Raising Godly Boys Minute

One of life’s great challenges is learning to not just go with the flow, because sometimes the flow goes in the wrong direction. We live in a day of great distraction. Because of the digital age, information flows constantly. Some say we have become the society that is looking down – always checking our phones, tablets, and devices. These tools of mass distraction can cause us to miss important th...

John Wesley, a famous 18th century preacher, said, “There is no such thing as a solitary Christian.” As parents, we want to raise our kids to love the Lord and be responsible adults. But challenges from the worldly culture around us make parenting tough. Sometimes so tough that we grow discouraged when we don’t see immediate results. When you feel this way, remember that parenting isn’t a solitary...

Do you manage your time properly? In the craziness of normal everyday life, it’s easy to lose track of time. Perhaps your son starts school at 8 am. You’ve got a work meeting at 10 a.m. Soccer practice begins at 3:15 in the afternoon. And, of course, there’s church, piano lessons, and dozens of other activities that you and your family participate in. The question is, are you punctual or persisten...

Remember this famous quote? “Ask not what your country can do for you; ask what you can do for your country,” President John F. Kennedy during his inaugural address in 1961. As Christian men trying to raise godly boys, our mantra should be, “Ask not what God can do for me; ask what I can do for God.” It’s natural for us to think about ourselves first and not what we can do for God and what we can...

Successful living involves risk-taking. Over 300 people rejected Colonel Sanders’ special recipe for Southern fried chicken before he received a “yes.” Today, because of his persistence, KFC boasts 20,000 restaurants in 125 countries. We are wise as parents to instill in our boys the value of adventurous living. When we do, we cannot control the outcome. But we can control ourselves. We can make t...

Do you break your own rules? You no doubt have rules for your son– like no texting while driving, and no procrastinating on his homework assignments. But if your son constantly sees you breaking your own rules, he will struggle to have respect for you.  Of course, your boy does need to know that parents have more authority than kids. But, to the best of your ability, demonstrate the good habits yo...

Want to make a powerful imprint on the lives of children? I believe the most powerful method the Lord gave parents to influence our children is the simple practice of family worship. In our sophisticated age, we may forget the spiritual power of opening the Bible, reading it to our families, and leading in prayer. God made it simple: pick up the Word, share it, and lead others to the throne of gra...

Is it attention deficit disorder– or dad deficit disorder? In his book Raising Boys, Steve Biddulph tells a powerful story about a dad named Don. Don’s son was diagnosed with “attention deficit disorder.” This was years ago, before ADD knowledge was so widespread, so Don misunderstood the diagnosis. He thought it meant that his son simply needed more attention. When school was out, Don started tak...

What will you leave to your children and the generations that come after you? The saying, “You’ll never see a U-Haul behind a hearse,” is a poignant reminder that you can’t take anything with you in death, but you can leave something behind by how you live. Your children are watching you and learning from you day by day. Are you leading them closer to Christ or further from him? Teach them about J...

How can we instill integrity into our children? Teach them that we always live in God’s presence.  Jesus is always in the room. As a family, read books or listen to radio theater stories of godly people like Hudson Taylor, George Mueller, Corrie ten Boom, and William Wilberforce, for example. Discuss lessons from their lives Children need to feel valued as they learn to speak truth. If parents imm...

David. Moses. Abraham. Peter. While all of these men achieved amazing things for God, they all also had shortcomings. In the same way, the great men who built this country were also flawed. There’s a trend in culture right now to dismiss their heroism, and choose instead to emphasize their shortcomings. But as Theodore Roosevelt once pointed out, [quote], “far better is it to dare mighty things…th...

How high is heaven above the earth?  The distance is immeasurable, just like God’s love for you. As the Bible says, “For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is God’s love for those who fear him.” King David paints a powerful word picture in his psalm, writing that God “has removed our sins as far from us as the east is from the west.”  If you have turned to God and trusted in his...

Digital technology has become controlling, addictive, and intrusive. Parents, it’s ok for you to be the “bad guy” about the use of electronics. Don’t let the culture squeeze you into its mold. Our children don’t need endless hours of internet and television exposure. Scientific studies show that too much digital time actually alters brain patterns. Consider not allowing “screen time” during the we...

