Pure Desire Podcast

In this episode of the Foundations of Freedom series, Heather Kolb joins us as we dive deep into the battlefield of the mind—where true healing begins. From a neuroscience perspective, we explore how the brain processes sexual brokenness and trauma, and why understanding this is key to lasting transformation. Many people believe they’re just “wired this way,” but what if you could actually retrain...

Sobriety isn’t just about stopping a behavior—it’s about building a new way of living. In this powerful episode, Stuart Blade dives into what it truly means to establish sobriety and not just temporarily abstain. He shares practical steps for protecting your progress, limiting the damage of past behaviors, and preventing future setbacks.  For those just starting out, Stuart offers insight into the...

In this episode, Kelly Johnston, the Women’s Groups Lead at Pure Desire, shares her profound insights on the healing journey and the importance of “surrendering to the process.” We explore how trust and vulnerability play key roles in surrendering control and embracing God’s timing, despite the fear and resistance many women face.  Kelly discusses common obstacles in recovery and how to navigate t...

In this episode, we are joined by Sam Jolman. He is the author of, The Sex Talk You Never Got: Reclaiming the Heart of Masculine Sexuality , and an expert in the field of sexual health and addiction recovery. Today we’re going to dive deep into the complexities of pornography use, compulsive sexual behavior, and the path to healing. Sam shares insights into how these behaviors can become addictive...

In this powerful kickoff to our Foundations of Freedom series, we sit down with John Begeman to explore why breaking free from denial is the critical first step in the healing journey. Often masked as a form of protection, denial can quietly keep us stuck—especially in the face of sexual brokenness or betrayal trauma.  John unpacks the subtle ways people remain unaware of their pain and the emotio...

Register for the 2025 Summit Now! In today’s episode, Bob Vander Meer and Heather Kolb join us to preview the upcoming Pure Desire Summit, sharing their excitement and insights about this year’s event. With the theme "Anchored in Hope," they discuss how the Summit aims to foster connection, growth, and healing for attendees from all walks of life. We reflect on what sets the Pure Desire Summit apa...

In this insightful episode, Dr. Jake Porter shares his expertise on sex addiction and betrayal trauma through the powerful lens of the theme Anchored in Hope .  Drawing from neuroscience, attachment theory, and spiritual truth, Dr. Jake unpacks how understanding the brain's role in addiction and trauma can offer a renewed sense of hope to those feeling stuck in cycles of pain. He explores how coup...

In this episode, Dr. Adrian Hickmon, founder of Capstone Treatment Center, shares his deep insights into the transformative power of hope in recovery, particularly for those struggling with addiction and trauma. Drawing on his firsthand experience, he explores how hope anchors individuals, helping them rediscover purpose and faith amidst emotional pain.  Adrian sheds light on how people can break...

In this powerful and deeply compassionate episode, Dr. Sheri Denham Keffer joins us to explore the theme Anchored in Hope—a lifeline for those navigating the stormy waters of sexual betrayal, trauma, and addiction. With wisdom drawn from years of walking alongside individuals in pain, Dr. Sheri unpacks how rediscovering our true identity in Christ fosters self-awareness, ignites healing, and groun...

In this episode, we dive into the world of neurodivergence and its unique connection to addiction and recovery. Our guest, Jenna Riemersma, shares insights into what neurodivergence means and offers examples of behaviors that may be seen in neurodivergent individuals.  We explore the specific challenges they face when dealing with addiction and recovery, and how mental health stigma can impact the...

In this episode, we delve deep into the intersection of mental health, trauma, and unwanted sexual behavior, exploring how our past experiences shape our present struggles. Our guest, Jay Stringer, shares powerful insights into the connection between unresolved wounds and their impact on mental health, offering practical guidance on how to approach healing with curiosity instead of self-condemnati...

In this episode, we dig into the intersection of pornography use, social media, and mental health, exploring how these modern influences are shaping our perceptions of intimacy, relationships, and self-worth. We discuss how most people's journey with porn typically begins, early signs that it’s negatively affecting mental health, and how social media plays a significant role in fueling these behav...

