Parenting Paused

Stories are a big part of our parenting journey. So many stories, ideas, beliefs, fantasies, nightmares, so much of our parenting journey is made up of stories.   And most of the time, those stories are about the past.   Or they're about the future. I don't know about you, but, oh, my gosh, when my child was young and had behaviors that were scary, I projected way out into the future of how she wa...

Do you ever feel like you want to give up? Runaway, disappear, just give it all up in your parenting.   Well, if you do, it's OK. It's important to see this desire as a messenger, not a destroyer. If you hear yourself saying, "I can't do this anymore" take heart. It's an opportunity to ask yourself what ways am I being that aren't working any longer? Am I giving too much and refusing to receive? A...

Truly Listening to our children can be a challenge!   Often when they are sharing their hearts - we jump ahead to what our response will be and stop listening to what is being said.   What would it be like to suspend your judgment and say "tell me more?" Opening your heart to seeing, hearing, and understanding the feelings without coming to a conclusion about the story is an empowered movement.  ...

As strange as it sounds, I almost forgot to become a mama this lifetime!   It was a deep inexplicable calling that finally led me to take the courageous step of adopting my daughter as a single mom.   I still remember the exact moment they placed my precious daughter in my arms.   What a GIFT!   Tune in to hear more of this story and explore the power of the gift our children bring.   http://www.p...

I don't know about you- but when I became a parent I was SURE I was going to be easy-going, relaxed, and fun!   What actually happened was I tried to control all sorts of things! Food, screens, taking a walk. Not very much fun for my daughter.   As I turned inward I met a rigidity and fear which led to my controlling behavior. No wonder I needed to control.   Tune in and explore this topic while l...

Empathy! Compassion!   Such big words expected in parenting these days!   Are you challenged understanding how these concepts come into your daily parenting practice. The books make it sound so lovely and easy. Yet, as a child, if you weren't offered compassion when expressing your big feelings it is challenging to offer this to your child and even more so to yourself.   Tune in to hear Purejoy's...

Do you experience resistance as you step into new parenting practices?   Is that resistance coming from your head or your heart?   Your mind is filled with information and yet can be in conflict with your actual heart experience.   Tune into this episode to meet yourself right where you are, offering kindness while opening to parenting from the heart.   Learn the SafeSeat practice at  http://www.p...

Sounds like a wonderful conscious idea? Right?   I don't know about you, but it sounded so lovely and I was determined to make it happen.   In reality most of the time I was thinking about the future, how things might end up - a beautiful fantasy or nightmare.   Or, I would pull on the past relying on the information from my conditioning.   Both of these scenarios took me out of the moment!   Tune...

Where do your parenting strategies come from? Who are the experts?   In parenting, oftentimes, it's easy to get confused and misdirected on who to trust. It's hard to be confident in your knowing.   What if you could fully trust yourself?   It's really hard to do- and there's a good reason why.   Tune into this episode to learn how to be in the moment in your parenting, working with emotions, and...

How many times a week do you change a diaper? How many times a week do you give your kids a ride? How many times a week do you cook? Do the dishes? Support schoolwork? When and where do your needs get met?   Of course, these are the tasks that come along with parenting and yet it can feel like a lot! You might even wonder? - Is THIS what I signed up for? What was I thinking?   And on a deeper leve...

Children are by nature embodied.   They experience the world through the five senses without thinking much about it. When something comes up that registers as pain or displeasure they act out through their bodies.   As a child, so did you- it is developmentally appropriate.   If you were punished or consequenced for your behavior instead of supported to stay embodied you'll struggle when your chil...

Are you hard on yourself when you yell at your child? Do you beat yourself up if you forget to do what you promised? What stories do you tell yourself when you don't live up to your expectations?   Oftentimes, especially in parenting, it's easy to get caught in a spiral of vulnerable feelings that lead to BIG REACTIVE BEHAVIORS.   The secret ingredient in turning these patterns around is Kindness,...

Do you feel at times that everything is up to you? Getting school work done? Getting the house in order? Managing the kid's schedules, feelings, meals?   My guess is that when you're nailing it you feel amazing! Right?
   But then what happens when you're not getting it all done? Where is your support? How do you get support? Is it ok to get support?   Let's find out some answers to these question...

What if feelings of rage and judgment are protections for the younger more vulnerable one in you?   Are you willing to go into your anger, or your judgment and find out what is behind them?   It can be so hard to do that because we have been heavily conditioned to be one thing or another and we needed these strategies to feel safe with our caretakers.   What if your precious vulnerability is hidin...

Is disappointment a daily part of your parenting journey?  Do you work hard to take care of everyone- only to find yourself at the end of the day feeling like nothing went right? Disappointment can feel heavy and lead to depression especially when you identify that you are a disappointment. In this episode, you'll discover a way to ride the waves of disappointment while offering kindness to yourse...

Do you wake up every day wondering how you're going to get your TO DO's done? Do you sometimes wonder if you're enough or how this is all supposed to make sense? In this episode, you'll be supported to notice what parts of YOU could use some TLC?  A little tenderness here and there can go a long way!   www.purejoyparenting.com

Rage is one of the biggest issues I hear from parents. It is defined as violent, uncontrollable anger.  I don't know about you- but I was a master of controlling and repressing anger until I wasn't.  I grew up with a raging Mom so organized my adult life to never feel rage in my relationships. In this podcast, I share my breakthrough and how turning towards rage broke something loose- something mo...

How do you connect with your kiddo around their day? Do you hear their sharing as complaining or venting?  Do you know the difference between the two? It makes a HUGE difference in how you respond. In this episode of Parenting Paused I share how to recognize the difference and to support yourself and your child is being seen, heard, and understood.

Are you a fan of attachment parenting? It can feel yummy to always be there for your kiddo- being available to them and making sure all their needs are met on demand. In this episode, we explore the other side of attachment - healthy separation. It's the missing piece! Do you know how to healthily separate from your child? Do you know how to take responsibility for your boundaries and feelings? Ch...

Do you feel like your kids are after you? Like you're walking on egg shells or tip toeing around their big feelings?   If so- you may be positioned as a victim and there are some compelling reasons why. Most likely you were trained to look outside yourself to make sure everything was ok and you were in fact a victim of your circumstances.   Tune in to this episode of Parenting Paused to discover h...

Did you feel like you KNEW how to parent and was surprised when you realized you didn't? In this podcast you'll learn how embrace parenting as a path of discovery instead of knowing. 

If you didn't get your needs met as a child you may have the tendency to engulf your child. In your desire to "repair" what happened to you, you may project onto your child they have the same needs as you. Listen in to how you can create healthy separation in your relationship with your child. 

What lens do you look through as a parent? When your child acts out is it about you or is it about your child? In this episode I share what it looks like to see through the Purejoy lens. 

It's hard to honor your child if you weren't honored in your own family. If you are going to truly honor your child, you'll have to honor ALL of you as well. Each day, take a tiny steps towards loving all the parts of you that you hid away in order to be more acceptable to your parents. Welcome them home and offer them a seat at the table. 

As a child if you weren't supported to express your needs directly you learned to be sneaky to get them met. We pass down our early strategies to our children. In this episode you'll learn how to make your needs more direct and important.