What memories do you have with your grandfather? The power of a grandpa’s love in a young man’s life cannot be understated. Child psychologist Dr. Mary Polce-Lynch once counseled a 10-year-old boy who lived thirteen hours from his grandpa. This boy didn’t see his grandpa very often, but talked about him every single day. She asked the boy to describe what his grandpa meant to him, and the boy was...

Do any of your son’s friends have absent dads? It’s likely they do. Over 19.5 million children– or one in four– don’t live with their dad. Fatherless boys are more likely to struggle in school, have behavioral problems, and participate in risky behaviors. Take note of your son’s peers who don’t spend time with their dads. The next time you plan a father-son fishing trip, bike ride, or hike, be qui...

If you’ve ever gone backpacking in the great outdoors, you know the importance of bringing the right equipment. You pack a tent, not a tire. You pack matches, not a microwave.  Similarly, when your son heads off to school, make sure he packs the right characteristics. This includes: Honesty—to complete his own work instead of cheating off others. Respect—to see people for who they really are, no m...

Does your walk match your talk? Nobody likes “fake,” hypocritical people. As a Christian father figure and mentor, you need to live out of your faith authentically because people are constantly watching you. I heard about a man who heard that his Christian co-worker had an accident at work. After asking if he was OK, his next question was, “Did he cuss?” How you act is equally as important as what...

How can we parents create margin in our families to build unity?  Play games together. Make a collection of board games. Develop the habit of occasionally clearing the table for game night. As children get older, families can invest in games that take longer to play. Playing board games allows for lots of interaction and often leads to laughter! Read to your children. Build the expectation into yo...

How do we raise servants? Children learn how to serve others in part by watching adults serve.  Serving others includes stepping up to the plate and stepping out to meet needs. An older pastor said, “When our children were young, I pastored a small church with no other children or activities. My kids were part of starting new groups, ministries, and opportunities. None of that was handed to them....

We can learn something valuable about our sons from Peter Pan. In her book Boy Talk, child psychologist Dr. Mary Polce-Lynch makes an observation about the Lost Boys in the story of Peter Pan. These boys are seemingly living the dream. They have no parents, and no school–  just adventures all day long. But interestingly, they still long for one childhood comfort– the bedtime story. As your son gro...

How can we raise boys who love adventure? Here are a few simple ways to encourage boys to not always play it safe but develop their God-given spirit of bravery: Encourage outdoor family activities that involve a healthy level of risk.  Whitewater rafting, tubing on rivers, and waterfall hiking are a few.  Selectively allow children to oversee their own projects.  It’s messy and not “perfect,” but...

Do you remember the song “He’s Got the Whole World in His Hands”? The song’s lyrics talk about God, saying: He’s got the wind and the rain in his hands. He’s got the little, tiny baby in his hands. He’s got you and me, brother, in his hands. He’s got you and me, sister, in his hands. He’s got everybody here in his hands.  The Bible says God holds on to us with his “righteous right hand.” This imag...

Is your son able to “blend” his emotions? When going on a hike, you bring along a bar that contains a mix of protein, carbs, and healthy fats, since your body needs  different nutrients to stay healthy. In the same way, Child psychologist Dr. Mary Polce-Lynch says that healthy development in boys includes teaching them that they can feel seemingly conflicting emotions at the same time. For instanc...

What are you most afraid of? According to a 2014 Washington Post article, fear of public speaking was America's biggest phobia, with 25.3 percent of the people saying they were afraid of speaking in front of a crowd. A 2022 study listed “corrupt government officials” as Americans’ biggest fear. With the world seemingly spinning out of control, we can easily allow fear and anxiety to paralyze...

Does your son struggle in math class? Did he miss the big play on the sports field that would have won the game? Failures and fiascos will trip up your son. You wish he’d only see success, but that’s unrealistic. Even when we try our very best, disappointment and discouragement can still strike. And when it does, your son may experience frustration and exasperation. These are normal human emotions...