QueerLove Podcast

This is the time of year for reflections! Going forward into the next chapter means honoring this one that is just finishing.  In this episode, E and Li demonstrate a relationship check in that encompasses the year of 2023 and the successes, challenges, and learning experience they have experienced as a couple. How will you look back at the past year and honor it? Send us Fan Mail Sending you so m...

Breakups suck. What about polyamorous breakups? Can you go to your other partners for support? What if a partner of yours breaks up with someone you disapproved of? In this episode, E and Li talk about lessons they've drawn from past breakups, and what to do if there is no lesson to be learned. What have you learned from breakups in your sphere? Send us Fan Mail Sending you so much love! Love...

We all know that feeling when we first start seeing someone new. Butterflies and flutters, tingles, burning, the warm glow when we get a text from them. This New Relationship Energy, or NRE, is fun and useful for bonding, but sometimes it closes our eyes to red flags and potential problems. In this episode E and Li talk in depth about how to manage NRE and how to keep in touch with yourself (and a...

Breakups suck. Whether it's amicable, mutual, or messy, the grief of losing something you love can really take it out of you. Being in a polyamorous relationship adds new complications. In this episode, Elizabeth and Li talk about skills that you can bring to make breakups more healthy and manageable, including talking about what breakups can look like well before your relationship is in trou...

Some people know from an early age that they're different; that they don't fit into the "norms" surrounding them. Li is one of those people. In this episode, Li shares their experiences growing up queer: how they tried to avoid it, how they tried to hide it, and how they tried to reverse it. Did you ever resist your own development because you'd been told it was "wron...

Growing up queer has many challenges. Complicated emotions, lack of understanding, information trickling or bursting in at surprising times. In this episode, Elizabeth shares her experiences growing up queer, and what she wishes she could change or tell her younger self. What challenges did you face in your understanding of your gender and sexuality? Send us Fan Mail Sending you so much love! Love...

Everyone is a nerd about something. We are nerds about relationships. In this episode, we talk about what it means to be a relationship nerd, what that looks like for each of us, and how that integrates into the relationship we have. Are you dating a relationship nerd? Send us Fan Mail Sending you so much love! Love our show? Please rate and review! And share it with as many friends as you think w...

Are you ready for a crash course on gender? Let's go!  In this episode, Elizabeth nerds out on gender theory, and Liana shares their insight on fluidity and the journey of gender identity and expression from their own experiences. Full of heartfelt stories and advice to support you in either your own journey, or that of your loved ones. What comes up for you when you consider the complexities...

Sometime discovering your sexuality is straightforward, sometimes it's not! In this episode, we share our own stories of exploring and understanding our sexuality, and talk about the complexities of self-identifying with courage. What surprises have you learned about yourself while exploring your sexuality? Send us Fan Mail Sending you so much love! Love our show? Please rate and review! And...

Round two on this juicy topic that even we were surprised we talked so long about. In part two, we go even deeper into what we have learned about ourselves through the lens of our attraction at different points in life.  We talk about some of the struggles and challenges that arise when attraction becomes attachment and how we have navigated fluctuating levels of attraction in long term relationsh...

What do two relationship coaches look for when starting to date/get to know a new person? We had so much to say about this that we had to break up the episode. We talk about what we individually look for and are attracted to in a potential partner, as well as how that has evolved since we were younger. And don't worry, we go into it even more in part two of this topic next week, with a little...

Relationships are our jam. We have been studying and coaching on the topics of love, s3x, and relationships for years, while also navigating our personal relationships. In this episode, we both share about how being relationship coaches have helped us in our own relationships, as well as the challenges that we run into (hello imposter syndrome and other insecurities). Even if you are not a relatio...

What's your relationship to the "work"? Do you dive into personal development work with an eager spirit like a kid in a candy store? Do you feel annoyed and frustrated with it? Do you feel a mixture of it all? Even as relationship coaches who work in the space of the "work", we are not immune to the frustrations that come with the territory. In this episode, we both share...

We're going in a bit deep on this one. In this episode, we talk about past trauma showing up for you now in relationships and how your triggers will often trigger your partner(s).  This is something that we wanted to talk about broadly to just start the conversation and bring awareness to something that often goes unsaid or just gets talked around in relationships. We use an example from our...

Long distance relationships can happen under any relationship style, but this is something that is often more prevalent in polyamorous dynamics, and something that we both receive a lot of questions around. We answer a few of the most common questions we get on this topic like what are the best ways to stay connected and how to create intimacy when you can't be physically around each other. O...

On this episode, Elizabeth shares her experience of being a femme queer.  From identifying as pansexual, to coming out at 29, to her experience with passing privilege and issues with safety, this episode is a personal account. And we know that there are many people who experience similar things. There are many different intersectionalities and unique individual experiences in being a femme queer a...

What is toxic masculinity? Is that something that just straight cismen experience or does it impact anyone who presents more masc? Spoiler, toxic masculinity impacts all masculine presenting people. When society has 'supposed to's' and 'should's' for masculinity, all masculine humans suffer the consequences.  So the question really is, how does toxic masculinity impac...

Continuing on from the theme of the last two episodes, we are now talking about date nights! You've made the move, you did the ask out, and now you are creating the connected relationship that you want with the person. One of the tools we share with our clients to support them in their relationships is creating a designated date night in their relationship. The frequency of date night may var...

On last week's episode we talked about how do you 'make a move' when you like someone. So we thought it only fitting to then talk about how do you ask someone out! Especially in the queer and poly space, this can get really nuanced. But mainly, we wanted to make this episode so that even if we feel awkward or unsure, that we can still get the words out with integrity and intentional...

Ok, so, you see someone you like right? How do you get to know them? Then once you get to know them, how do you tell them you're interested in them? Here are some personally stories and also some tips on best practices on how to bridge the gap between knowing someone and dating someone. We'd love to hear from you! Tell us your moves.  Send us Fan Mail Sending you so much love! Love our s...

What are some things that you've learned about relationships? Perhaps they don't even occur to you like "this is what I learned." For most of us, our beliefs about relationships are so engrained that honestly we don't recognize them until we start our non monogamous journey and those beliefs are challenged.  Some of them might sound like:  "If they really loved me the...

Happy Prideeee! In the honor of Pride month (and also just being queer always), we are diving into the juiciness of gay panic. Ever experienced the beauty of gay panic? Learn about what this means for us and also hear about different moments inside and outside of our relationship where our brains malfunctioned in the gayest ways. Send us Fan Mail Sending you so much love! Love our show? Please rat...

Oh hello! So happy you've stumbled upon the Queer and Poly Podcast! Pour yourself some tea and get snuggled in with your honeys because this episode is a juicy one.  In the polyamorous community we often talk about agreements v rules. In this episode, Liana and I (Elizabeth) break down what are agreements, what are rules, and what are some examples in our own relationship to help guide and na...

Wow. We did not expect this episode to go the way that it did! We started with a cute idea: What is the criteria for dating us? Which turned into conversations about expectations, agreements and getting to know each other on a deeper level.  We hope that in listening to this episode, you can hear what criteria you may have for dating in polyamorous and/or queer relationships. We also hope you gain...

One of the most common questions we get as polyamorous coaches is, how do you meet people? I don't know if there is a definitive answer to that question. Like, oh yeah, all the poly people are on 12th and Broadway usually between 1pm - 6pm on Fridays. We've both met partners in different ways and this is the way we met.  Send us Fan Mail Sending you so much love! Love our show? Please ra...