Raising Godly Boys Minute

How can you help make sure your kids keep their faith in God? The following statistics are eye-opening and sobering. According to Barna, nearly 59 percent of youth leave the church after they graduate high school, and only 17 percent maintain a biblical worldview. Common reasons for leaving the church include moving to college, judgmental and/or hypocritical church members, and no longer feeling c...

Do your kids believe it is better to give than receive? Science shows that children are born with a “compassionate instinct.” They observed that infants help others even though they are too young to have learned this behavior. Their motivation doesn’t depend on the expectation of a reward. As parents and father figures, it is our job to encourage our children to be givers, not takers. Takers are s...

Maybe our son’s safety shouldn’t be our only goal. Author Leslie Leyland Fields raised her son in Alaska. One day, her son got injured in an accident, and Leslie boarded a plane with him to get help. But when she felt the pilot pull up hard and turn, she thought they were about to hit a mountain and die. At that moment, Leslie felt regret. She thought she had failed at her one goal as a mom: to gi...

Who do your children belong to? The Bible says that once they decide to follow Jesus, they become God’s children. “To all who believed him and accepted him, he gave the right to become children of God.” John 1:12 It’s amazing that God loves them so much and has named them as one of his children. Becoming a child of God comes with security. Being secure in your identity as God’s child removes your...

Dr James Dobson of Focus on the Family once received an interesting letter from a nine-year-old girl. The letter was titled “why girls are better than boys.” The list included everything from “girls are kinder to animals,” to “girls don’t smell as bad.” Amused, Dr. Dobson posted the letter in his newsletter, and asked boys to make their own list.  He received a variety of responses, including “boy...

What gives you peace? Is it listening to music, spending time outdoors, or meditating? The best source of peace is the Prince of Peace, Jesus Christ. Jesus told his disciples — and us: “I am leaving you with a gift — peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So don’t be troubled or afraid.” When our boys are worried and scared, we should point them to the Provi...

Have you had The Talk with your son? That conversation about physical differences between males and females can be awkward and uncomfortable. So awkward, in fact, that some parents postpone The Talk until a later, more convenient time. As a dad, you need to courageously begin that conversation. Today’s kids encounter sexuality at school, the mall, and even at sporting events. And because boys are...

How can you teach your son to respect women? Romans 12:10 says “Love one another with a brotherly love.” That is a far cry from the values of our culture, where disrespect is the norm. But while boys tend to have a natural respect for older men, they may need help learning how to treat women appropriately. First, lead by example. If you’re a man, treat the women in your life with kindness. Second,...

Raising a son is a lot like growing a garden. There’s a lot of strategy and decision making involved– where to plant your garden and what seeds to put in the ground. There’s grunt work– cultivating, planting, and building a fence. There’s waiting and watering daily, and dealing with unknowns like weather. There’s the stress of predators, and the joy of watching new growth. Even with all that work,...

When you want to open a package, you use scissors, not a jackhammer. When you want to tame your bedhead, you use a comb, not a pitchfork. Using the appropriate tool for the job is important. Similarly, when it’s necessary to correct your son, make sure to use the appropriate technique. A stern gaze might be enough warning for a sensitive boy. Another child may need extra chores or other forms of d...

Is your son “too cool” for mom’s kisses? Here’s what you can do. Rhonda Stoppe was sitting in a hospital room with her six year old son Brandon. He was getting a sleep study after having a horrible seizure. Brandon was asleep, and Rhonda walked over and kissed him on the forehead. The technician told Rhonda to go look at the screen. Rhonda was astonished to see that, even though Brandon was asleep...

Are you an idol worshiper? While most Americans don’t worship carved statues, idol worship is still prevalent in our society. We idolize things like money, possessions, and jobs … and people like actors, athletes, musicians, and even members of our own families. A biblical definition of an idol is anything or anyone we value more than God or worshiping someone or something other than God as though...

Here’s a simple parenting tip– take some time to relax with your boy.  Pediatrician Dr. Meg Meeker says that most parents don’t realize the importance of “doing nothing” with sons.  Even if you only have ten minutes, invite your son to sit down on the front porch with you with his favorite snack or drink. Don’t badger him with questions, check your phone, or start lecturing. Simply sit together. ...

