Pitney & Amelia's Bitchen Boutique

It's Thanksgiving time again, and we've got some new tales of gratitude for you! Amelia talks about the radio program that's been inspiring her for almost a quarter century, and a TV show that finally lived up to its potential. Pitney talks about how being fabulous enriches his life and how his friends are the most supportive family anyone could ask for. And we give huge props to the #PodernFamily...

This week is a bit of a mishmash. First, Pitney tells Amelia about the new Kingsmen movie and how the theater he went to was also a church begging for congregants. Creepy. Then Amelia unloads about the new kind of stupid people she's been dealing with at work and how they make her stabbity. And Pitney had a dream so strange it freaked out his therapist! what do YOU think it means? All that and a q...

Happy Halloween and a Blessed Samhain to you all! Get ready for an episode jam-packed with Halloween goodies! Amelia teaches you about why stereotypical witches wear pointy black hats, have brooms and cats, and boil things in cauldrons! And Pitney teaches us all sorts of crazy things about bats! Plus we debut two new semi regular segments: Hatin' on Satan (a look at people who blame Satan for ever...

It's Friday the 13th! Are you superstitious? Even a little bit? Pitney and Amelia discuss all the weird superstitious things they do, even if they have no idea why. Knocking on wood, not stepping on a crack, praying to st Anthony, not opening umbrellas indoors, and some really goofy ones. And then, in honor of Friday the 13th, Pitney shares a Jason Voorhees find with Amelia that makes her jump up...

Did you hear about the woman who lost her job because she got her period at work? Amelia is pissed off, and thinks if women talked about their periods more often and with more people, someday men wouldn't be so scared and dumb about such a basic biological reality. And guess who else lost her job because of her period? (Well, sorta.) Verity. You'll love it. And Pitney hates seeing movies in public...

Amelia realized that Pitney's dog Joxer had been in several episodes (barking and snuffling and squeaky toys and whatnot) so she decided to bring her dog Spike into the room. Not necessarily the best idea, but it's his turn to be famous. Star Wars. We love it. Really we do. But it can stand to be criticized and picked apart. You might be surprised which episodes are Pitney's favorites and which he...

The death of Chester Bennington affected Pitney more profoundly than he expected. He's attended memorials all over Texas (at the time of this recording, he had only gone to one) and has found the outpouring of love and support inspiring. We talk about Chester and Linkin Park and what their music means to Pitney. And we talk about other artists, such as David Bowie, Michael Jackson, Joni Mitchell,...

Pitney and Amelia discuss the proper way to fold a bath towel and make a bed. Do you go longways or crossways? Do your nice sides touch? Do you throw sixteen pillows on the floor every night? These things are important! Tick talk. We talk ticks. And fleas. And sing about them. And it's all Tricia's fault. Then Amelia tells the story of what clogged an 80 year old sewer pipe. And just what DID happ...

Pitney interviews Kerrville "Kerrverts" Iris and Marie. The joys of face and body painting (and the sorrows of using the wrong kind of paint), what gets you attached to certain events and draws you back year after year, and their weirdest memories of this pretty-weird festival. Amelia has comments and questions, and the answer to one question makes her scream in horror. (Here's some hints: vampire...

Sometimes little things can set off the strangest conversations! Amelia read an article to Pitney about Breatharians (idiots who think we're going to believe they never eat food and live instead off of "cosmic energy"), and then the discussion turned to the crazy woo-woo things some people believe. And a woman who is a bit too close to her wolf pelts. And how Tricia Von Lichtenstein used to draw r...

Pitney is back from the Kerrville Folk Festival, where he had a marvelous time and interviewed a bunch of crazy Kerrverts! He shares his interview with Joel and Jordan, while he and Amelia interject from time to time with comments that take them off into their typical tangents! Renfaire, the douchebags of Coachella, multi-hole latrines, Paris Hilton, you name it! And we didn't get permission in ti...

Sometimes hip and happening means old-school and over. Why would Austin decide its airport needed to go back in time? And do the super-cool lack sweat glands? Pitney and Amelia question the sanity behind some weird new developments at ABIA. Then we kvetch about how Austin has changed over the years, and how you can't still claim you're a city for artists and musicians when none of them can afford...

What's Pitney's favorite word? What's Amelia's least favorite sound? This week, we took the Bernard Pivot Questionnaire, better known as that thing James Lipton does at the end of Inside the Actors' Studio. We learned some stuff about ourselves and each other! Then we peruse the Photo Gallery on the Mar-A-Lago website (http://www.maralagoclub.com) and make comments about what we see. You would not...

