Sanspants Radio
Plumbing the Death Star
An award winning podcast hosted by three of the worst brains Australia has to offer. Two guys named Joel and their friend answer pop culture’s most important questions in the wrongest way possible. Not a Star Wars podcast. Subscribe to the Bad Brain Boys on Apple Podcasts for even more content to ruin your day. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Author
Sanspants Radio
Category
Podcast website
Latest episode
Jul 4, 2026
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Episodes
How Would You Get the Fox Across the River When You Also Have a Goose and a Bag of Beans? 26.01.2025 56:38
It's one of the oldest riddles (or puzzles (apparently it's a puzzle, there's a lot of disbelief and arguments at this)) ever told! You are on one side of the river with a goose, a fox and a bag of beans and you have to get to the other side by a boat carrying one at a time. However, if you leave the fox with the goose that fox will straight up devour that goose and if you leave the goose with the...
How Would You Pitch the Truman Show to Investors? 18.01.2025 41:21
Oh shade! That's what the boys needed! Now somewhat out of the sun the Plumbing Boys can bring Pooling the Poolstar to a close by trying to pitch the Truman Show to investors. Zammit isn't sure that a company should own a baby, Jackson wants desperately to live in the moon and Duscher shills for Big Crack. So chuck on the boob tube and flick over to your favorite show of all time "Screwin' with Tr...
How Would You Huff and Puff and Kill Those Three Little Pigs? 12.01.2025 31:31
Plumbing the Death Star has been in the pool for too long and the sun is starting to get to them. You can tell. Duscher's head is burning. Maybe because of this they're turning their attention to fairy tales and trying to eat the three little pigs. Duscher wants to ramraid the pigs brick house, Zammit is unclear if destroying a tent is a crime, and Jackson invents the Hambulance, with truly terrib...
How Would You Use Chameleon's Powers (as Seen in Kraven the Hunter) To Take Over the Mob? 05.01.2025 45:39
Can you believe it's that time of year again? The much anticipated Pooling the Poolstar! Or Pooling the Deathstar? Whatever, who cares, it's hot and we're in a pool. After cooking our brains by seeing Kraven four times in one day for our sister show Baseless Speculation we figured we'd further cook our brains by sitting directly in the sun and having a think about Kraven, categorically the worst t...
How Would You Die as Uncle Ben? 29.12.2024 53:52
Plumbing the Death Star has a long history of misremembering how Uncle Ben died. Who shot him? Why? Uncle Guts? Well in this episode JoshAus let's the boys revisit that incredible event to ask, hey, how would we have died as Uncle Ben? There's very little great power, and even less great responsibility but there are plenty of references to the movie Old Boy, driving over your own head, and getting...
How Would You Use Frosty’s Hat for Personal Gain or Financial Profit? 22.12.2024 1:12:39
Merry Christmas from Plumbing the Death Star! To bring in the hollyest and jollyest of seasons the boys decide to exploit the magic old hat that brought frosty the snowman to life. Unsurprisingly it instantly turns into a ghoulish necromantic mess. It's a yuletide nightmare as bodies are brought back from the dead, billionairs are scammed, and men become double men, whatever that means. So heat up...
Which Alien Would Be the Worst to Be Abducted By? 15.12.2024 55:26
Oh no! Space aliens have taken a keen interest in plumbing the death star and decided to abduct them. What will befall our intrepid trio? Well, Zammit almost instantly dies from exposure, Jackson gets stranded in the past, and Duscher goes to court for a crime he didnt do (but easily could have). There's way less probe talk in this episode than you'd think. Not 0, obviously, there was going to be...
How Would You Dunk Achilles Into the River to Make Him Better (and No You Just Can't Throw Him In)? 08.12.2024 47:18
No form of pop culture is safe from Plumbing the Death Star, and that includes ancient greek mythology. JohnnyImperfectAlien from the Sanspants Radio discord, asks the boys to give their strategies for dunking their baby boy Achilles in the river styx. To no one's surprise their baby almost instantly gets swept away and Jackson starts eating snakes and then they start remembering the movie conehea...
Would You Take the Substance from the Substance? 01.12.2024 55:25
In the movie the Substance Demi Moore takes the Substance and gives birth to a Substance baby played by Margaret Qualley, and that's only the start of her problems. Well what if Plumbing the Death Star took the substance, what would that be like? A mess is the answer. We're talking old knobs and baffling talk show appearances. It's not pretty. If you've ever wanted to know what Rupert Grint's favo...
Which Would be the Worst Fictional Character to Sit Next to on an International Flight? 24.11.2024 58:52
Plumbing the Death Star has reunited after their UK tour and just in time for the Cheerful Earful Podcast festival, and they're talking planes and air travel. Jackson is scared the hulk will suck him like a lollipop, Duscher somehow ends up joining the Fellowship of the Ring, and Zammit gets put up for adoption. So buckle your seatbelt, make sure the tray table is up, shut the window, and get read...
Who Actually is the Worst Wolverine? 17.11.2024 51:30
In the movie Deadpool and Wolverine they say that their Wolverine is the worst Wolverine because he got drunk once at the wrong time. The Plumbing Boys find that unsatisfactory. Surely there’s a worse Wolverine than that, gotta be. Zammit imagines a Wolvie who kept his chauffer license and loves his job, Jackson creates the greatest Plumbing riff of all time, and Duscher performs many incredible o...
How Would You Re-Design Aquaman? 10.11.2024 53:44
With basically no plan Plumbing the Death Star launch into the question today. How would you redesign Aquaman? For what? Who knows. Zammit wants him bald and mutilated, possibly so he more resembles a fish, or maybe for some other esoteric reason known only to him. Jackson sees him as a fisherman of sorts, forgetting that fishermen are the enemy of fish and fish are the friend of Aquaman, and Dusc...
