Pisstacular Takes: The Podcast Home for UrinatingTree

There may be a Super Bowl about to get underway in a few days, but for many teams, they've been in offseason mode for about a month. Eighteen franchises stuck on the couch wondering what the hell went wrong. There are the preseason darlings who fell way short of expectations, the groups that outright imploded on themselves with endless drama, the ones that fell to shit from the opening salvo,...

This took a sharp turn over the last 24 hours, hasn't it? I had to near-completely re-write the script after Tomlin. This episode is going to be very level-headed and rational. No seething at an incredibly uninspired hire here. Replacing Mike Tomlin with Offensive-minded and Yinzer Mike Tomlin. Artie II lives in his fears. Prepare for another year of Aaron Rodgers at the helm. 9-8 Super Bowl o...

Everyone in Buffalo has fallen to the drink, yet there isn't anywhere close to enough of it to drown out the pain that's consumed them all whole. What happened in Denver was quite the way to lose. Nobody circles the wagons of futility like the Buffalo Bills. And that's not getting into what happened to the Broncos, either. Brutal.

What a complete waste of talent. Something that most of us could see coming from a mile away happened: Philly's offense (once again) shit the bed due to terrible playcalling and coaching (thank you, Patullo and Sirianni) as the defense is unable to bail them out at every turn (and they try). AJ Brown drops everything in sight as people will (hopefully) be getting fired for this mess of a seaso...

This is the kind of loss that destroys franchises. Green Bay completely collapsed with an 18-point lead to surrender 25 points and rip hearts out everywhere. Not only that, but they did it against one of their most hated rivals. And it happened twice in the span of a month. Abearica rises and talks endless shit against hated brother to the north, and all Green Bay has to blame are themselves. Even...

NASCAR had themselves a 2025. Oh yeah, they most certainly did indeed. Whether it be another round of controversial championship races, a playoff structure that no one likes, and an anti-trust trial that gave even more of a black eye to the sport than before (let's not even get into the text messages). An executive branch that refuses to believe that their methods are lead to a fate worse than...

Watch some good ass content from other creators! Squidtard Sports -    / @squidtardsports   Red5478 -    / @red_5478   TubFrog -    / @tubfrog   Sumo Food -    / @futagoyama-sumofood   Michael MacKelvie -    / @michaelmackelvie   Another year has come and gone. This is the moment where we all get reflective, teary-eyed, and (in my case) very whiny. No real complaints on my end besides the usual th...

Chaos. Beautiful chaos (although in some team's cases, they'd prefer that not to be the case). This year has been on all of the drugs, and that may not be an accurate enough description. As Sportsball slowly boils me alive, the NFL Season is nearing its end (thankfully for any potential NHL/MLB content). We have one more week to go, and while a majority of the divisions and playoff spots a...

The Football Gods apparently wished for endless chaos for Christmas and we ended up with a week of pure insanity as a result. A Game of the Week contender on Thursday (made an episode about it over the weekend). A sudden surge to swipe a game away two days later. And then Steelers/Lions. At least the final two minutes. Good lord. Some teams have all the luck. Some of us get to bask in the blessing...

The fabric of the NFL has changed dramatically over the past week. Injuries have devastated several franchise this week (including a team that was knocked out of the playoffs), and several blowouts have all but solidified a few tickets to January. We finally have a couple of teams that have clinched. Thank the lord for that. Only five teams left to be eliminated, three weeks left in the season. Bu...

It's so easy to forget how recently we were given the gift of an onscreen scorebug from the gods. allow us to look back to see where we have come from in such a short amount of time. Written by ‪@TalkToNic‬ Edited by @TalktoNicscript editor: ‪@UrinatingTree‬ Voice Over: ‪@UrinatingTree‬

We're so far into the season yet we still know so little about anybody at this point. Any trends are near-immediately quashed from week-to-week. Players, teams, even entire divisions a maddening pool of inconsistency. Every team sucks and nobody's any good. All we get is chaos. Unpredictability. Confusion and calamity. Week Fourteen, like many others, was full of... things. Many, many thin...

