Parenting The Adlerian Way

Parenting infants is a high demand job, and the single most important thing new parents can do is to establish a deep emotional bond. In this episode Dr Joanna and I discuss how exactly to go about that, as well as the things that can get in the way. We talk about maternal mental health, father bonding, breast vs bottle, bed sharing and much more!  To get a copy of her book:  The Baby Bo...

We often overlook the important transition from having been a student your whole life, to addressing the question of “what’s next?”. This is a time of self-discovery like never before. Hillary Spiritos joins me on the podcast to talk about this unique phase of life and her “Bat Outta Hell” coaching company with her model and method for helping this cohort challenge themselves to look deep and see...

Q1. First grader doesn’t want to go to school or do homework. Q2. Parents with three children - including one with gluten and sugar sensitivities and global developmental delay and ADHD – want to ensure they eat well and don’t develop a bad relationship with food.  Q3. Should all kids be made to experience a consequence when only one child misbehaved? Looking for more Adlerian wisdom? Check o...

I had a great discussion with world-leading expert and author, Jonathan Alderson, about autism, it’s changed definition, and rising occurrence rates. He emphasized the need for individual treatment plans that consider time and order and the importance of early intervention. I was shocked at the number of families on long wait lists for services. To solve this, he created The Thrive Guide, a digita...

In this episode, Titania shares key insights from her latest book on how parents can keep their kids safe online without getting overwhelmed or feeling guilty. We discuss the importance of learning how to use your kids’ tech, why “delay is the way”, and how to ensure that we as parents don’t fall into the trap of 'NMK' (Not My Kid). Follow Titania Jordan here:  https://www.instagram.com/titan...

Q1. Nanny wants to respond properly to a 2yr old’s large emotional displays. Q2. 7yr old still needs a parent laying down with her to fall asleep – and this can take hours! Q3. 7yr old behaves at school but is kicking, hitting, swearing, and taunting brother at home. Q4. How to teach my 5 1/2yr old to be more co-operative and less bossy.  Thank you to FeedSpot for selecting “Parenting the Adl...

Dr. Shonna Masse has been practicing dentistry for 27 years. She is a board-certified paediatric dentist and is the founder of The Children’s Dental Centre and The Orthodontic Dental Centre, in Toronto, Ontario. In this episode I learned the difference between pediatric and family dentistry.  The distinction is important, and her additional qualifications means she is armed with the best appr...

Former pediatric occupational therapist Lisa Chan learned a great deal from her years working with children in schools, homes and in her office. During that time, she saw a gap in the services available. While she would offer important help to children, it was more likely the teachers and parents who were the “first responders”, and they did not always know how to respond to these children’s uniqu...

Q1. 4yr old insists that all the Easter candy is hers to eat. How to manage the deluge of sweets?  Q2. Adult child moved back home but spends his day gaming. A tech agreement isn’t age appropriate now. What else can we do as parents?  Q3. My daughter wants a pet but is irresponsible, so I have said no, and it’s now a fight. Thank you to FeedSpot for selecting “Parenting the Adlerian Way”...

Kyla Fox is an eating disorder specialist, survivor and advocate who reframes the way that we think about, and treat, eating disorders. As someone who struggled with disordered eating during her teen years, Kyla experienced the large care gaps and fundamental flaws in the treatment and recovery approach that prevents patients from getting the help that they need. Listen in as we discuss what paren...

It was wonderful to have Ned Johnson back on the podcast to talk about his new workbook for parents. This is a companion book to “The Self-Driven Child: The Science and Sense of Giving Your Kids More Control Over Their Lives”. We discuss the importance of having control as a protective factor in preventing youth mental health challenges, especially with anxiety and depression.   Here are...

Q1. Anxious about letting my 12yr old daughter walk home from school alone. Q2. Considerations for allowing 17 yr old daughter to go on a beach vacation without supervision?  Q3. Helping a hurting 13yr old girl who told a boy she likes him and then all her friends turned on her.  Q4. Small-for-his-age 8yr old might get hurt playing hockey. Should I encourage a different sport?  If y...