In this episode, we explore the intersection of faith and mental health with Dr. Carol Tanksley who has dedicated their life to helping others heal from fear, anxiety, grief, and more. We’ll talk about the Church’s role in addressing mental health struggles, unpack common misconceptions Christians hold about anxiety, depression, and other mental health challenges, and discuss how believers can dis...

In this episode, we dive into the topic of biblical sexuality with Rodney Wright. We discuss his passion for addressing this often-overlooked issue and why the conversation around biblical sexuality is “dead” in many churches today. Exploring beyond the simple “sex is for marriage” approach, we discuss how we can recover a more holistic, biblical understanding of human sexuality in a modern contex...

In this episode, we dig into the often overlooked intersection of singleness and sexuality, exploring how we can resurrect a healthier, more holistic view of both. We discuss the importance of stewarding sexual desire with integrity, especially in a culture that promotes instant gratification and casual relationships.  Our guests share their personal stories of God’s redemptive work in their sexua...

Description In this raw and vulnerable episode, Mike and Megan Ramirez share their powerful journey of rediscovering hope and redemption in their marriage after hitting rock bottom. They take us back to the moment of discovery, revealing how a devastating truth almost ended it all. Through heartache, denial, and moments of deep despair, they walk us through their process of healing, the critical s...

In today’s episode, we sit down with Dr. Curt Thompson to explore the complex relationship between anxiety, trauma, and the stories we tell ourselves. We discuss how feelings of anxiety and aloneness are intertwined, how trauma affects the brain, and the powerful role of secure relationships and community in healing.  Dr. Thompson also shares practical steps for understanding and moving through an...

In this impactful episode, we sit down with Pastor Andrew Rothrock of Riverbend Church in Bend, Oregon, to explore what it means to create a church culture that actively supports sexual health and healing. Riverbend is setting a powerful example by making recovery from compulsive sexual behavior and betrayal trauma a visible and valued part of their ministry. We talk with Andrew about why their ch...

In this powerful episode, we sit down with Jasmine Marino, Founder and Director of Jasmine Grace Outreach, to discuss their life-changing work helping survivors escape sex trafficking and begin their recovery journey. From providing tailored recovery support groups to offering essential mentoring and coaching, Jasmine Grace Outreach goes above and beyond to empower individuals who have experienced...

In this eye-opening episode, we’re joined by Lisa Thompson, Vice President of the National Center on Sexual Exploitation’s Research Institute. We delve into the complex and often misunderstood connection between pornography and sexual exploitation. We explore how the consumption of porn fuels industries that profit from human trafficking and exploitation, and the psychological, relational, and soc...

In this eye-opening episode, we dig into the complexities of the adult entertainment industry, shedding light on the personal stories often hidden behind its glitzy façade. Rey Jordan, a counselor with experience working with individuals in the industry, shares her insights on the real-life struggles that lead people to seek counseling and the trauma that shapes their experiences. We discuss the p...

Today we’re celebrating episode 400 of the Pure Desire Podcast! So we did things a little differently. We talk through the most memorable episodes, the most surprising guests, and Nick’s most unique opening song. We also share a couple testimonies from listeners personally impacted by the podcast. Then, we mix things up by doing a listener’s Q&A. We answer questions about: lying during the recover...

In this episode, we tackle the challenging yet crucial topic of reintegrating sex into a marriage after betrayal. Rebecca Vander Meer and Traci Wright, two Pure Desire Clinicians, share why this is such a struggle for many couples and the common mistakes that can hinder progress. From rushing the process to overlooking emotional intimacy, we explore what couples can do to overcome these obstacles....

In this episode, we delve into the emotional journey of couples healing from betrayal. We’re joined by Matthew and Joanna Raabsmith, relationship experts and authors, who share insights from their work on the Intimacy Pyramid—a framework designed to help couples rebuild trust, connection, and intimacy after a betrayal. We explore the different stages of healing, from honesty and emotional safety t...

In this episode, we are joined by Dr. Dan Allender, renowned author and counselor, to discuss the themes of his latest book: The Deep-Rooted Marriage: Cultivating Intimacy, Healing, and Delight . Dan shares the inspiration behind writing it and offers powerful insights into strengthening marriages.  We explore key questions such as: What does it mean to truly honor your spouse? How can couples res...