Winston Churchill, British prime minister during World War II, said, “Those who fail to learn from history are doomed to repeat it.” And yet, some in our society are trying to change history, to make it conform to their political, social, and anti-Christian beliefs. Don’t let unbiblical ideology distort our American heritage. Remind your son that this great nation was founded on biblical principle...

What is TV teaching your son about masculinity? One study about male representation in TV shows studied 25 shows, over three thousand characters, and over four hundred episodes. Researchers found that, across the board, the male characters usually displayed the same negative traits– unhealthy coping mechanisms, aggression, a lack of emotion, and even a lack of care as a father. Without guidance, y...

Ever heard of the Discovery Channel’s show Dirty Jobs? As the name suggests, in the show a man named Mike Rowe tries disgusting and dangerous occupations. He tours sewers, learns from roadkill cleaners, removes chewing gum from sidewalks, and helps exterminators. You’d think such gross content wouldn’t make good television. But the show was a hit among men. Not only does Mike’s investigation of th...

Your son needs a gang. Every young man is asking the same questions– “who is with me, who is in charge, and what is our mission?” Unfortunately, those questions are very clearly answered in violent gangs, which is why so many young men are drawn to such groups. What your son needs is a group that can answer those questions in a healthy way. Sports teams with positive coaches can offer such environ...

What makes you happy? Not just a little happy, but really happy? Maybe it’s when your team wins the championship, or when you get that work promotion, or when you slice into that perfectly cooked steak. Those things are fine, but one of the greatest joys in life is seeing your son obediently follow the Lord. Third John 3:4 says, “I have no greater joy than to hear that my children walk in truth.”...

Boys need their mom and their dad. As a mom and dad play with their young son, the mom will remind him to “be careful.” The dad will toss the son into the air and encourage him to run as fast as he can. The boy will ignore his mom and hang onto his dad’s every word. But when that little boy falls and scrapes his knee, he’ll suddenly stop ignoring his mom. He’ll run to her, seeking comfort. As they...

What’s your son’s default location? Jackson, a 16 year old, was tinkering on his car in the garage when his mom brought her laptop out and set up a makeshift desk. She didn’t say much– just did her work and asked Jackson, once, what he was working on. When she left an hour later, both she and Jackson were smiling. She had keyed into a secret of parenting a teen boy– figure out his default location...

Has your son experienced the death of a loved one? Maybe a classmate who died. Or perhaps a grandparent who suddenly passed away. Dealing with death is hard for everyone. But for kids, it’s especially confusing. A common perception is that boys are tough. But the truth is, we all experience grief and heartache. It’s just that we handle it in different ways. As a dad, take time to listen to your so...

A reporter once asked John D. Rockefeller, “How much money is enough?” Rockefeller, widely considered the wealthiest American of all time and the richest person in modern history, replied, “Just a little bit more.” Sadly, Rockefeller would never have enough money to be satisfied. When it comes to our possessions, the Bible consistently calls us to be content with what God has given us. Contentment...

Do your kids have household chores? Some kids think taking out the trash or washing the dishes is cruel and unusual punishment. But it isn’t. In fact, research shows that chores actually help kids in their physical, mental, and social development. When you give your son a job and he successfully completes it, he develops self-worth and self-esteem. This leads to confidence in knowing that he can a...

Boys love toys! Some of their favorites are racecars, robots, and rockets. And (according to kids) the louder, faster, and crazier the toy, the better! As a dad, you probably don’t play with toy dinosaurs anymore, but you just might have a big-boy toy like a motorcycle or boat. It’s fine to enjoy toys. They can even be a way of connecting with your son. But don’t let toys consume your time and att...

Did you know our homes are training grounds? President John Adams said, “Public virtue cannot exist in a nation without private virtue, and public virtue is the only foundation of republics.” Our homes can be training grounds for good and godly character. More than I want my children to be famous, rich, or exceptional, I want them to be good. The apostle Peter wrote, [M]ake every effort to supplem...