How Would You Use Minority Report? 03.11.2024 1:01:14
Remember in Minority Report where if you thought about murdering someone they put you in a tube? The big tube you’re in forever alongside a bunch of other guys stacked six people high. Well here at Plumbing the Death Star we think that’s probably an imperfect system. Zammit is shocked that cops could be made even lazier, Jackson tries to become the worlds worst realtor, and Duscher wants you to se...
How Would You Exploit the Pet Sematary for Personal Gain or Profit? 27.10.2024 58:14
It’s our lucky day! We’ve gained unique access to a cemetery where if you bury something it comes back wrong! While we struggle to find the bit Zammit comes up with a hairbrained scheme involving cheap meats and a sack, JD has a longwinded plan involving a certain gorilla and Jackson wants to get back at poachers by encouraging poaching. Sometimes dead is better and sometimes the best laid plans o...
Why Would You Interview a Vampire? 20.10.2024 51:43
Your editor's lined up the interview of a lifetime! You're gonna win that emmy but for journalists, a Pulitzer Prize? Weird to call something we give out to people that do a good job at journalism a prize like it's something you won at a carnival handed out by a clown. Anyway, forget Frost/Nixon it's you/a vampire! What an incredible get! You get to sit down and talk to some old guy who spent most...
How Would You Raise the Devil? 13.10.2024 1:00:15
It’s my three dads as three dads do their best to raise a demon baby! You see, these three dads don’t have a kid and this here demon kid doesn’t have three dads! It truely is a match made in heaven. Well actually hell. Or more practically Italy we think? JD takes us through the plot of Omen while Zammit get m-pregged and Jackson gets caught up in a Diet Coke baby scandal. Who knew raising a baby w...
Which Fictional Character Would Make the Best Best Person (at a Wedding)? 06.10.2024 55:33
Hey, never say Plumbing the Death Star never did anything for you. Best Man PJ asked Plumbing the Death Star for a shoutout for his mates Tom’s wedding and they went and did a whole episode instead. A wedding themed episode, no less. Jackson asks Professor X to be his best person and crosses some personal boundaries, Zammit opts for Superman and, uh, yeah, we’d like it if he’d get our Step Mum bac...
Could You Be A Better Boyfriend than Peter Parker? 29.09.2024 53:38
Peter Parker you're not a good boyfriend. You never puts MJ first, you're always missing her plays or other events that are important to her. We understand your uncle's car crash gave you powers or whatever and because of that you stop crime as Car Uncle Man but Peter, you can't predict the future and we're fairly sure your Car Uncle, Cuncle Ben, wouldn't have wanted you to stop that car that kill...
After All, What is a Wonderwall? 22.09.2024 49:35
Oasis is getting back together to the surprise of pretty much everyone, prompting Plumbing the Death Star to ask: hey what exactly is a wonderwall anyway? Why would someone be one? And what does it have to do with the classic Pixar Cars franchise? Duscher has some strong opinions on the game of Downball, Zammit theorises about an invisible wall that is also Car Heaven, and Jackson remembers the mo...
How Would You Survive a Quiet Place? 15.09.2024 1:03:54
Things are off to a bad start when Zammit wants to de-voice himself and JD wraps himself in a blanket before landing on 'being on a boat' would be the best way to survive a Quiet Place. However, now what? They don't know how to fish, discussion of desalination only leads to yelling which is the one thing they really shouldn't do. The boys argue about magnetic south, try to eat fish bones and fail...
Which Fictional Child Would Be the Best to Step-Dad (Live)? 08.09.2024 57:08
Recorded live at the Comedy Republic in Melbourne on August 22nd 2024, the boys dared to ask Which Fictional Child Would Be the Best to Step-Dad? Zammit is going to be a father soon and the other two will also be there so what better way to test their fathering mettle with their approach to fatherhood with fictional children? You need to ask yourself, who did it best (or the least worst) as genera...
What Would Be the Worst Mutant Ability to Awaken Within You? 01.09.2024 1:17:35
Puberty is never good. It's even worse when your teeth are little guys, you can explode exactly one (1) time or Wolverine is there to welcome you into the X-Men while you wait in a cave. Today the clever geniuses at Plumbing the Death Star are asking what the worst mutant ability to awaken with. Zammit wants us all to have big thinks or be pig warmers, Jackson experiences a very bad morning before...
How Would You Use the Powers of a Baby to Rob a Bank? 25.08.2024 1:03:35
This is pop culture. We swear. Springsteen wrote a song (and a book) so it counts! Outlaw Pete is about a bank-robbing baby whose exploits become a meditation on sin, fate, and free will. Springsteen himself said it’s essentially the story of a man trying to outlive and outlast his sins! Now the sin is robbing a bank and the man is a baby but it still counts! But we here at Plumbing the Death Star...
Which Child Would Have Been the Best Heir to the Wonka Throne? 18.08.2024 54:33
Sure Charlie Bucket got the factory because everyone else failed quicker, but was that the best move by Wonka? Running a business is hard work. Running a questionable legal chocolate manufacturing business with multiple scandals involving workers rights, fair pay and strange and unique injuries to guests is possibly harder. We don’t think Charlie has it in him to bribe officials or squash any diss...
Which Real Life Animal Would Make the Best Pokemon? 11.08.2024 52:36
In Pokemon-realm there’s only three things to do: fight, breed or sell bicycle and the Plumbing Boys are all out of Pokemon. There might also be beauty show? We’re unclear if that’s true. There’s a lot of horse kick math from the leading experts of getting kicked in the head (by horse) that results in a very bad day at the circus and realising that a lot of animals struggle against rock, hate bein...
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