It’s not every day that you get to interview the former editor of the New York Times parenting section! I have been following KJ Dell’Antonia since she managed Motherlode and it was great meeting her finally, and discussing her book, “How To Be a Happier Parent”. KJ generously provided some of the research and practical wisdom that every parent can benefit from if they want to be happier while the...

I met Nick Moon in Nepal on a recent service / trekking trip in support of the NGO “Empowering Nepali Girls”. Over our time together I learned about Nick’s childhood diagnosis of autism and how the education system failed him, how a special teacher finally understood him, and a mother who was also a counsellor advocated for him. He was a marine, a tradesman and now a counsellor in practice sharing...

Q1. 12yr old girl who has become super-quiet. What to do? Q2. My teen doesn’t want to join any clubs, do I force him?  Q3. My son says he is trying to find a job, but not really. Do I cut off his allowance? Q4. My kids leave their stuff laying around and I nag but they never pick it up. Looking for more Adlerian wisdom? Check out The Daily Adler Newsletter If you have a question you’d like an...

In this episode, I talk with James Rilling, psychologist and author of “Father Nature: The Science of Paternal Potential”. Did you know that only five percent of mammals care for their young? Yup, and humans are one of the species that do! James explains the science behind testosterone, oxytocin and changes that occur for fathers. Plus, the importance of father caregiving and provisioning and the...

Rocky Garrison is one of our Adlerian greats. In this interview Rocky talks about the Individual Psychology model of human development including the development of a fictional final goal and how we develop beliefs about self, others, and the world to sustain this goal and the movement toward it. In this model of development, Rocky shares that the courage to meet the challenges of life constructive...

Q1. Teen boy is shutting down outside interests and turning to tech but won’t open up about it. Q2. 13yr old daughter won’t wear her orthodontic elastics and teeth are shifting now.  Q3. Ways for 3 and 5 year olds to find their sense of power in pro-social ways (instead of power over others).  Do you have a parenting question for me? Email them to hello@alysonschafer.com and I’ll answer...

Sarah Allen Benton has been a parent in recovery from alcoholism for more than 20 years. She is a counselling psychologist who specializes in addiction and recognizes how parents and their children can quietly but significantly be impacted by alcoholism. We discuss her “field guide to recovery” for parents that is based on a growth-focused lifestyle change, including emotional sobriety across the...

Q1. Teen boy makes the same unreasonable requests and then storms about, rude and angry.  Q2. How to establish authority and connection when you are the less dominant parent in a traditional family where the dominant father works, and the less dominant mother stays home and does all the child care.  Q3. How can I help my 10 and 13 year old boys get along peacefully?  Q4. How to supp...

Dr Funke Afolabi-Brown has dedicated her medical career to helping families function better and achieve more by improving their relationship to sleep. We discuss the importance of sleep and unique approaches to help with typical sleep challenges that parents face.  Check out more about Dr Funke Afolabi-Brown’s book “Beyond Tired: A Sleep Physicians Guide to Solving Your Child’s Sleep Problems...

Yes! That is the title of the new book by Ruth Strunz, a welcome addition to the literature for clinicians, teachers (and parents) working with autistic / neurodiverse people. In this episode I talk to Ruth about the contents of her book and the unique approaches needed for creating a an atmosphere of calm to reduce dysregulation, masking, creating a therapeutic alliance in new ways, the role of b...

Q1. 12yr old doesn’t want to either lie, nor rat on her friends to the substitute teacher re: homework. Q2. 9yr old wants to drop out of extracurricular activities as soon as they prove challenging.   Q3. Early reader wants to go back and start from the beginning of the book every time they get a word wrong. Q4. 12yr daughter doesn’t do basic chores without me yelling. Too involved in he...

October is breast cancer awareness month. A parent’s cancer diagnosis has a huge impact on the entire family. Thankfully, Audrey saw this gap in services and support and created a brilliant non-profit organization to assist parents and children going through this experience.  Audrey discusses how to talk to children about cancer and dying. She helps us understand what families need for suppor...

Julie Cole is the mother of 6 and the co-founder of the multiple award-winning business Mabel’s Labels.  In this episode we discuss Julie’s career and family success and the parallel skills and life hacks needed to make them both work in a joyful way. If you’re thinking of starting a business to accommodate motherhood, this is a must listen!  You can find out more about Julie, her book,...