Prayers and Cusswords

Executive Dysfunction Is Ruining My Life What happens when executive dysfunction starts impacting your job, your finances, your health, and your ability to keep up with life? In this raw and unfiltered episode of Prayers & Cusswords, Ashley opens up about living with multiple mental health diagnoses, ADHD, executive dysfunction, burnout, grief, and the exhausting reality of masking symptoms th...

Apparently... me. In this deeply personal birthday episode of Prayers and Cusswords, I reflect on spending my 38th birthday at my uncle's funeral just days after being hospitalized with multiple blood clots in both lungs. From grief and burnout to purpose and becoming, this episode explores the question that's been following me all year: What are you doing with the time you've been giv...

When success no longer feels safe... In this raw bonus episode of Prayers & Cusswords , I share what it feels like to navigate burnout, career uncertainty, financial stress, a missed birthday trip, and recovery from multiple pulmonary emboli—all at the same time. What started as a conversation about being "motherfucking tired" became something deeper: a realization that I've spen...

A simple question on Threads sent me spiraling back to May 2015—the day I graduated with my master's degree, less than a month after giving birth, while working full-time and building a future for myself. It was supposed to be one of the proudest moments of my life. Instead, it became the day I got engaged. For years, I thought the lesson was that I dodged a marriage. But looking back, that&#3...

What happens when you realize you've spent your entire life trying to earn something you already possess? In this deeply personal episode of Prayers & Cusswords , Ashley shares the unexpected breakthrough that emerged from a family conflict, a difficult conversation, and a question that many of us carry in silence: What do I need to do to be enough? Through stories about motherhood, entrep...

What do you do with inherited pain, addiction, grief, father wounds, heartbreak, and the parts of yourself you've spent years trying to outrun? After listening to Daniel Caesar's Son of Spergy , I found myself reflecting on sobriety, generational trauma, healing, spirituality, and the surprising truth about rock bottom. In this episode, I explore why life's biggest breakdowns may actua...

That’s what my dating life feels like now. Not love. Not connection. Not even heartbreak. Just temporary emotional access with an expiration date nobody warns you about. In this episode, I talk about: matching with the same man twice months apart realizing our kids go to the same school how quickly people disappear once connection starts feeling “too real” and why modern dating feels more psycholo...

Nobody talks enough about what happens AFTER the breakdown. After the awakening. After the reckoning. After the moment you finally realize survival mode is no longer sustainable. Because now what? In this episode, I talk about integration — the uncomfortable stage of healing where awareness must become action. The stage where you still have to navigate bills, responsibilities, strained relationshi...

I think this episode is a funeral. Not for me… but for the version of me that only knew how to survive. No intro music. No edits. No polished production. Just me realizing — in real time — that I have not fully felt HERE in a very long time. This episode ties together every spiral, every late-night rant, every contradiction, every grief-filled reflection, every moment of trying to survive loudly e...

Can I get a witness? Not for perfection. Not for productivity. Not because I suddenly figured life out. Just… for trying. In this deeply personal episode of Prayers & Cusswords™, Ashley opens up about what it feels like to publicly narrate your pain while privately trying to hold your life together in real time. From caregiving for her mother, struggling emotionally behind the scenes, navigati...

What happens when your inner world is falling apart at the exact moment your outer world starts validating you? In this episode, Ashley unpacks emotional addiction to “potential” — in relationships, careers, healing, and identity. From spiraling over an unanswered text from someone she knows is emotionally out of reach… to avoiding responsibilities while simultaneously building a viral platform… t...

After a viral post sparked thousands of women to share their experiences with limerence, Ashley finds herself in a real-time unraveling: What if limerence isn’t just about romance? What if it’s been shaping how we show up in friendships, family, grief, and even trauma responses? This episode is an unfiltered stream of consciousness exploring dopamine, disconnection, emotional overstimulation, and...

This episode is what spiraling actually sounds like… Not the cute, aesthetic version. The real one. The kind where you’re up at 1:30AM emailing your therapist and psychiatrist, running on no sleep, questioning your job, your future, and your ability to hold it all together. The kind where you say “fuck it” to responsibilities because you genuinely don’t have anything left to give. But somewhere in...

