PorchTalk 🎱

Xavier and I peacefully and respectfully debate the timeless question of who the best player in NBA history is—the answer is not LeBron James. Thank you for your continued support of our mediocre opinions. Happy Cinco de Mayo to my people in San Jose, wish I was home.

Xavier is back. PorchTalk is back. Lebron is 2-10 in his last 12 playoff games. Orlando Magic, Magic City, Rest in Peace Nipsey, Lebron will be bitching till he's 50 - Celtics 2026 NBA Champions. PorchTalk is the future.

The highly unanticipated return of PorchTalk. My laptop was repossessed because of gambling debts. Babagudu provides his insight on the current state of affairs for the Golden State Warriors. Like Mike in '95 - I'm back

The highly unanticipated return of PorchTalk. Babagudu provides his opinions on the current state of affairs for the Golden State Warriors and their first-round match-up against the Houston Rockets. Like Mike in '95 - I'm back.

The highly unanticipated return of PorchTalk. Babagudu provides his thoughts on the current state of affairs for the Golden State Warriors and their first-round match-up with the Houston Rockets. Like Mike in '95 - I'm Back.

The unanticipated return of PorchTalk. Babagudu provides an update on the current state of affairs for the Golden State Warriors and their first-round matchup against the Houston Rockets. Like Mike in '95 - I'm back.

This was embarrassing. This silenced any Tom Brady v. Patrick Mahomes arguments. Abysmal. Horrendous. Despicable. Terrible. The Cheifs are no longer. This is what happens when you and your wife idolize Donny O'Felon. Cooper DeJean is a dog and Jalen Carter has had quite the year. Nick Schmuckaranni owes Saqoun Barkley his career. It was poetic for the last game of this season to be a boring blowou...

I am frozen. Luka Doncic is a Los Angeles Laker. Luka Doncic is on the same team as Lebron James. For the first time in Lebron James' career, 23 will not be the primary scorer on his team. This ruined my weekend. No team in the NBA beats the Lakers in seven games with a healthy Luka and Lebron.

The NFL playoffs are finally here, and what better way to celebrate than three schmucks with no football experience telling you what's going to happen. The 49er's best player this season was shot by a 14-year-old Norteno a week before the season opener. The team fucking sucks, Mikey tries to kickstart the offseason for Kyle Shanahan. Happy New Year.

The Patriots suck. The Dolphins suck. The 49ers are even worse. Travis Hunter is not the answer in New England. Xavier comes to terms with the realization that the Dolhpins will never be good.

Mama we're back. A month-long hiatus because I got lazy. Embarrassing, Regardless, Travis Hunter should not be the first wide receiver off the board IF he is only being drafted to play wide receiver. Hunter realistically will not play both sides of the football, so if you're drafting him solely based on his wide receiver talents, is Travis Hunter the best wide receiver off the board? No. No, he is...

The United States held a Presidential Election between an overly qualified candidate and a convicted felon. The convicted felon won, which is poetic to the current state of America. You can't get a job at McDonalds with a criminal record, but you can run for President. Thank you for continuing to listen to PorchTalk -A schmuck with a keyboard

The United States held a Presidential Election between an overly qualified candidate and a convicted felon. The convicted felon won, which is poetic of the current state of America. You can't get a job at McDonald's with a criminal record, but you can for President. The Detroit Lions and the Kansas City Chiefs were arguably the two best football teams up to the trade deadline. They both only objec...

The Dodgers were down five runs in the fifth inning. The Dodgers won the game in nine innings. A historical baseball season has officially drawn the curtain with a World Series over the worst fanbase in sports, the New York Yankees. Young Thug agreed to a plea in his RICO case today that sent him home today with 20 years of probation. Xavier renounced his New York citizenship live on air after the...

The World Series is officially over after three games. Aaron Judge has now set an MLB record by striking out 75 times in his last 30 plate appearances which essentially books Juan Soto's one way ticket to LA this offseason. If the Dodgers get Juan Soto the MLB is cooked. Week eight of the NFL season has come to an end and the New England Patriots have the same record as the New York Jets. Half of...

Two Games of World Series baseball have explicitly shown that the Los Angeles Dodgers have won the Pennant. Aaron Judge will go down as one of the worst playoff players of this generation. The Dodgers need to bring Alex Verdugo home this offseason. The Celtics keep rolling; Jayson Tatum scores 37. Lakers win: Lebron and AD combine for 63. Saturday night before week 8 of the NFL season and I have n...

The Minnesota Vikings were robbed on National Television. Should Minnesota be in a position where Sam Darnold has to go 90 yards with one timeout down eight? No. They should not. Regardless, that was one of the most blatant missed facemasks I’ve seen, particularly with the context of the game in mind. The Rams look almost guaranteed to trade Cooper Kupp due solely to his involvement tonight becaus...

The Boston Celtics are objectively the best in basketball, and it is not a conversation to have. Joe Mazzula made it explicitly clear last season that the Celtics would beat you by way of the three-point ball. This has not changed. Not only did the sentiment not change, it improved. The Celtics tied an NBA record for most threes in a game through three-quarters of basketball. They proceed to miss...

The 49ers season is officially over, and I truly may have been too generous with the nine-win prediction, as they may not even win nine games. Detroit and Baltimore both continue to frontrun the race for the Super Bowl. Drake Maye is the truth and will win Rookie of the Year. The NBA season is back, and there is nothing to sell me on why the Boston Celtics won't run it back. NBA futures odds plus...

Week five of the NFL season has come and go and the 49ers still suck. The Patriots were robbed on national television. Alabama gave Vanderbilt their first win in program history against a top five team. Cal embarrasses the Bay Area on primetime TV by blowing a 25 point fourth quarter lead.

Week four of the NFL season is over and the Minnesota Vikings are the best team in football. Sam Darnold looks elite while simultaneously clearing a path for Justin Jefferson to cement his case for being the best wide receiver in football. Robert Salah is now 20-35 as an NFL Head Coach. The experiment is over. The show is over. The cast is tired. Bill Belichick made slight remarks about Jerod Mayo...

Happy Retiring to Derrick Rose from PorchTalk - the greatest 'what if' in sports history, The Dallas Cowboys are not good. This is my formal apology for attempting to sell/promote buying any Dallas Cowboys stock. We can't always be right but I am sorry for accidentally selling snake oil. If you have anything going on in your life that you'd like advice on, go to theporchtalk.net and fill out the '...

Monday Night Football Reactions with Xavier and Mikey

NFL Week Three Reactions with Xavier and Mikey. The 49ers are terrible.

Reactions to a bizarre week two in the NFL with Xander, Xavier, and Talmond.