Rebuilding Us: Marriage Podcast

It's a topic that every married couple deals with sooner or later—conflict. If you’re married, you know that conflict comes with the territory. But there is a way to deal with it better and faster. Sometimes it shows up in the middle of family vacations, like on our recent trip to Tokyo and Guam. Sean and I found ourselves in the midst of a classic “silent treatment” scenar...

Sharing your feelings can be vulnerable, especially if there is already conflict in your relationship. Too often, people choose to stuff their feelings, pretending all is well just to avoid conflict. The problem with that is that conflict doesn't usually just go away. It must be addressed. Originally aired in December, 2023, today's episode is one for the ages. I'm sharing four tips on how to hone...

Marriage is a blessing...until it's not. Good marriages can be like heaven on earth, but bad marriages are like h, e, double hockey sticks. Whether your marriage is wonderful or wearisome, chances are you may be prioritizing it too much. How do you know if your marriage has become an idol in your life? That's what we're discussing in today's sweet repeat episode (originally aired on August 6, 2024...

Are you disappointed by someone you love? Maybe your spouse let you down, a friend broke your trust, or a relationship didn't turn out the way you hoped. The truth is, every one of us has experienced the pain of unmet expectations. In this replay episode, we're revisiting a foundational conversation about hope, because the message is just as important today as when it first aired. Disappointment h...

I want you to have the clarity, consistency, and cooperation you need to avoid confusion, consequences, and chaos should you decide to do an in-home separation. Navigating an in-home separation is not an easy process, but sometimes, due to financial constraints, children with special needs, or unique life circumstances, it may be the best option. As someone who is 100% pro marriage and always root...

In this episode, I'm sharing my step-by-step plan for navigating a marriage separation with wisdom and clarity. Separation is never something we hope for, but sometimes it can feel like the last exit before divorce. I’m covering the exact conversations you need to have before separating—from setting boundaries and making living arrangements to talking about finances, kids, and even how...

It's a subject most of us would rather avoid—but sometimes, we have to face it head-on: separation in marriage. When might it be necessary, how do you do it with purpose, and why every rough patch isn't a reason to separate. You’ll hear me break down the three main reasons I believe separation could be warranted—adultery, abuse, and addiction—and I’ll also share why t...

Are you constantly tempted to go through your spouse's phone or emails? If your partner has been unfaithful—or if you’re struggling with distrust and paranoia after betrayal—this is very normal, but is it the best way to determine when to rebuild trust? A listener wrote in asking this very question as she shared her struggle after infidelity. Even after her husband’s affair...

Ever wonder why you keep having the same fights about money, the kids, or even just feeling ignored? My guest, marriage therapist and Christian wives coach Beatriz Vargas says there are five core questions behind every argument in marriage. Borrowing from renowned attachment-theory expert Sue Johnson's model, these questions can transform even the most hopeless-feeling, disconnected relationships....

Author, speaker, and multi-generational mentor Rhonda Stoppe joins the show to discuss the challenges and joys of motherhood and share some practical lessons from her latest book about imperfect moms of the Bible. We also discuss some of our own mom struggles in hopes of encouraging you on your mothering journey. If you've ever wondered, “Am I doing this mom thing right? Is just being a mom...

Have you heard of the term “unequally yoked” in relationships and marriage? So many of you have reached out asking, “Is it okay for a Christian to date or marry a non-Christian?” I’m breaking down exactly what the Bible says about being unequally yoked, and sharing real talk about how this applies to dating, marriage, and even business partnerships. I talk about why G...

Finding out your spouse has been unfaithful can feel like your entire world has just shattered. I'm speaking directly to the person who is hurting, confused, and unsure of what to do next in this “best of the best” sweet repeat episode. Whether this terrible discovery is fresh or something you’ve been quietly carrying for a while, this conversation will help you take your first s...