IT'S OUR ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY, YOU GUYS! :partyhorn: This is amazing. We can't thank you all enough for the support. So we decided to make you something: it's a clip show! If you're new to us, this episode is a bit of a sampler platter. If you've been listening for a while, we hope this features some of your favorite moments from our first year! A list of clips and the episodes from whence they ca...

It's our Texas Frightmare Weekend Special! Come with us to the Hyatt Regency hotel in the DFW airport (seriously!) as we celebrate one of our favorite nerdy pleasures! HORROR MOVIES! First, as we enjoy delicious pints of beer in the hotel bar, we sit down with a friend to discuss what distinguishes horror from other types of movies. Is Silence of the Lambs a horror film? Is Psycho? What about the...

Omigod, like bag those toenails! Amelia desperately needs a pedicure, and we talk about how fabulous toenail polish is. Then Pitney shares a story you just will NOT believe about a crazy woman who showed up to a poolside potluck and changed his life forever. Texas Frightmare Weekend is coming up soon, and we're excited that Chris Sarandon is going to be there, not only because we love Fright Night...

Who is Florence Foster Jenkins? Your new muse, that's who! Learn about this fascinating woman who sang her heart out despite being rather terrible at it, who became the toast of New York during the days of Toscanini and Caruso, and who inspired a movie that would earn Meryl Streep her 20th Oscar nomination. Hear about the world of ladies' clubs, tableaux vivants, and the scourge of syphilis. But m...

This week we're giving you a little of everything! We talk about a scary way women used to clean their ladybits, recurring dreams and nightmares, refusing to comply with dress codes, yelling at cake, Barbie's musical career in the 80s and 90s, and the way Amelia tends to attract guys who pretend to be famous. And in the middle of it all, we declare our undying love for Tim Curry and our reasons fo...

You have GOT to DESTROY that MATTRESS! Amelia is delving into the world of Hellraiser and Pitney helps her along on her journey, as they discuss what the movies are about, their obsession with Skinless Julia and that damn mattress, and the time Pitney made Doug Bradley (Pinhead) laugh! It's Ceno-bitchen! Have you been wondering where this podcast name comes from? It's a funny story. Actually, it's...

Pitney and Amelia are nothing if not gourmet! Listen as they share their love of experimenting in the kitchen and experiencing new cuisines, telling stories of how they learned to cook, sharing tips and recipes, and insisting on the French pronunciation of La Croix. Then Pitney gives us a Verity two-fer: TWO stories about Verity's weird attitude towards boxed macaroni and cheese! We love you for l...

Privilege. Many of us have it, and most don't understand what it is and get super defensive when the subject comes up. Amelia explains one kind of privilege that you probably have and she doesn't. You see, she's lefthanded, and life isn't as easy for her as it is for righthanded people. She won't rest until you appreciate how the world is literally, physically laid out for you, ya righthanded bast...

Welcome to a Valentine's Day episode filled with utterly unromantic stuff! Amelia hates Valentine's Day. HATES. IT. Find out her many reasons, including one story of a Valentine's dinner date gone horribly awry! Then, speaking of horrors, Pitney talks about his love of My Bloody Valentine, and the St. Valentine's Day massacre! Plus a really icky Von Lichtenstein story! You'll laugh, you'll cringe,...

New year, new crap to complain about.   People who set themselves up for failure with bullshit resolutions. Our new President and his nonsense. Commercials that are so dumb they make us want to stab someone.   Plus a story about Verity Noslen and your first listen to an Audio Subtweet!   We love you for listening! Please take a moment to rate and review us!   Questions? Comments? Complaints? Write...

Pitney explains his obsession with organized crime and  mafia documentaries, and talks about his personal childhood encounters with mobsters and their shady dealings. Then Amelia jumps in with a quick story about the Worst Person in the World. Please excuse Pitney's very excited dog Joxer making a racket in the background with the squeaky toy. He's a good puppy. We love you for listening! Please t...

Happy Holidays! This week, we talk about family traditions and how families come up with their own special way of celebrating Christmas. Trees, fancy or no? Or both? Does Santa wrap presents? When do you open presents? There's a lot that goes into a Christmas tradition! Then Amelia surprises Pitney with a festive Christmas edition of the game "Fuck Marry Kill!" Play along at our website or on Twit...