feel like you can't seem to communicate your thoughts effectively to your spouse? Or maybe, you think you communicate well, but feel frustrated that they can't seem to understand you or hear what you're saying? Communication is one of the primary struggles that married couples have. This disconnect can be amplified tremendously after betrayal when pain and emotions are high. Today's ep...

Do you ever feel like you can't seem to communicate your thoughts effectively to your spouse? Or maybe, you think you communicate well, but feel frustrated that they can't seem to understand you or hear what you're saying? Communication is one of the primary struggles that married couples have. This disconnect can be amplified tremendously after betrayal when pain and emotions are high. Today's ep...

Every betrayed partner and every addict is filled with questions at the beginning of their recovery. In todays episode, Kylene and Patrick answer the following questions: From the betrayed: How can my husband do this to me? How can I trust again? How do I know if I should leave or stay? How do I deal with trauma brain, brain fog, and emotional triggers?   From the addict: Why does it take the addi...

Is conflict healthy? How canI communicate my emotions without crossing a line? Recovery for both the addict and the betrayed partner is filled with uncomfortable, big and potentially overwhelming emotions.   In today's episode, Patrick and Kylene share about parts work, a coaching and therapeutic modality that helps us communicate safely with our emotions. In this episode they discuss how you are...

Who are the people behind the podcast mics? Today's episode is a little get-to-know-you of our podcast hosts Kylene and Patrick Terhune. Kylene shares how OCD and ADD impact her brain and her life and how some of the coaching training she received really helped her own personal healing.   If you are a betrayed partner and would like to connect with Kylene for 1:1 coaching support, please click thi...

Should I tell my kids what's going on after I discovered my husband is a sex/porn addict? This is one of the most common questions parents have after discovery/disclosure.   In today's episode, Kylene and Patrick share their personal stories and perspective on how to navigate sharing (in appropriate ways) information to help your children process the reality of what is happening in their home.   G...

Feeling stuck on your recovery journey? Maybe you feel like the resources you've been using haven't helped you fully heal and recover as a betrayed partner? In today's episode, Kylene interviews Megan Blacksmith - one of her coaches and mentors and one of the women who helped train her in the coaching modalities that catapulted her own healing and dramatically influenced how she works today as a b...

As a betrayed partner working through reconciliation, are you feeling exhausted, stressed and discouraged?   In today's episode Kylene pulls back the curtain to share the realities of working as a coach, sharing hope with others, while simultaneously navigating the ups and downs of her own recovery.   If you are a betrayed partner and would like to connect with Kylene for 1:1 coaching support, ple...

Are you a betrayed partner who has discovered your husband is a sex or porn addict? Do you feel alone, frustrated and overwhelmed? In today's episode, Kylene interviews Lisa Limehouse, a fellow betrayer partner and betrayal recovery coach. She shared her personal story, words of wisdom, as well as connecting her life experiences and recovery to the deep faith she holds.  We know that you will rela...

In this episode, Kylene and Patrick discuss what boundaries are, how to set them effectively, and they offer specific examples for you to consider on your own journey of recovery from betrayal trauma.    *Special NOTE* A good friend and dedicated listener brought to my attention that we did not mention a VERY important caveat!! For anyone in a relationship where they need to protect their future o...

Is relapse a choice? This is a controversial stance, one that Kylene believes once 90 days of sobriety has been successfully navigated and the addiction recovery is engaged in healing tools and resources. Kylene wants you to feel like you have complete control over your mind and behaviors and she believes that choosing empowering identity thoughts (as long as they are combined with helpful resourc...

Today's episode is a mini episode designed to accompany episode 12 - making empowered choices. This is a meditation that Kylene has designed to assist you in connecting to the identity and version of yourself you would like to be so you can have more clarity on your path to recovery.   This meditation can be used for both the addicted partner and the betrayed partner to assist in their individual...

Feeling STUCK in your recovery? In today's episode, Kylene and Patrick share how: 1) Lack of education and resources 2) An inability to create or to get to safety 3) Being afraid of facing pain 4) Spiritual bypassing or denial are some of the most common healing pitfalls we can fall into if we aren't aware of them and consciously choose the discomfort of healing to keep us moving forward!    If yo...

How do we navigate sex after discovering my husband is a sex/porn addict? Is it ok? Do we abstain? What's this about 90 days of celibacy and how can that help? In today's episode, Kylene and Patrick break down the idea of 90 days of celibacy after discovering sex/porn addiction in your relationship.  They discuss how this is beneficial for the addict, how it can be beneficial for the betrayed part...

Are you a couple working through reconciliation, an addict navigating withdrawal and recovery, or a betrayed partner struggling with intense emotions and trauma? In this episode Kylene an Patrick go deeper than the basic recommendations that you connect with 1:1 coaching/therapy and group support and dive into some practical lifestyle and supplemental supports that might seem out of the box, but c...

Are you a couple working through reconciliation, an addict navigating withdrawal and recovery, or a betrayed partner struggling with intense emotions and trauma? In this episode Kylene an Patrick go deeper than the basic recommendations that you connect with 1:1 coaching/therapy and group support and dive into some practical lifestyle and supplemental supports that might seem out of the box, but c...

What if you could CHOOSE your identity and then step into and embody that moving forward? In this episode, Kylene and Patrick discuss the important of choosing identify through recovery. They disagree with the long term use of statements like "I am an addict" and discuss how that communicates a negative identity to your subconscious and why using statements like "I am someone recovery form sex add...

Shame is a primary driver of addictive patterns and healing from shame is one of the key components of true recovery. If you are a recovering sex/porn addict, or if you are a betrayed partner who wants to understand your addict spouse more deeply, this episode is for you.   Kylene and Patrick share both of their perspectives on how shame plays a roll in behavior and identify and different ways to...

Are you a couple going through full therapeutic disclosure after betrayal trauma and sex/porn addiction?  The impact and empathy letters are an important part of the disclosure process and in today's episode, Kylene and Patrick share why those letters are so important, what they include, and how they impact your recovery in a positive way! If you are a betrayed partner and would like to connect wi...

Are you a sex/porn addict looking for healing resources? In today's episode, Patrick breaks down the Conquer group - a support group that provided hope and healing for him shortly after discovery. The Conquer group combines therapeutic modalities along with a faith based perspective on healing from unwanted sexual behaviors. It provides education around addiction and how the brain works, as well a...