We're celebrating our 400th episode and tackling one of the most important topics in marriage— consistency. If you’ve ever struggled with feeling like your efforts to improve your marriage aren’t working or wondered if all those small daily actions really matter, this episode is for you. Today, I’m sharing my personal journey and my not-so-secret struggle with staying consi...

Do you often get frustrated or maybe even sad because it seems you're the only one working on your marriage? Like, your spouse is "in it," but he/she doesn't seem to take the marriage seriously. You often feel taken for granted, or you feel like you take two steps forward and twelve steps back? Today's episode is just what you need to hear. This is a sweet repeat (an oldie but goodie)... a listene...

As a marriage coach, I know firsthand how unspoken and unrealistic expectations can quietly sabotage even the strongest marriages. In this episode, I'm sharing practical strategies to help you define, communicate, and realign your expectations so you and your spouse can avoid unnecessary disappointment and disconnection. We'll talk about the five most common unrealistic expectations couples face,...

Before you get married, there are several important conversations you need to have. In this episode, I'm sharing 12 emotionally healthy questions every couple should ask before getting married. Whether you’re single, engaged, or already married and just want to build deeper intimacy with your spouse, these conversation starters will help you avoid pitfalls and create a lasting connection in...

We've all heard it said, maybe even said it ourselves—marriage is hard. It's true...marriage, like life, has its seasons. There are winters in marriage, challenging times when things feel cold and bleak. But what if we can reframe that belief? What if instead of seeing marriage as hard work, we saw it as heart work? In this episode, I break down five reasons your marriage might feel difficul...

Have you been feeling overlooked, devalued, or unseen by your spouse? Does is feel like your marriage is running on autopilot, where someone or something else always seems to take priority over you? What do you do when you feel like you’re coming in second place in your marriage, or as I call it, “playing second fiddle.”  I open up about with wisdom straight from my new book...

Understanding how to offer meaningful support and help to those you love, especially during moments of grief or difficulty, is a skill worth learning. Let's explore the core question everyone should learn to ask: “Do you need a hug? Do you need help? Or do you need to be heard?” After going through a painful time, I reflect on grief and the unique ways we process pain. Sometimes, the g...

Have you heard of 'ABC Dating'? It's a unique and fun way to keep date nights fresh by building each outing around a different letter of the alphabet. I'm joined in this episode by my friend and fellow marriage coach, Sylvia Chipman, as we share personal stories, lots of laughs, and practical advice on how couples can break free from relationship ruts, regardless of budget or time constraints. Fro...

Do you feel disconnected or emotionally distant from your spouse? You're likely growing apart or feeling apathy in your relationship and want to know how to stop the drift. Today, I'm sharing some key insights and actionable steps to help you start rebuilding connection—even when things feel hopeless or aloof. I’ll break down the major causes of apathy in marriage and relationships&mda...

Valentine’s Day is almost here, and for many people, this holiday doesn’t always feel like a celebration, especially if you’re feeling disconnected or discouraged. You are definitely not alone—and this episode is packed with practical ideas you may have never considered to help you reconnect on Valentine's Day and beyond. Here's your cheat code for making Valentine&rsq...

If you're focusing on fixing the emotional or relational problems in your marriage but haven't addressed your spiritual disconnection, your efforts won't go as far or last as long. In today's episode, we're getting to the heart of why so many couples struggle in their marriages. From my experience coaching couples, I see marriage problems like poor communication or emotional distance are often sym...

Do you sometimes struggle with how to pray for your marriage? In today’s episode, I’m breaking down the five powerful ways you can cover your marriage in prayer—and how to actually pray with confidence, intention, and results. Whether you're a seasoned prayer warrior or just starting out, you’ll leave with a super-practical template that makes praying for your spouse simple...

It's story time! Come and listen to how an ancient story about Deborah the judge can teach us to break free from traditional gender roles and society's expectations. I’m excited to share an excerpt from my brand-new book, “Tried and True: Marriage Advice from 12 Imperfect Biblical Couples,” which highlights Deborah's incredible leadership, her secure identity in God, and her husb...