700K views. 1,000 followers. And I haven’t checked my work email in over a week. In this episode, I’m sitting in the tension of it all—celebrating my platform’s growth while preparing for my mom to start treatment tomorrow. This is raw, real-time honesty about: – success that doesn’t feel stable – being self-aware enough to question your own momentum – and what it means to hold pride, fear, grief,...

(Am I Rebuilding or Ruining Everything?) You always knew. You just wanted to be wrong. In this raw, unfiltered episode, Ashley Jaye sits in the uncomfortable space between intuition and self-sabotage—questioning whether she’s rebuilding her life or quietly unraveling everything she worked so hard to become. From career, motherhood, discipline, and identity… to the emotional cost of ignoring that i...

Some mothers are celebrated. Others are… invisible. This is for the woman who is tired of being tired. The one carrying grief, anxiety, and a never-ending to-do list. The one who doesn’t feel like she deserves celebration today. In this unfiltered Mother’s Day episode, Ashley Jaye speaks from the shadows—the overwhelmed, overstimulated, emotionally exhausted version of herself she once called “tox...

This is a love letter. Just not the kind you think. In this episode, Ashley Jaye speaks to the one she won’t name—the one who didn’t stay but still changed everything. The one who felt like a mirror, a lesson, a loop she couldn’t break until she finally chose herself. There’s no anger here. No chasing. No closure conversation. Just truth. About loving someone who never fully held you. About confus...

Content Note: We’re talking about mental health, including moments where life felt too heavy to carry. If that’s where you are right now—pause this, breathe, and reach out. You are not meant to survive this alone. 📞 Call/text  988  (U.S.) 🌍  findahelpline.com Softness is still available to you—even here. It’s Mental Health Awareness Month… and Ashley Jaye is not okay. Not in a polished, inspirat...

I was “high-functioning”… until I wasn’t. In this episode, I unpack what it really means to be a neurodivergent Black woman navigating burnout, misdiagnosis, workplace trauma, and unmasking in real time. From being accused of drug-seeking while trying to get diagnosed… to advocating for myself at work and watching everything shift… to realizing how many relationships were built on performance inst...

What’s the difference between feeling your emotions and explaining them? In this episode of Prayers and Cusswords , I explore the tension between intellectualizing emotions and actually experiencing them. I share why both are important—but how overanalyzing can sometimes lead to misplacing what we haven’t fully felt. If you’ve ever found yourself explaining your emotions instead of sitting in them...

Sometimes I go quiet. Not because I don’t care… but because I don’t have the capacity to show up the way I want to. In this episode, I’m speaking directly to the people who love me through those moments — the ones who still check in, still invite me, still hold space for me even when I disappear. This isn’t an apology. It’s a thank you. If you’ve ever struggled with showing up while navigating you...

I’m going viral… and I don’t even feel good about it. In this episode, I share what it actually feels like to be overwhelmed in real time—navigating mental health, the possibility of losing my job, and unexpected attention all at once. This isn’t about having answers. It’s about what happens when you realize you’re burnt out, misaligned, and still responsible for showing up for your life. If you’v...

I’m on the brink of losing my job. At the same time, my mom is beating cancer… and Shonda Rhimes liked one of my posts. So tell me… how can life feel like it’s falling apart and coming together at the exact same time? In this episode of Prayers and Cusswords , I’m sharing what it feels like to exist in the middle — of uncertainty, identity shifts, and unexpected alignment. This isn’t about having...

In this episode of Prayers and Cusswords , Ashley Jaye shares her personal experience navigating ADHD in the workplace—including receiving an “unsuccessful” performance rating despite measurable impact and contributions. This episode explores: – ADHD and productivity myths – Workplace culture and neurodivergence – Burnout, misalignment, and self-advocacy – Creating alternative paths and purpose-dr...

I Almost Shrunk… But I Remembered Who I Am They laughed. They whispered. They gave me a nickname. Not in high school… At my grown job. And for a second? I almost shrunk. This episode is about workplace bullying, being triggered by old wounds, and the moment you decide you’re not that version of yourself anymore. It’s about reclaiming your power, your presence, and your identity—without waiting for...