Proudly brought to you by The Lane Kiffin Foundation! Sabotaging your football teams from within since 2007.What is the NFL: A shitload of parity where any team can win any given week or a league where every team sucks? Knowing this league, the answer's probably both and none of them at the same time. The only constants are the teams at the bottom sucking. Everything else is fair game. So enou...

It's finally here: After weeks of slowly chipping away at it due to family events and the NFL forcing me to row in its hypothetical galley, the MLB Debriefing is only about a month late. Next year, it'll probably be two months late, knowing football and the sheer consumption of my will and being. That being said, this episode is dedicated to the eighteen teams in baseball that didn't g...

Turkey Day is here, my friends! May your day be filled with delicious turkey, stuffed full of the finest W's that the NFL has to offer. Come to the table of football, where there's a seat for everyone. Yes, even the crazy uncle rambling about conspiracies about how the league is rigged (is he really wrong, though?) and the aunt that makes terrible casserole that you tolerate simply to plea...

The home stretch is within view. The first teams will soon fall to elimination. Nobody close to clinching yet, however. This is when things start to fall into place, but has much really fallen into place? The league is drunk, it's the epitome of chaos, and nothing is set in stone in a given week (unless you are Atlanta or Washington, then you're simply doomed). Five walkoff field goals in...

Proudly sponsored by absolutely nothing! Use promo code TREE to tell me to get a real job! What is this season? Terribly good or excellently bad? Yes? All of the above? I guess a few more things are starting to reveal themselves... perhaps. A few teams suck, but most of the so-called Super Bowl contenders have their warts (or don't even look like it at all). I'll take it, and the Texans ma...

There is madness in the air. Definitely madness. Apparently no team is good and everyone sucks. Or the Gods want endless chaos before the Chiefs play the Eagles in the Super Bowl yet again. I swear the NFL is fucking with us, but I can't prove it. There were even trades! Seismic ones! Name-brand players on the move in moves that could change the trajectory of contenders... or continue their de...

A peaceful week of NFL football? One where this episode isn't over a half hour with craziness out the wazoo? I can honestly get used to this. I needed a reprieve from getting my ass kicked on the video front. The football world, though? Lots of blowouts and refball. Especially refball. And one of the greatest tragedies in recent history. You know exactly what I'm talking about. I'm goi...

Another week of NFL Football has come and gone. We still know absolutely nothing about the league hierarchy. Wait, I'm wrong. There is one thing that's certain: The Jets, Dolphins, Raiders, and Titans fucking suck. This is the only take that can be said with conviction as of now. Otherwise, the league is entirely drunk. BAC of .25. Chaos and disorder everywhere. Nothing is safe. Nobody can...

Emphasis on extra late! Somehow it didn't get shelved until December this time? I don't get it either. Started on this project in early September yet it's still almost two weeks late. Gotta love it. Also gotta love hockey. Another season is about to begin as thirty-two teams seek to accomplish their respective goals: Be it from securing a top draft pick, making progress on their rebuil...

Who is a Super Bowl contender? Who will break out of the mosh pit to assert themselves as an elite team? Will the so-called favorites this year get out of their own way. The answer to all of those questions so far is no. This time, we get a year full of parity and fresh blood... by apparently going back to the mid-2000's in the AFC. The Patriots, Colts, Steelers, Broncos, and Chargers at the t...

Arizona lost the football. The League's own football, touched by the Commisioner's hand. Take my advice, and a pistol formation, and go behind the blue tent, and blow up what's left of your team. NOTE: If you're confused, the episode this is inspired by is from the series Sharpe. Thank the YT algorithm for introducing me to it.

This league is unbelievably drunk. Save me. Please save me from the horrors that I've witnessed this week. Arizona. That is all. I will stumble and fall like Trevor Lawrence near the goalline. Just like this episode. It probably is as drunk as the league as well.

Full Injury Depiction & Updates 🌳 SUBSCRIBE FOR MORE 🌳 Written by ‪@TalkToNic‬ @UrinatingTreeEdited by ‪@TalkToNic‬